God news about my mom ( I )

[Guest guest]

Hello, dear friends:

At first, I would like to thank you for all your invaluable help and

information during these months. I wouldn't have been able to make it

without your guidance. Thanks vincent, cliff, cbormann, moonbeam, ingo,

melinda, leonard, cheryl, song and so on. You have made me learn many things

here and helped me do my best with my mother.

As I told you in my last message last week, I was feeling very confused

about the way my mom was getting worse.Well, the day I wrote you, Thursday,

I was sent back home by my boss, because she saw me literally sleeping in my

desk. I had been finishing my Thesis, so I had been sleeping 2 hours Monday,

5 hours Tuesday and 1.5 hours Wednesday. Besides, 4 hours Thursday, because

I got updated with my brother after being a bit disconnected for 4 days.

When I got home and saw the results of the exam, I just got very confused

and started to think about it, and deeply talk with my brother, as I told

you. Thank God, since that day, I started to search for spiritual help. I

prayed a lot to God, for giving me more faith and strength. I began to find

it since that day. Monday we decided to get my mother a probe. It was hard

to see her accept the probe, but feeling disconforted, and sometimes trying

to complain with words we could barely understand. Since that day, we also

hire a night nurse, so my father could rest more, because it has been very

difficult for him the last days. He was making too much effort by himself,

carrying my mom to the bathroom. My mom never wanted her sons to help her,

but the last days we had to be there.

We thought the probe will help my mom get better, so we started to give her

a diet rich in proteins. My brother talked to some nutrionists that helped

us. He also talked to an " endocrinologo " (don't know the translation), who

recommended Amaryl, a remedy for her lessen the glucose. Besides, during the

weekend we also contacted with a couple of spiritual people, one in India

and one in the States, who were known for distant healing. Both of them

recommended to read the Bible to my mom, and while the first one told us to

give her some blessed water, the second gave some spiritual exercises for my

mom.

Tuesday, I talked with a psycho that have helped some people even with

cancer to get rid of the sickness. He told me he could help my mother,

because she might have a lot of energy, but not well oriented, and she might

solve some internal conflicts to cut her relations with cancer.

Meanwhile, that day I felt very happy inside, because I thought God have

talked to me, making me understand the real lesson behind this experience.

And I feel He increased my faith too much that I was just very happy. I

asked Him very faithfully that please, absolutely cure my mother, but if

possible during the next week, she definitely got better, at least as stable

as a month and a half ago. I thought that I was sure He would answer my

prayers now. I was really trustful about it. Even at night, when my brother

called another doctor to see my mom, and he told us that we had to give her

all our love and try to make things easier for her, because she was really

deteriorating for the progress of cancer. After hearing that, I was a little

bit " moved " , but I didn't cry, I thoght I had heard that beofre, but I was

now with God at my side. Later, when I saw my mother worse that night, with

her probe and with her other hand swelling a bit, with more difficulties in

breathing, needing oxygen while going to the bathroom, I kept my smile by

her side although I recognise I became a bit scared, but I continued

praying, and also saying, " May be your will but not mine " , " Please, leave

her suffering, she has been suffering too much, so please cure her. I know I

am not asking you for something impossible, you have told us that we should

trust you anytime, you have cured a lotof people just because of theirfaith,

so I have more faith, you have really increased my faith, so please, let me

rescue her the same way she has rescued me now. PLease, cure her. "

Wednesdaymorning we have received the message from a spiritual person in

India, who gave us some indication for my mom to take some water blessed by

Jesus, while they were praying for my mom. At 2pm we took home a christian

man ( " evangelista " ) who supposedly had made some spiritual healings with his

hands. HE went to the house and prayed before my mom. She didn't say a word,

just moved her head and listened to the preacher. After some minutes of her

ritual ordering the cancer to get out of he body, he talked with us

brothers, and asked us to pray a lot, trusting God can do miracles and if we

asked that with faith, he will do them. He even recommended us some

versicles, read the bible and read it to my mom.

Wednesday night, I saw her the same way, so I decided to spend more time

with her, touching her hands, her hair, kissing her and telling her how much

I love her, that I needed her a lot, that we were going to get through this,

that I was going to sustain my Thesis Thursday, so I needed her help.

Then, I went to eat dinner. Then I returned and stayed a few minutes before

going to my room and try to study something. But I had almost no time to do

it. I was disturbed because my mom wanted to go to the bathroom, and it was

very loose, and she was needing oxygen even to go there... it seems her

nails began to get purple after the effort, so she was needed her oxygen. I

just talked with my brother, asking him about that and of it was related to

the probe. He told me that the day before she hadn't have any trouble with

her stomach. So, I urged him to ask the nutrionist what her problem was.

After thinking a bit, I thought it may be the vitamin C.... While trying to

study, I got sleep. At 5 am I was waken up by some movement in the house, I

went to my parents' room and saw her my mom with her mouth open trying to

breathe and saying " I die " . The nurse and my father were there changing the

oxygen bottle, while I was at my mother side, conforting her, telling her to

be stronger, that everything will pass, and we will pass it together. I

asked her to forgive me for everything I had done, to be strong and keep

fighting, because I loved her and I needed her a lot. I was touchingher

hand, her hair, giving her air with a flamenco fan, and kissing her. I

though she was doped with a pill, but my father told me she hadn't taken any

pills. When I got back to my room, I prayed once again and asked the Lord to

please make sometinhg as soon as possible, to absolutely cure her or, if it

may not be His will, to take her soon to his side, so she won't suffer

anymore.

At 8 am I woke up to go to work, and when I said goodbye to my mom, I

touched her hands once again, kissed her and told her that please that day

she should think a lot about me, because I had to sustain my Thesis that day

at 8pm. I have decided not to ask Lord anything for me, but everything for

my mom, so you should ask the Lord and to help me during this day. I

told her that was one of her dreams... some days he asked us to finish our

Thesis so she could go away in peace... I just told her, please, don't say

that.

So, this morning I recalled yhis was her dream, so she would ask the ones

above to help me, because she had always been listened to by them, and this

time would not be the exception. She would feel how she is listend to, so

she should ask for herslef too, so I would need her to ask for me today, Ok?

and she moved her head saying yes; we are going to get over this situation

together, I need you too much, I love you, so please keep on, I want you to

think of me today, so we will be connecteed today, ok? She moved her head

once again.

Once at work, I felt again that calm inside that my prayers would be

listened to and in less than a week my mother will recover and have no more

pain.However, in the afternoon, my mind was surprised with a thought that

matbe after my good news of the Thesis, I would have to share my mother's

deatth. But I dropped that thought and went on. I called my brother at

5.30pm and asked him to please tell my mom that I was going to go to my

university at 8 pm, and I was deeply thinking of her, and she would be my

force then, so she should keep on thinking of me.

My father wanted to see me sustaining my Thesis. So, at 7pm he went home

and asked my mother if he could go; he wanted to see me for just an hour to

share this moment with me, and my mother smiled and silently told him yes,

moving her head.

We (a friend and me) finished sustaining our Thesis at 8:50pm more or less,

and we got a 17 (from 0-20), an overwhelming qualification. So, we were

very happy. Initially I have thought to call my mother and tell her my news,

but before going to the universtiy, my cell phone had a very low batt, so I

turned it off and put inside my handbag. We took my friend home (it was near

our house), sharing happy comments, when suddenly in the middle of our

conversation, and almost 5 minutes from home, my father received a phone

call from my brother. My father told me that my mom had felt bad and have

some problems, so my brother wanted him to go there right away. The car was

in silence then on. Suddenly, I recall some movies where people receive that

kind of calls while driving, they try to speed up, found some traffic jam

and then it's too late.... But, rapidly I denied that thought. A minute

later, my father told me to call back my brother and told him to call the

main nurse. He just told me " I know, I know, please just come here soon. " I

thought that maybe they had some problems to carry my mom from bed to the

bath and they needed my father's help.

Then, some 3 minutes passed and, after taking my friend home, and being 10

blocks away from home, my father received another phone call from my brother

urging us to go there. He told him we were almost arriving there, so pleae

ask the maid to open the door.At that time I noticed a sort of ambulance

near our house... my heart beat faster. Effectively, when we arrived home,

we saw the emergency truck and my brother outside the house. My father went

out rapidly, and me too, but he gave me the car keys to lock the car.

Meanwile, some keys went out and I spent a minute in this locking the car.

Then I ran into the house, went upstairs to my mom's room and saw the

paramedics, while my brother made 2 movements with her right arm to the

heart; then my father asked him to call the lung-doctor, so he went upstairs

to his room, I almost followed him but went to the deskroom, closed the door

and screamed to God, saying PLEASE, I HAVE TOLD YOU TO CURE MY MOTHER NAD

NOT TO MAKE HER MORE SUFFERING. IT IS ENOUGH, DON'T YOU THINK? I was

thinking that my mother had had an emergency situation, she was delicate and

she was going to the clinic.

Then I went to my mom's room again and heard my father refering to a Defunct

Certificate. My world tumbled down. I sat and cried. Then, my father came to

hold me, we went upstairs to my brother's house and we 3 hold us and my

father told us to be strong, that we had to support ourselves in this

moment. He wanted to be strong, but I told him please, not now, just let it

flow and cry if you want. He wanted. And we tightly hold and cry together.

Then, a close friend of my parents called and we told her about my mom, she

screamed and cried along with me. After that, I went near my mom, and holded

her, kissed her, touched her head, her hair and cried, cried, cried.

We started then to call relatives and close friends, then I told my brother

to get a catholic preacher to give her the last sacrament. WE called her

church but no one answered. Our main regret about that was that she hadn't

gone to the church neither received the Communion in many many months. I

have decided to get her a preacher Saturday, we were going to get home also

a catholic healer next week and I have decided to start Friday reading her

the bible. I even had the versicles.....

But my mom won and didn't give us time. But, at least, the nurse told us

that she died peacefully. The problem seemed to be a congestion in her

sore, she couldn't expectorate and the nurse and my brother called doctors

to help her. She was breathing less and slowly each time according to my

borther, and he didn't even notice my mother was death, he thought she was

still breathing.

However, I could never share my hapiness of getting a great grade in my

Thesis, the way she always wanted. I wanted to give her a huge kiss and

smile at her and tell her how much I loved her and that I owed that nad

everything I am to her, that GOd always listened to her, so she must

totally trust him to cure her.

Well, I think that God, His way, responded my prayers: in less than a week

He released the suffering from my mother, that Dec. 13 at 9:05pm.

I guess she went away happier, she is not suffering anymore, and she will

be near me every day......

Sorry for this looooong message, but I think you could want to read me, and

if not for that reason, I wanted to share my experience with each one of you

that have helped me a lot these days. I am very grateful for your making

me do my best for my mom. It was not enough, or just it was the best

solution from God. He knows what he does for He loves us. Of course, I

miss her, I regret some things, and I know I will suffer for some dyas, but

I feel I'm going to get over it soon... I'm sure that's what she wants. I

know she will be guard angel and she will be my advisor any time. I just

have to drain all my pain and suffering and give more space to the happiness

and serenity that I can feel is inside my heart growing each day. I just

wanti to grow faster and make me avoid crying.

Thanks for all. I suppose I am not going to answer messages for some days,

but I'm not going to quit this list. I know God has made me pass through

this experience for some reasons, and maybe, just maybe, one of them could

be trying to help other in the same situation as me here in Peru, where

there is not much information about other treatments. Uncluckily, my mom's

case will not be the best one as I dreamed, so I will have to rethink this

idea (I had this idea many weeks beofre, but thinking that my mom would cure

and I could preach with the example).

I will write another mail soon, but shorter than this (don't woorry).

God bless you all, and I hope that everyone who is suffering from cancer

right now will find a cure for theirselves. Mom, please, watch for all

these people and try to help them.

carlos Izaguirre

Lima, Peru

Son of a lung cancer victim,

but son of the greatest mother in the world