Re:Guardianship reporting to court

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Amy

I asked my sister if she would have done it if she know all this in the beginning and though she hesitated she said yes. Thanks for your explanation about the other situations. We are trying to help our brother advocate for his girlfriend. More on all of this later. Nora

In a message dated 6/19/2007 8:26:51 A.M. Central Daylight Time, gingele@... writes:

Nora - I understand your feelings. Your first example is why state-appointed guardians are the guardians of last resort. Know however that your brother's girlfriend (with the help of your brother perhaps) can deal directly with the court if she feels that the facility she is in is no good. Any ward can write directly to the judge with any concern or issue and the judge (at least in Cook Co) will take it seriously and look into it.The second example is not the fault of the courts. With a wrongful death settlement the surviving children are entitled to a share - this is set by statute and not by the whim of the judge. I presume that the mom got a significant share for herself. The judge probably presumed that the mother would pay for her own daughters' braces out of her own funds (as the rest of us do) and not look to the girls' inheritance to pick up the tab. Now if the mom had no money of her own, that might be a different story. Also, the fact that a minor will come into the money at 18 is also set by staute, not the judge. This is the age of majority...and it is the same threshold we as parents deal with when we have disabled children. At 18 the law presumes you are an adult - actual maturity is irrelevant. Therefore, in your example, the minor children turend 18, and instantly they are a fully fledged legal adult with full rights and entitlements to that money. No doubt the mom wanted to withhold some if not all of the funds. Who wants an 18 year old to have access to more than $100? Let alone millions?!?! But again, that's not the judge's call - thats the law and the judge has absolutely no power to make any other decision whatsoever. Here the problem is not the court or the system - the problem as you see it is written down in the Illinois Statutes, which as you know are written by our legislators in Springfield. Your sister is the guardian of the estate and person. Is this a burden? Yes. It is an ongoing job with lots of work, no bonuses, no promotions, no accolades other than the peace of mind that the disabled adult is well cared for to the best of our abilities. And yes, often people do decline to act. Or maybe they start the job but soon realize how serious it is and then seek to step down. This is also why we as parents need to be careful in selecting or successor guardians.In this case the system is in place to protect the disabled adult who cannot effectively advocate and protect themselves. It is meant to be supervisory, it has built in accountability. The alternative (less rigorous accounting and/or reporting provisions) leaves our disabled adult children far too prone to financial abuse and even physical neglect or mistreatment at the hands of their guardians. Lets put it this way...had your sister known at the outset that all of this would be required of her...the annual reports, the petitions to the court to change placement, the annual accountings...had she known all this and more would be required, would she have declined to act?>> Amy

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We can handle the attorney fees for now but it just seems unfair that we have been through 4 attorneys already. Thanks though as I am sure others could use this info and who knows when we might need it. Nora

In a message dated 6/19/2007 8:34:14 A.M. Central Daylight Time, egskb@... writes:

Nora:

I feel terrible for your situation and though I am not able to offer any solutions, just know that so many of us have similar thoughts and feelings.

Our loved ones are so vulnerable and sometimes the very systems established to support and protect them, fail to do so. It is not hard to see why you and others become frustrated and angry.

I am sure there are attorneys who work for reduced fees and on sliding scales...anyone know of a competent attorney to recommend to Nora, who works with families on cost of service?

Ellen

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Dear Amy, Ellen and all

Is there anyway we can get a copy of the form to see what we need to do. I had a long conversation with my sister yesterday and she knows she has to do it but she also has to go back to work and has a house and small farm to care for, not to mention the three brothers to look out for. She is thinking it will take her awhile to get everything in order for the past 8 years worth of accountings. Do you think she needs to rush or could she set herself a goal of getting it all together in a year. One problem she has is she could not make the money in an out match exactly. Another issue is the family trust. It is not a SNT (my Mom really did everything wrong) it is a trust for all 8 of her kids and the principle can be spent on anyone but the income goes to the two brothers my sister is guardian of. My brothers also have an annuity and their SSI so she has not but the income in their accounts just left it in the trust to grow. OK, I know this is a lot but what do you think. Thanks to everyone for their advice and support. NoraSee what's free at AOL.com.

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In a message dated 6/20/2007 9:02:30 A.M. Central Daylight Time, egskb@... writes:

I would be happy to fax it to you if you send me a fax number, Nora.

Ellen

Thanks Ellen. I will send it to you off list. See what's free at AOL.com.

[Guest guest]

I would be happy to fax it to you if you send me a fax number, Nora.

Ellen

Ellen Garber Bronfeldegskb@...

Re: Re:Guardianship reporting to court

Dear Amy, Ellen and all

Is there anyway we can get a copy of the form to see what we need to do. I had a long conversation with my sister yesterday and she knows she has to do it but she also has to go back to work and has a house and small farm to care for, not to mention the three brothers to look out for. She is thinking it will take her awhile to get everything in order for the past 8 years worth of accountings. Do you think she needs to rush or could she set herself a goal of getting it all together in a year. One problem she has is she could not make the money in an out match exactly. Another issue is the family trust. It is not a SNT (my Mom really did everything wrong) it is a trust for all 8 of her kids and the principle can be spent on anyone but the income goes to the two brothers my sister is guardian of. My brothers also have an annuity and their SSI so she has not but the income in their accounts just left it in the trust to grow. OK, I know this is a lot but what do you think. Thanks to everyone for their advice and support. Nora

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[Guest guest]

Ok.

Ellen

Ellen Garber Bronfeldegskb@...

Re: Re:Guardianship reporting to court

In a message dated 6/20/2007 9:02:30 A.M. Central Daylight Time, egskbsbcglobal (DOT) net writes:

I would be happy to fax it to you if you send me a fax number, Nora.

Ellen

Thanks Ellen. I will send it to you off list.

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[Guest guest]

Nora, you have certainly given us Moms and Dads something to think about - Not that we were not already thinking about who will care for our disabled kids. Your Mother did something right in raising you girls. You are truly your Brothers' keeper. They are lucky to have you and your sister. The rest of us hope we are doing as good a job. I have a son (23), just out of college and I am hoping he can "have a life" AND be "his brothers keeper" for his 2 DD brothers and take care of his aging parents and with NO extended family. A sibling group might be very helpful for him. You girls take care - Your Mother was very blessed to have you!

Amy, thank you for responding to my question about reporting to court. You were very kind to take time to reassure me that we are fine. I think we are all a little gun shy and always waiting for the other shoe to drop.

JeanSee what's free at AOL.com.

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Touche......to NoraOn Jun 20, 2007, at 10:12 PM, carjben@... wrote:Nora, you have certainly given us Moms and Dads something to think about - Not that we were not already thinking about who will care for our disabled kids.  Your Mother did something right in raising you girls.  You are truly your Brothers' keeper.  They are lucky to have you and your sister.  The rest of us hope we are doing as good a job.  I have a son (23), just out of college and I am hoping he can "have a life" AND be "his brothers keeper" for his 2 DD brothers and take care of his aging parents and with NO extended family.  A sibling group might be very helpful for him.  You girls take care - Your Mother was very blessed to have you! Amy,  thank you for responding to my question about reporting to court.  You were very kind to take time to reassure me that we are fine.  I think we are all a little gun shy and always waiting for the other shoe to drop. JeanSee what's free at AOL.com.

[Guest guest]

Jean

Thanks so much for your kind words. I do not mean to bash my Mom. She was an amazing woman widowed at 43 with 7 of the 8 sibs still at home including the three sons with special needs. I understand why she did not trust people and why she felt the need to do it all herself. She did the best she could.

Does your son live in the area? We have a group that meets and we have one other young man who has twin brothers with disabilities in our group. A number of us are working hard to grow our group and are also part of a national sibling leadership group that will be meeting in DC in Nov. We are working hard to have our concerns heard and to advocate for our brothers and sisters. Thanks again. Nora

In a message dated 6/20/2007 10:18:13 P.M. Central Daylight Time, carjben@... writes:

Nora, you have certainly given us Moms and Dads something to think about - Not that we were not already thinking about who will care for our disabled kids. Your Mother did something right in raising you girls. You are truly your Brothers' keeper. They are lucky to have you and your sister. The rest of us hope we are doing as good a job. I have a son (23), just out of college and I am hoping he can "have a life" AND be "his brothers keeper" for his 2 DD brothers and take care of his aging parents and with NO extended family. A sibling group might be very helpful for him. You girls take care - Your Mother was very blessed to have you!

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[Guest guest]

There is a lot of information, including forms, here:http://gac.state.il.us/forms.html

>> Dear Amy, Ellen and all> > Is there anyway we can get a copy of the form > to see what we need to do.

[Guest guest]

You guys will make me blush. It is my sister that has the halo, i am only her assistant.

In a message dated 6/21/2007 12:57:05 P.M. Central Daylight Time, egskb@... writes:

I agree...Nora's brothers have wonderful sisters!

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Ellen

I got the fax this morning, thanks so much. The form does not look too horrible. NoraSee what's free at AOL.com.

[Guest guest]

I agree...Nora's brothers have wonderful sisters!

Ellen

Ellen Garber Bronfeldegskb@...

Re: Re:Guardianship reporting to court

Touche......to Nora

On Jun 20, 2007, at 10:12 PM, carjbenaol wrote:

Nora, you have certainly given us Moms and Dads something to think about - Not that we were not already thinking about who will care for our disabled kids. Your Mother did something right in raising you girls. You are truly your Brothers' keeper. They are lucky to have you and your sister. The rest of us hope we are doing as good a job. I have a son (23), just out of college and I am hoping he can "have a life" AND be "his brothers keeper" for his 2 DD brothers and take care of his aging parents and with NO extended family. A sibling group might be very helpful for him. You girls take care - Your Mother was very blessed to have you!

Amy, thank you for responding to my question about reporting to court. You were very kind to take time to reassure me that we are fine. I think we are all a little gun shy and always waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Jean

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[Guest guest]

Good luck, Nora.

I know the efforts you and your sister are making on behalf of your brothers is being appreciated from "above"...your parents are smiling down on you!

Ellen

Ellen Garber Bronfeldegskb@...

Re: Re:Guardianship reporting to court

Ellen

I got the fax this morning, thanks so much. The form does not look too horrible. Nora

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