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Struggling To Die

By Somi Obozuwa

Somi Obozuwa is from Edo state, Nigeria. She holds a BA in Philosophy

from the University of Lagos. She lives in NY where she works as an

accounts officer.

Life, as is often said, is a struggle. But no one personifies this

statement quite like African children dying of HIV/AIDS. They are

constantly in pain so everything is a struggle; they struggle just to

fall asleep, to wake up, to eat and even to smile. The pain is more

than their barely developing brains or bodies can comprehend.

On a tiny bed of the clean but crowded children's ward in a Hospital

in KwaZulu-Natal, a tiny, staring child lies dying. She is three and

has hardly known a day of good health. Now her skin wrinkles around

her body like an oversize suit, and her twig-size bones can barely

hold her vertical as nurses search for a vein to take blood. In the

frail arms hooked up to transfusion tubes, her veins have collapsed.

She mews like a wounded animal as one tightens a rubber band around

her head to raise a vein. Tears pour unnoticed from her mother's eyes

as she watches the needle tap-tap at her daughter's temple. Each time

the whimpering child lifts a wan hand to brush away the pain, her

mother gently lowers it.

Drop by drop, the nurses manage to collect 1 cc of blood in five

minutes. This innocent child has had tuberculosis, oral thrush,

chronic diarrhea, malnutrition, severe vomiting. The vial of blood

reveals her real ailment, AIDS, but the disease is not listed on her

chart. Now the child is afflicted with so many symptoms that her

mother had to bring her to the hospital, from which sick babies rarely

return. She hopes, she prays her child will get better, and like all

the mothers who stay with their children at the hospital, she tends

her lovingly, constantly changing filthy diapers, smoothing sheets,

pressing a little nourishment between listless lips, trying to tease a

smile from the agonized face. The baby stares back vacantly without

blinking and three days later she is dead.

At first glance Ikhaya Lobomi ( " House of Life " ) seems to do its name

justice but, on closer scrutiny, it becomes clear that this is a place

for the rejected and the dying. The intense smell of sickness mixed

with the odor of decay lingers in the air of this AIDS hospice,

located in the Kwanyuswa area in the Valley of a Thousand Hills in

South Africa's eastern province of KwaZulu-Natal. In one of the beds

lie the remains of Mandla Ngcobo (not his real name), covered only by

a white sheet. He died three days ago but nobody has come to claim his

body, and it has now begun to fester in the heat of the humid coastal

province. Ngcobo's family refuses to be associated with a relative who

died of AIDS. It is now up to the hospice to bury the deceased, but a

funeral costs more than the volunteer-run clinic can afford. Until the

next donation comes in, Ngcobo's body will have to stay where it is.

Most of the people who come to Ikhaya Lobomi have nowhere else to go.

Few patients have visitors - their next of kin have abandoned them, as

if ridding themselves of the burden and disgrace of an HIV-positive

relative. In the bed next to the dead Ngcobo there is a grey-skinned

boy far too small for his age, his wide eyes full of apprehension – he

has seen many beds fill and empty since he came here. His health was

improving, but he is traumatized by the many deaths he has had to

witness and now his health is declining again. He is afraid and his

fear is killing him.

During the past decade more than 1 million children have been infected

with HIV in Africa and more than 90% of them got infected by their

mothers. Children with HIV infection suffer from the same common

childhood illnesses as those who are not infected. The illnesses,

however, are more frequent, last longer and may respond slower to

usual treatments. The rapid spread of the disease is largely

responsible for the escalating number of deaths of children below the

age of 5 in Africa. These are our babies, our children, our future

leaders dying of a disease that can be prevented by something as

simple as education; ignorance about AIDS is profound. It is the

crucial reason the epidemic has run out of control. Yet we turn away

and act as if there is nothing wrong with the picture.

The predominant mode of HIV transmission is sexual and prevention of

the continued spread of this disease must be based on fundamental

changes in individual and societal sexual attitudes and practices.

Prevention of common childhood infections through appropriate

immunization, effective management of childhood illnesses and

malnutrition, prevention and early treatment of opportunistic

infections can improve the quality of life of HIV infected children.

The most effective way to reduce HIV infection in children is to

prevent HIV infection in parents to-be and to prevent unplanned

pregnancies in HIV infected women. Education on the use and the

distribution of condoms, providing treatment for adults and children

infected with HIV will go a long way in reducing the spread of the

disease and the resulting deaths, especially of children. Also

children infected with HIV who are well nourished have fewer

infections and progress more slowly from HIV to AIDS.

These are facts I'm sure you have heard countless times and I'm not

going to bore you with the statistics of this decimating epidemic. The

truth is that these children need our help to combat the effects of

this disease on them; our time, money and most of all our love. They

cannot help themselves because they have no say in all of this. If

they did, death would not come to them as horribly as we see it.

Flesh, blood and humanity melt away from the bones of the sick and

dying children, who find themselves all alone because of their illnesses.

We need to open our hearts and give all that we can to help them; not

just talk about it or look at them and feel sorry for them wishing we

could do more. Yes we can do more, we can give money to help procure

drugs, food, clothes, blankets for them. We can give our time to take

care of them, to talk to them, play with them, take walks with them,

show them the beauty of life no matter how ugly it may seem to them.

How can we not, when we see how they live; the pain and suffering that

pervades their short lives. These are things that we have and can give

to them who have less than nothing. Most of all let us be kind with

our words and actions. In the end that is all that really helps;

knowing that someone truly loves them and cares about what happens to

them. They will all die, of tuberculosis, pneumonia, meningitis,

diarrhea, whatever overcomes their ruined immune systems first. So

much has happened to them and, try as we may, time cannot erase it

from our minds nor from the history books.

But we can try with all our might and all that we have inside of us to

correct the mistakes of the past and secure a brighter, happier future

for them. All we can do is help them wipe away their tears when they

cry and comfort them when they hurt inside from misery and pain. They

were meant to live and be so much more than a statistic but even that

has been cruelly ripped out of their tiny hands, through no fault of

theirs. Let us walk a mile in their little shoes and feel where and

how it hurts, share in their sorrows. Maybe then it will be easier to

give whatever and all that we can to help reduce their terrible

afflictions.

Open your hearts to these children and let them in. They need your

love and your help to live and, ultimately, die with dignity.

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Struggling To Die

By Somi Obozuwa

Somi Obozuwa is from Edo state, Nigeria. She holds a BA in Philosophy

from the University of Lagos. She lives in NY where she works as an

accounts officer.

Life, as is often said, is a struggle. But no one personifies this

statement quite like African children dying of HIV/AIDS. They are

constantly in pain so everything is a struggle; they struggle just to

fall asleep, to wake up, to eat and even to smile. The pain is more

than their barely developing brains or bodies can comprehend.

On a tiny bed of the clean but crowded children's ward in a Hospital

in KwaZulu-Natal, a tiny, staring child lies dying. She is three and

has hardly known a day of good health. Now her skin wrinkles around

her body like an oversize suit, and her twig-size bones can barely

hold her vertical as nurses search for a vein to take blood. In the

frail arms hooked up to transfusion tubes, her veins have collapsed.

She mews like a wounded animal as one tightens a rubber band around

her head to raise a vein. Tears pour unnoticed from her mother's eyes

as she watches the needle tap-tap at her daughter's temple. Each time

the whimpering child lifts a wan hand to brush away the pain, her

mother gently lowers it.

Drop by drop, the nurses manage to collect 1 cc of blood in five

minutes. This innocent child has had tuberculosis, oral thrush,

chronic diarrhea, malnutrition, severe vomiting. The vial of blood

reveals her real ailment, AIDS, but the disease is not listed on her

chart. Now the child is afflicted with so many symptoms that her

mother had to bring her to the hospital, from which sick babies rarely

return. She hopes, she prays her child will get better, and like all

the mothers who stay with their children at the hospital, she tends

her lovingly, constantly changing filthy diapers, smoothing sheets,

pressing a little nourishment between listless lips, trying to tease a

smile from the agonized face. The baby stares back vacantly without

blinking and three days later she is dead.

At first glance Ikhaya Lobomi ( " House of Life " ) seems to do its name

justice but, on closer scrutiny, it becomes clear that this is a place

for the rejected and the dying. The intense smell of sickness mixed

with the odor of decay lingers in the air of this AIDS hospice,

located in the Kwanyuswa area in the Valley of a Thousand Hills in

South Africa's eastern province of KwaZulu-Natal. In one of the beds

lie the remains of Mandla Ngcobo (not his real name), covered only by

a white sheet. He died three days ago but nobody has come to claim his

body, and it has now begun to fester in the heat of the humid coastal

province. Ngcobo's family refuses to be associated with a relative who

died of AIDS. It is now up to the hospice to bury the deceased, but a

funeral costs more than the volunteer-run clinic can afford. Until the

next donation comes in, Ngcobo's body will have to stay where it is.

Most of the people who come to Ikhaya Lobomi have nowhere else to go.

Few patients have visitors - their next of kin have abandoned them, as

if ridding themselves of the burden and disgrace of an HIV-positive

relative. In the bed next to the dead Ngcobo there is a grey-skinned

boy far too small for his age, his wide eyes full of apprehension – he

has seen many beds fill and empty since he came here. His health was

improving, but he is traumatized by the many deaths he has had to

witness and now his health is declining again. He is afraid and his

fear is killing him.

During the past decade more than 1 million children have been infected

with HIV in Africa and more than 90% of them got infected by their

mothers. Children with HIV infection suffer from the same common

childhood illnesses as those who are not infected. The illnesses,

however, are more frequent, last longer and may respond slower to

usual treatments. The rapid spread of the disease is largely

responsible for the escalating number of deaths of children below the

age of 5 in Africa. These are our babies, our children, our future

leaders dying of a disease that can be prevented by something as

simple as education; ignorance about AIDS is profound. It is the

crucial reason the epidemic has run out of control. Yet we turn away

and act as if there is nothing wrong with the picture.

The predominant mode of HIV transmission is sexual and prevention of

the continued spread of this disease must be based on fundamental

changes in individual and societal sexual attitudes and practices.

Prevention of common childhood infections through appropriate

immunization, effective management of childhood illnesses and

malnutrition, prevention and early treatment of opportunistic

infections can improve the quality of life of HIV infected children.

The most effective way to reduce HIV infection in children is to

prevent HIV infection in parents to-be and to prevent unplanned

pregnancies in HIV infected women. Education on the use and the

distribution of condoms, providing treatment for adults and children

infected with HIV will go a long way in reducing the spread of the

disease and the resulting deaths, especially of children. Also

children infected with HIV who are well nourished have fewer

infections and progress more slowly from HIV to AIDS.

These are facts I'm sure you have heard countless times and I'm not

going to bore you with the statistics of this decimating epidemic. The

truth is that these children need our help to combat the effects of

this disease on them; our time, money and most of all our love. They

cannot help themselves because they have no say in all of this. If

they did, death would not come to them as horribly as we see it.

Flesh, blood and humanity melt away from the bones of the sick and

dying children, who find themselves all alone because of their illnesses.

We need to open our hearts and give all that we can to help them; not

just talk about it or look at them and feel sorry for them wishing we

could do more. Yes we can do more, we can give money to help procure

drugs, food, clothes, blankets for them. We can give our time to take

care of them, to talk to them, play with them, take walks with them,

show them the beauty of life no matter how ugly it may seem to them.

How can we not, when we see how they live; the pain and suffering that

pervades their short lives. These are things that we have and can give

to them who have less than nothing. Most of all let us be kind with

our words and actions. In the end that is all that really helps;

knowing that someone truly loves them and cares about what happens to

them. They will all die, of tuberculosis, pneumonia, meningitis,

diarrhea, whatever overcomes their ruined immune systems first. So

much has happened to them and, try as we may, time cannot erase it

from our minds nor from the history books.

But we can try with all our might and all that we have inside of us to

correct the mistakes of the past and secure a brighter, happier future

for them. All we can do is help them wipe away their tears when they

cry and comfort them when they hurt inside from misery and pain. They

were meant to live and be so much more than a statistic but even that

has been cruelly ripped out of their tiny hands, through no fault of

theirs. Let us walk a mile in their little shoes and feel where and

how it hurts, share in their sorrows. Maybe then it will be easier to

give whatever and all that we can to help reduce their terrible

afflictions.

Open your hearts to these children and let them in. They need your

love and your help to live and, ultimately, die with dignity.

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OMG Chifu! Now THAT was a read. She said it like few can. May God bless our children.Chifu <chifu2222@...> wrote: Struggling To Die By Somi Obozuwa Somi Obozuwa is from Edo state, Nigeria. She holds a BA in Philosophyfrom the University of Lagos. She lives in NY where she works as anaccounts officer. Life, as is often said, is a struggle. But no one personifies thisstatement quite like African children dying of HIV/AIDS. They areconstantly in pain so everything is a struggle; they struggle just tofall asleep, to wake up, to eat and even to smile. The pain is morethan their barely developing brains or bodies can comprehend. On a tiny bed of the clean but crowded children's ward in a Hospitalin KwaZulu-Natal, a tiny, staring child lies dying. She is three andhas

hardly known a day of good health. Now her skin wrinkles aroundher body like an oversize suit, and her twig-size bones can barelyhold her vertical as nurses search for a vein to take blood. In thefrail arms hooked up to transfusion tubes, her veins have collapsed.She mews like a wounded animal as one tightens a rubber band aroundher head to raise a vein. Tears pour unnoticed from her mother's eyesas she watches the needle tap-tap at her daughter's temple. Each timethe whimpering child lifts a wan hand to brush away the pain, hermother gently lowers it. Drop by drop, the nurses manage to collect 1 cc of blood in fiveminutes. This innocent child has had tuberculosis, oral thrush,chronic diarrhea, malnutrition, severe vomiting. The vial of bloodreveals her real ailment, AIDS, but the disease is not listed on herchart. Now the child is afflicted with so many symptoms that hermother had to bring her to the hospital,

from which sick babies rarelyreturn. She hopes, she prays her child will get better, and like allthe mothers who stay with their children at the hospital, she tendsher lovingly, constantly changing filthy diapers, smoothing sheets,pressing a little nourishment between listless lips, trying to tease asmile from the agonized face. The baby stares back vacantly withoutblinking and three days later she is dead. At first glance Ikhaya Lobomi ("House of Life") seems to do its namejustice but, on closer scrutiny, it becomes clear that this is a placefor the rejected and the dying. The intense smell of sickness mixedwith the odor of decay lingers in the air of this AIDS hospice,located in the Kwanyuswa area in the Valley of a Thousand Hills inSouth Africa's eastern province of KwaZulu-Natal. In one of the bedslie the remains of Mandla Ngcobo (not his real name), covered only bya white sheet. He died three days ago but

nobody has come to claim hisbody, and it has now begun to fester in the heat of the humid coastalprovince. Ngcobo's family refuses to be associated with a relative whodied of AIDS. It is now up to the hospice to bury the deceased, but afuneral costs more than the volunteer-run clinic can afford. Until thenext donation comes in, Ngcobo's body will have to stay where it is.Most of the people who come to Ikhaya Lobomi have nowhere else to go.Few patients have visitors - their next of kin have abandoned them, asif ridding themselves of the burden and disgrace of an HIV-positiverelative. In the bed next to the dead Ngcobo there is a grey-skinnedboy far too small for his age, his wide eyes full of apprehension – hehas seen many beds fill and empty since he came here. His health wasimproving, but he is traumatized by the many deaths he has had towitness and now his health is declining again. He is afraid and hisfear is

killing him. During the past decade more than 1 million children have been infectedwith HIV in Africa and more than 90% of them got infected by theirmothers. Children with HIV infection suffer from the same commonchildhood illnesses as those who are not infected. The illnesses,however, are more frequent, last longer and may respond slower tousual treatments. The rapid spread of the disease is largelyresponsible for the escalating number of deaths of children below theage of 5 in Africa. These are our babies, our children, our futureleaders dying of a disease that can be prevented by something assimple as education; ignorance about AIDS is profound. It is thecrucial reason the epidemic has run out of control. Yet we turn awayand act as if there is nothing wrong with the picture. The predominant mode of HIV transmission is sexual and prevention ofthe continued spread of this disease must be based on

fundamentalchanges in individual and societal sexual attitudes and practices.Prevention of common childhood infections through appropriateimmunization, effective management of childhood illnesses andmalnutrition, prevention and early treatment of opportunisticinfections can improve the quality of life of HIV infected children. The most effective way to reduce HIV infection in children is toprevent HIV infection in parents to-be and to prevent unplannedpregnancies in HIV infected women. Education on the use and thedistribution of condoms, providing treatment for adults and childreninfected with HIV will go a long way in reducing the spread of thedisease and the resulting deaths, especially of children. Alsochildren infected with HIV who are well nourished have fewerinfections and progress more slowly from HIV to AIDS. These are facts I'm sure you have heard countless times and I'm notgoing to bore you with

the statistics of this decimating epidemic. Thetruth is that these children need our help to combat the effects ofthis disease on them; our time, money and most of all our love. Theycannot help themselves because they have no say in all of this. Ifthey did, death would not come to them as horribly as we see it.Flesh, blood and humanity melt away from the bones of the sick anddying children, who find themselves all alone because of their illnesses. We need to open our hearts and give all that we can to help them; notjust talk about it or look at them and feel sorry for them wishing wecould do more. Yes we can do more, we can give money to help procuredrugs, food, clothes, blankets for them. We can give our time to takecare of them, to talk to them, play with them, take walks with them,show them the beauty of life no matter how ugly it may seem to them.How can we not, when we see how they live; the pain and suffering

thatpervades their short lives. These are things that we have and can giveto them who have less than nothing. Most of all let us be kind withour words and actions. In the end that is all that really helps;knowing that someone truly loves them and cares about what happens tothem. They will all die, of tuberculosis, pneumonia, meningitis,diarrhea, whatever overcomes their ruined immune systems first. Somuch has happened to them and, try as we may, time cannot erase itfrom our minds nor from the history books. But we can try with all our might and all that we have inside of us tocorrect the mistakes of the past and secure a brighter, happier futurefor them. All we can do is help them wipe away their tears when theycry and comfort them when they hurt inside from misery and pain. Theywere meant to live and be so much more than a statistic but even thathas been cruelly ripped out of their tiny hands, through no fault

oftheirs. Let us walk a mile in their little shoes and feel where andhow it hurts, share in their sorrows. Maybe then it will be easier togive whatever and all that we can to help reduce their terribleafflictions. Open your hearts to these children and let them in. They need yourlove and your help to live and, ultimately, die with dignity.

Talk is cheap. Use Messenger to make PC-to-Phone calls. Great rates starting at 1¢/min.

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OMG Chifu! Now THAT was a read. She said it like few can. May God bless our children.Chifu <chifu2222@...> wrote: Struggling To Die By Somi Obozuwa Somi Obozuwa is from Edo state, Nigeria. She holds a BA in Philosophyfrom the University of Lagos. She lives in NY where she works as anaccounts officer. Life, as is often said, is a struggle. But no one personifies thisstatement quite like African children dying of HIV/AIDS. They areconstantly in pain so everything is a struggle; they struggle just tofall asleep, to wake up, to eat and even to smile. The pain is morethan their barely developing brains or bodies can comprehend. On a tiny bed of the clean but crowded children's ward in a Hospitalin KwaZulu-Natal, a tiny, staring child lies dying. She is three andhas

hardly known a day of good health. Now her skin wrinkles aroundher body like an oversize suit, and her twig-size bones can barelyhold her vertical as nurses search for a vein to take blood. In thefrail arms hooked up to transfusion tubes, her veins have collapsed.She mews like a wounded animal as one tightens a rubber band aroundher head to raise a vein. Tears pour unnoticed from her mother's eyesas she watches the needle tap-tap at her daughter's temple. Each timethe whimpering child lifts a wan hand to brush away the pain, hermother gently lowers it. Drop by drop, the nurses manage to collect 1 cc of blood in fiveminutes. This innocent child has had tuberculosis, oral thrush,chronic diarrhea, malnutrition, severe vomiting. The vial of bloodreveals her real ailment, AIDS, but the disease is not listed on herchart. Now the child is afflicted with so many symptoms that hermother had to bring her to the hospital,

from which sick babies rarelyreturn. She hopes, she prays her child will get better, and like allthe mothers who stay with their children at the hospital, she tendsher lovingly, constantly changing filthy diapers, smoothing sheets,pressing a little nourishment between listless lips, trying to tease asmile from the agonized face. The baby stares back vacantly withoutblinking and three days later she is dead. At first glance Ikhaya Lobomi ("House of Life") seems to do its namejustice but, on closer scrutiny, it becomes clear that this is a placefor the rejected and the dying. The intense smell of sickness mixedwith the odor of decay lingers in the air of this AIDS hospice,located in the Kwanyuswa area in the Valley of a Thousand Hills inSouth Africa's eastern province of KwaZulu-Natal. In one of the bedslie the remains of Mandla Ngcobo (not his real name), covered only bya white sheet. He died three days ago but

nobody has come to claim hisbody, and it has now begun to fester in the heat of the humid coastalprovince. Ngcobo's family refuses to be associated with a relative whodied of AIDS. It is now up to the hospice to bury the deceased, but afuneral costs more than the volunteer-run clinic can afford. Until thenext donation comes in, Ngcobo's body will have to stay where it is.Most of the people who come to Ikhaya Lobomi have nowhere else to go.Few patients have visitors - their next of kin have abandoned them, asif ridding themselves of the burden and disgrace of an HIV-positiverelative. In the bed next to the dead Ngcobo there is a grey-skinnedboy far too small for his age, his wide eyes full of apprehension – hehas seen many beds fill and empty since he came here. His health wasimproving, but he is traumatized by the many deaths he has had towitness and now his health is declining again. He is afraid and hisfear is

killing him. During the past decade more than 1 million children have been infectedwith HIV in Africa and more than 90% of them got infected by theirmothers. Children with HIV infection suffer from the same commonchildhood illnesses as those who are not infected. The illnesses,however, are more frequent, last longer and may respond slower tousual treatments. The rapid spread of the disease is largelyresponsible for the escalating number of deaths of children below theage of 5 in Africa. These are our babies, our children, our futureleaders dying of a disease that can be prevented by something assimple as education; ignorance about AIDS is profound. It is thecrucial reason the epidemic has run out of control. Yet we turn awayand act as if there is nothing wrong with the picture. The predominant mode of HIV transmission is sexual and prevention ofthe continued spread of this disease must be based on

fundamentalchanges in individual and societal sexual attitudes and practices.Prevention of common childhood infections through appropriateimmunization, effective management of childhood illnesses andmalnutrition, prevention and early treatment of opportunisticinfections can improve the quality of life of HIV infected children. The most effective way to reduce HIV infection in children is toprevent HIV infection in parents to-be and to prevent unplannedpregnancies in HIV infected women. Education on the use and thedistribution of condoms, providing treatment for adults and childreninfected with HIV will go a long way in reducing the spread of thedisease and the resulting deaths, especially of children. Alsochildren infected with HIV who are well nourished have fewerinfections and progress more slowly from HIV to AIDS. These are facts I'm sure you have heard countless times and I'm notgoing to bore you with

the statistics of this decimating epidemic. Thetruth is that these children need our help to combat the effects ofthis disease on them; our time, money and most of all our love. Theycannot help themselves because they have no say in all of this. Ifthey did, death would not come to them as horribly as we see it.Flesh, blood and humanity melt away from the bones of the sick anddying children, who find themselves all alone because of their illnesses. We need to open our hearts and give all that we can to help them; notjust talk about it or look at them and feel sorry for them wishing wecould do more. Yes we can do more, we can give money to help procuredrugs, food, clothes, blankets for them. We can give our time to takecare of them, to talk to them, play with them, take walks with them,show them the beauty of life no matter how ugly it may seem to them.How can we not, when we see how they live; the pain and suffering

thatpervades their short lives. These are things that we have and can giveto them who have less than nothing. Most of all let us be kind withour words and actions. In the end that is all that really helps;knowing that someone truly loves them and cares about what happens tothem. They will all die, of tuberculosis, pneumonia, meningitis,diarrhea, whatever overcomes their ruined immune systems first. Somuch has happened to them and, try as we may, time cannot erase itfrom our minds nor from the history books. But we can try with all our might and all that we have inside of us tocorrect the mistakes of the past and secure a brighter, happier futurefor them. All we can do is help them wipe away their tears when theycry and comfort them when they hurt inside from misery and pain. Theywere meant to live and be so much more than a statistic but even thathas been cruelly ripped out of their tiny hands, through no fault

oftheirs. Let us walk a mile in their little shoes and feel where andhow it hurts, share in their sorrows. Maybe then it will be easier togive whatever and all that we can to help reduce their terribleafflictions. Open your hearts to these children and let them in. They need yourlove and your help to live and, ultimately, die with dignity.

Talk is cheap. Use Messenger to make PC-to-Phone calls. Great rates starting at 1¢/min.

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