Whoever wrote this should be much applauded.

[Guest guest]

Whoever wrote this should be much applauded.

1. Big companies don't do business via chain letters and there are no

computer programs that track how many times an e-mail is forwarded,

let alone by whom. Bill Gates is not giving you $1000, and Disney is

not giving you a free vacation. There is no baby food company issuing

class action checks.

2. Proctor and Gamble is not part of a satanic cult or scheme, and its

logo is not satanic.

3. MTV will not give you backstage passes if you forward something to

the most people.

4. The Gap is not giving away free clothes. You can relax; there is no

need to pass it on " just in case it's true. "

5. There is no kidney theft ring in New Orleans. No one is waking up

in a bathtub full of ice, even if a friend of a friend swears it

happened to their cousin. If you are hell bent on believing the kidney

theft ring stories, see:

http://urbanlegends.tqn.com/library/weekly/aa062997.htm And I quote:

" The National Kidney Foundation has repeatedly issued requests for

actual victims of organ thieves to come forward and tell their

stories. " None have. That's " none " as in " zero. " Not even your

friend's cousin.

6. Neiman Marcus doesn't really sell a $200 cookie recipe. And even if

they do, we all have it. If you make the recipe, decide the cookies

are that awesome, feel free to pass the recipe on.

7. If the latest NASA rocket disaster(s) DID contain plutonium that

> went to particulate over the eastern seaboard, do you REALLY think

this information would reach the public via an AOL chain letter?

8. There is no " Good Times " virus. In fact, you should never, ever,

ever forward any email containing any virus warning unless you first

confirm that an actual site of an actual company that actually deals

with viruses.

9. There is no gang initiation plot to murder any motorist who flashes

headlights at another car driving at night without lights.

11. If you still absolutely MUST forward that 10th-generation message

from a friend, at least have the decency to trim the eight miles of

headers showing everyone else who's received it over the last 6

months. (Think Cut and Paste) It sure wouldn't hurt to get rid of all

the ^^^ that begin each line either. Besides, if it has gone around

that many times we've probably already seen it.

12. Craig Shergold (or Sherwood, or Sherman, etc.) in England is not

dying of cancer or anything else at this time and would like everyone

to stop sending him their business cards. He apparently is no longer a

" little boy " either.

13. The " Make a Wish " foundation is a real organization doing fine

work, but they have had to establish a special toll free hot line in

response to the large number of Internet hoaxes using their good name

and reputation. It is distracting them from the important work they

do. Also, the American Cancer Society does not give 3 cents for each

person you forward e-mail to. They ask for you to donate money, money,

they don't give it, as if they could know how many e-mails you sent

out...sheesh.

14. If you are one of those insufferable idiots who forwards anything

that " promises " something bad will happen if you " don't, " -then

something bad will happen to you if I ever meet you in a dark alley.

15. Women really are suffering in Afghanistan, but forwarding an e-

mail won't help their cause in the least. If you want to help, contact

your local legislative representative, or get in touch with Amnesty

International or the Red Cross.

16. As a general rule, e-mail " signatures " are easily faked and mean

nothing to anyone with any power to do anything about whatever the

competition is complaining about.

17. KFC really does use real Chickens with feathers and beaks and

feet. No, they really do. Why did they change their name? In this

health conscious world, what was KFC's name? Kentucky FRIED Chicken.

FRIED is not healthy. So with the help of a focus group, they changed

the name to KFC. It's short, doesn't offend dieters and it's easy to

remember.

18. Another thing, just because someone said in a message, four

generations back, that " we checked it out and it's legit, " does not

actually make it true.

PS: There is no bill pending before Congress that will allow long

distance companies to charge you for using the Internet. Bottom

Line... composing e-mail or posting something on the Net is as easy as

writing on the walls of a public rest room. Don't automatically

believe it until it's proven false...ASSUME it's false, unless there

is proof that it's true.

Now copy, paste, and send this to everyone you know or the program I

just put on your hard drive while you read this E-mail will open up

your CD-ROM and reach out and slap you upside the head.

BaRbZ