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i am so sorry to hear of how your dad acted with you. my parents are great

but my inlaws are another story. they always made rude remarks about ben

(16ds) and compared him with their other grandkids. luckily i never had to

ask them to watch him because i do not trust them. when ben was about six i

had had enough and broke all ties with them . they were the rudest, meanest

people i had ever met. my husband continued to see them alone for about a

year and then he grew tired of them too. now we all live in the same city,

we run into each other all the time at the stores but you would think we were

total strangers. as far as i am concerned, one day they will regret that

they never knew benjamin (and brother alex). he has brought so much into our

lives, both good and bad and i wouldnt want it any other way.

kerrie mom to ben 16 ds (juvenile delinquent) and alex 13 nda (starting his

first summer romance)

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i am so sorry to hear of how your dad acted with you. my parents are great

but my inlaws are another story. they always made rude remarks about ben

(16ds) and compared him with their other grandkids. luckily i never had to

ask them to watch him because i do not trust them. when ben was about six i

had had enough and broke all ties with them . they were the rudest, meanest

people i had ever met. my husband continued to see them alone for about a

year and then he grew tired of them too. now we all live in the same city,

we run into each other all the time at the stores but you would think we were

total strangers. as far as i am concerned, one day they will regret that

they never knew benjamin (and brother alex). he has brought so much into our

lives, both good and bad and i wouldnt want it any other way.

kerrie mom to ben 16 ds (juvenile delinquent) and alex 13 nda (starting his

first summer romance)

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Sue,

I'll take them both! Just bring them over to NYC!!!! I also understand how

youre feeling about not having any one who understands. I'm glad you found

someone to watch them. It is very important to find some friends and people

who understand where you live. Is there any other groups for DS or kids with

spec needs????

you know, my brother doesnt really speak to us and I really feel he is losing

out on a great niece and nephew. It's his lose, just as it is your parents

lose. And that is very sad to say, but true. My mom is close to my kids but

my husband's parents live in fla and i feel they are losing out too. I lost

my dad when my son was just 2 and I feel really bad that they dont know their

grandpa. Be very happy with your two kids and feel blessed that they are

yours.

All the best for a speedy recovery and we're here if you need us!

~ Mom to amanda almost 11 DS and 7

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Sue,

I'll take them both! Just bring them over to NYC!!!! I also understand how

youre feeling about not having any one who understands. I'm glad you found

someone to watch them. It is very important to find some friends and people

who understand where you live. Is there any other groups for DS or kids with

spec needs????

you know, my brother doesnt really speak to us and I really feel he is losing

out on a great niece and nephew. It's his lose, just as it is your parents

lose. And that is very sad to say, but true. My mom is close to my kids but

my husband's parents live in fla and i feel they are losing out too. I lost

my dad when my son was just 2 and I feel really bad that they dont know their

grandpa. Be very happy with your two kids and feel blessed that they are

yours.

All the best for a speedy recovery and we're here if you need us!

~ Mom to amanda almost 11 DS and 7

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Sue,

First of all, we love you here on this list. I wish I lived closer so I

could watch your girls. I think many of us admire your strength through all

your hardships. I know one day things will change for you and you will

share that with us! Your going through a rough period....I hope it ends

soon for you.

Now, think positive...once you recuperate, you'll feel so much better!

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Sue,

First of all, we love you here on this list. I wish I lived closer so I

could watch your girls. I think many of us admire your strength through all

your hardships. I know one day things will change for you and you will

share that with us! Your going through a rough period....I hope it ends

soon for you.

Now, think positive...once you recuperate, you'll feel so much better!

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People can be so mean!! I know they say that people will get their just

dues in the end, but it still isn't right. When my mother and brother said

we shouldn't waste taxpayers money on these kids, I told them to take a

hike. If they only had taken the time to get to know . My goodness

she is only 9 1/2 months old but she sure is the sunshine of my life. I

wish I could give you the answer how to make people open their minds and

their hearts a little. On the other hand, that just means that there is

that much more of I don't have to share!!

Hope everything goes well for you. There is plenty of room here in Arizona

for your girls if they can stand the heat!!=)

Lesa

Mom to (9 1/2 m DS, and darn proud of it!!)

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People can be so mean!! I know they say that people will get their just

dues in the end, but it still isn't right. When my mother and brother said

we shouldn't waste taxpayers money on these kids, I told them to take a

hike. If they only had taken the time to get to know . My goodness

she is only 9 1/2 months old but she sure is the sunshine of my life. I

wish I could give you the answer how to make people open their minds and

their hearts a little. On the other hand, that just means that there is

that much more of I don't have to share!!

Hope everything goes well for you. There is plenty of room here in Arizona

for your girls if they can stand the heat!!=)

Lesa

Mom to (9 1/2 m DS, and darn proud of it!!)

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<<Thanks for listening. See why I feel you guys are my only true family?

That's why I tell you all " everything " , boring as it may be...

Sue mom to Kate 11 and Karrie 5 w/ds>>

Sue,

You are not boring at all! {{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}}

Just like many others on the list...I'd take your girls in a heartbeat!

You will be in my thoughts and I'm wishing you a speedy

recovery.

Gail

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<<Thanks for listening. See why I feel you guys are my only true family?

That's why I tell you all " everything " , boring as it may be...

Sue mom to Kate 11 and Karrie 5 w/ds>>

Sue,

You are not boring at all! {{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}}

Just like many others on the list...I'd take your girls in a heartbeat!

You will be in my thoughts and I'm wishing you a speedy

recovery.

Gail

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Sue,

Your parents are the ones losing out! Just keep a positive outlook and

refuse to let their issues get you down.

You have a whole bunch of friends who, if only geography wasn't an issue,

would take your girls in with open arms.

My mom does the " down syndrome boy / girl " thing too. Unbelievably annoying.

Lots of educating on our plates, yes?

Hugs,

Sandy

mom to Gabby (5, ds-asd)

and Adam (the muffin squisher)

>From: sue brown <sue@...>

>Reply-sue@...

>

>Subject: Pity party...

>Date: Wed, 11 Jul 2001 18:24:23 -0500

>

>My surgery for a total hysterectomy (abdominal) is scheduled for July

>23. The nurse said I can't come home that night, in fact, I have to stay

>3-4 days. Ok, single mom, no friends (here), no money to pay someone...

>I called my dad. I never ask my Dad or my Mom for anything. Now I

>remember why...

>My folks divorced 20 some odd years ago, but are still great friends. I

>asked Dad if he and Mom together could watch my 2 girls while I'm in the

>hospital. He said he was sure they could do it. Well, that lasted 20

>minutes. He called back and said they might consider watching Kate.

>Couldn't I get that girl I know around here that has " that Down syndrome

>boy " to watch Karrie? He said, " We don't know what to do with her and

>her Down syndrome " . He offered to pay someone 50 bucks a day to watch

>her.

>I found our friend from church to watch Karrie AND Kate while I'm in the

>hospital. And I'm going to let my Dad pay her $50 a day to watch them.

>I am soooo hurt. If my parents would just take the time to know their

>granddaughters, they'd see that Karrie is mostly just a little 5 year

>old girl, who does still have potty accidents, true, but who also deeply

>loves her " Boppa and momma " . I'm feeling really alone tonight and really

>sorry for myself. I learned a long time ago not to ask for help, because

>there is never any forthcoming from my " family " . But he didn't have to

>kick me in the teeth while he was saying no.

>Thanks for listening. See why I feel you guys are my only true family?

>That's why I tell you all " everything " , boring as it may be...

>Sue mom to Kate 11 and Karrie 5 w/ds

>

_________________________________________________________________

Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com

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Sue,

Your parents are the ones losing out! Just keep a positive outlook and

refuse to let their issues get you down.

You have a whole bunch of friends who, if only geography wasn't an issue,

would take your girls in with open arms.

My mom does the " down syndrome boy / girl " thing too. Unbelievably annoying.

Lots of educating on our plates, yes?

Hugs,

Sandy

mom to Gabby (5, ds-asd)

and Adam (the muffin squisher)

>From: sue brown <sue@...>

>Reply-sue@...

>

>Subject: Pity party...

>Date: Wed, 11 Jul 2001 18:24:23 -0500

>

>My surgery for a total hysterectomy (abdominal) is scheduled for July

>23. The nurse said I can't come home that night, in fact, I have to stay

>3-4 days. Ok, single mom, no friends (here), no money to pay someone...

>I called my dad. I never ask my Dad or my Mom for anything. Now I

>remember why...

>My folks divorced 20 some odd years ago, but are still great friends. I

>asked Dad if he and Mom together could watch my 2 girls while I'm in the

>hospital. He said he was sure they could do it. Well, that lasted 20

>minutes. He called back and said they might consider watching Kate.

>Couldn't I get that girl I know around here that has " that Down syndrome

>boy " to watch Karrie? He said, " We don't know what to do with her and

>her Down syndrome " . He offered to pay someone 50 bucks a day to watch

>her.

>I found our friend from church to watch Karrie AND Kate while I'm in the

>hospital. And I'm going to let my Dad pay her $50 a day to watch them.

>I am soooo hurt. If my parents would just take the time to know their

>granddaughters, they'd see that Karrie is mostly just a little 5 year

>old girl, who does still have potty accidents, true, but who also deeply

>loves her " Boppa and momma " . I'm feeling really alone tonight and really

>sorry for myself. I learned a long time ago not to ask for help, because

>there is never any forthcoming from my " family " . But he didn't have to

>kick me in the teeth while he was saying no.

>Thanks for listening. See why I feel you guys are my only true family?

>That's why I tell you all " everything " , boring as it may be...

>Sue mom to Kate 11 and Karrie 5 w/ds

>

_________________________________________________________________

Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com

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Oh Dear.....Sue, Where do you live? I'm here in South Dakota if that will

help, I'd love to help watch the kids!! My boys would love it!!!

I have Brady 7(he has cerebral palsy) and Lucas 5(ds) and when Lucas was

6weeks old I had to go in for an emergency hysterectomy(everything!) and had

to try to find some one to watch BOTH my boys. It really sucks when you

don't have a realiable source in your family!

When my oldest was born, we had to explain things to my in-laws( hard

enough) then when Lucas was born I was scared to explain it to them but we

did and we thought it was going good until a few months later when my mother

in-law asked me " if I have told anyone about 'him' " . I said sure I have, I

would rather have them here it from me so I can better explain things if

need be! Then I asked here if she has said anything, she said " well, only

that he was not all there " .......CAN YOU BELIEVE IT!!!!!!

She has gotten better,but still very " old-fashioned " (she is now in her late

70's).

So, I do wish you all the luck getting through to your family, BUT, don't

worry....we are family too!!!! :-)

Good Luck on your surgery.....write me privately if you want!!

Renae

Pity party...

> My surgery for a total hysterectomy (abdominal) is scheduled for July

> 23. The nurse said I can't come home that night, in fact, I have to stay

> 3-4 days. Ok, single mom, no friends (here), no money to pay someone...

> I called my dad. I never ask my Dad or my Mom for anything. Now I

> remember why...

> My folks divorced 20 some odd years ago, but are still great friends. I

> asked Dad if he and Mom together could watch my 2 girls while I'm in the

> hospital. He said he was sure they could do it. Well, that lasted 20

> minutes. He called back and said they might consider watching Kate.

> Couldn't I get that girl I know around here that has " that Down syndrome

> boy " to watch Karrie? He said, " We don't know what to do with her and

> her Down syndrome " . He offered to pay someone 50 bucks a day to watch

> her.

> I found our friend from church to watch Karrie AND Kate while I'm in the

> hospital. And I'm going to let my Dad pay her $50 a day to watch them.

> I am soooo hurt. If my parents would just take the time to know their

> granddaughters, they'd see that Karrie is mostly just a little 5 year

> old girl, who does still have potty accidents, true, but who also deeply

> loves her " Boppa and momma " . I'm feeling really alone tonight and really

> sorry for myself. I learned a long time ago not to ask for help, because

> there is never any forthcoming from my " family " . But he didn't have to

> kick me in the teeth while he was saying no.

> Thanks for listening. See why I feel you guys are my only true family?

> That's why I tell you all " everything " , boring as it may be...

> Sue mom to Kate 11 and Karrie 5 w/ds

>

>

> Click reply to all for messages to go to the list. Just hit reply for

messages to go to the sender of the message.

>

>

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Oh Dear.....Sue, Where do you live? I'm here in South Dakota if that will

help, I'd love to help watch the kids!! My boys would love it!!!

I have Brady 7(he has cerebral palsy) and Lucas 5(ds) and when Lucas was

6weeks old I had to go in for an emergency hysterectomy(everything!) and had

to try to find some one to watch BOTH my boys. It really sucks when you

don't have a realiable source in your family!

When my oldest was born, we had to explain things to my in-laws( hard

enough) then when Lucas was born I was scared to explain it to them but we

did and we thought it was going good until a few months later when my mother

in-law asked me " if I have told anyone about 'him' " . I said sure I have, I

would rather have them here it from me so I can better explain things if

need be! Then I asked here if she has said anything, she said " well, only

that he was not all there " .......CAN YOU BELIEVE IT!!!!!!

She has gotten better,but still very " old-fashioned " (she is now in her late

70's).

So, I do wish you all the luck getting through to your family, BUT, don't

worry....we are family too!!!! :-)

Good Luck on your surgery.....write me privately if you want!!

Renae

Pity party...

> My surgery for a total hysterectomy (abdominal) is scheduled for July

> 23. The nurse said I can't come home that night, in fact, I have to stay

> 3-4 days. Ok, single mom, no friends (here), no money to pay someone...

> I called my dad. I never ask my Dad or my Mom for anything. Now I

> remember why...

> My folks divorced 20 some odd years ago, but are still great friends. I

> asked Dad if he and Mom together could watch my 2 girls while I'm in the

> hospital. He said he was sure they could do it. Well, that lasted 20

> minutes. He called back and said they might consider watching Kate.

> Couldn't I get that girl I know around here that has " that Down syndrome

> boy " to watch Karrie? He said, " We don't know what to do with her and

> her Down syndrome " . He offered to pay someone 50 bucks a day to watch

> her.

> I found our friend from church to watch Karrie AND Kate while I'm in the

> hospital. And I'm going to let my Dad pay her $50 a day to watch them.

> I am soooo hurt. If my parents would just take the time to know their

> granddaughters, they'd see that Karrie is mostly just a little 5 year

> old girl, who does still have potty accidents, true, but who also deeply

> loves her " Boppa and momma " . I'm feeling really alone tonight and really

> sorry for myself. I learned a long time ago not to ask for help, because

> there is never any forthcoming from my " family " . But he didn't have to

> kick me in the teeth while he was saying no.

> Thanks for listening. See why I feel you guys are my only true family?

> That's why I tell you all " everything " , boring as it may be...

> Sue mom to Kate 11 and Karrie 5 w/ds

>

>

> Click reply to all for messages to go to the list. Just hit reply for

messages to go to the sender of the message.

>

>

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We have been lucky in our families acceptance of . We just had

one ex-son-in-law-----One reason he's an ex. But he doesn't know how to get

along with anyone. He hurt 's feelings by ignoring him but R. didn't

feel so bad when we told him none of the rest of us liked the guy either.

otherwise family have been great. was very close to his grandmother

on my side. He has one half sister he has never seen, and a half brother he

has barely seen but he isn't missing a thing. He has 2 others who are great

to him. You are better of without people who aren't interested in the kids.

Jessie

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We have been lucky in our families acceptance of . We just had

one ex-son-in-law-----One reason he's an ex. But he doesn't know how to get

along with anyone. He hurt 's feelings by ignoring him but R. didn't

feel so bad when we told him none of the rest of us liked the guy either.

otherwise family have been great. was very close to his grandmother

on my side. He has one half sister he has never seen, and a half brother he

has barely seen but he isn't missing a thing. He has 2 others who are great

to him. You are better of without people who aren't interested in the kids.

Jessie

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Hi Sue,

I know it is tough being a single mom and alone. I am also a single mom to

Hassan 4 w/ds. He is my world. I am actually building a small business for

him (with the limited income we have). Hopefully by the time he is a teenager

the small business will be a franchise. I am also expecting another bundle of

joy in Oct. I live in SE Portland, OR. If I am close to you I would love to

help. I get my strength from praying and from my KING Hassan:) If I can do

anything to cheer you up let me know. So many people in this group brought a

smile to my face when I felt alone. I would like to return the favorite. So

smile and know that there are people who care about you in this sometimes

cold and lonely world. You're definitely not alone. I hope everything goes

well with you and your family.

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Hi Sue,

I know it is tough being a single mom and alone. I am also a single mom to

Hassan 4 w/ds. He is my world. I am actually building a small business for

him (with the limited income we have). Hopefully by the time he is a teenager

the small business will be a franchise. I am also expecting another bundle of

joy in Oct. I live in SE Portland, OR. If I am close to you I would love to

help. I get my strength from praying and from my KING Hassan:) If I can do

anything to cheer you up let me know. So many people in this group brought a

smile to my face when I felt alone. I would like to return the favorite. So

smile and know that there are people who care about you in this sometimes

cold and lonely world. You're definitely not alone. I hope everything goes

well with you and your family.

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When was born we told our other kids, my parents, and a couple

friends. We decided not to tell anyone else at first, anyway. I didn't want

people coming around out of curiosity to look at him, and feeling sorry for

me, (since I didn't), and we knew there were some who wouldn't give him a

chance if they knew first. I still feel it was the right thing for us. One

of the friends we did tell never did see past the DS. She was good to him

but looked at him differently. The others got to know him before they

realized there was anything different and by then they loved him and it

didn't matter. He was so bright and normal at first and didn't have health

problems so it worked out well. Some parents don't feel right if they don't

tell everyone they know, and that is right for them.

We didn't tell my husband's family either. They lived in England and

his mother was about 80 and we weren't sure how she would take it, and she

wasn't ever likely to see him. Wouldn't you know his mother lived to be 99.

They never did mention it but after she was gone we did say something, and

his sister said, " Oh yes, we've known all along, from pictures. " They seemed

to be fine with it. But then they weren't around being asked to baby sit

either.

I still don't really tell people. He is just my son and if they know

all right and if they don't that's all right too. When I took him for an

interview for Montessori preschool the teacher accepted him with no

questions so I didn't offer anything. A couple weeks after he started I went

in figuring I should explain but she was so busy telling me how well he was

doing, I didn't bring it up. I don't know when she figured it out. But when

we were looking for another school for him later she told me to do the same

thing to them, which I got a kick out of.

I know this wouldn't work for everybody, and I'm not ashamed of the

DS. But I am so proud of HIM and he's such a great guy, that's the important

thing. I couldn't ask for a better son. Jessie

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