Question of the week - 3

[Guest guest]

As far as other people's reaction to my spinal problems, I have just about given

up trying to educate anyone about them. Over all, people just don't care. To

most people I have a " bad back " .

The most hurtful incidents came from my in-laws. When I had my first revision

in 1988 my children were very young and we needed help and out family was 700

miles away. Mom-in-law refused to help as she was not a " babysitting grandma "

and she had a bad back too. My husband finally ended up driving the kids 700

miles to stay at his sister's for the two weeks I was in the hospital; then

driving 700 miles again to pick them up. No offer of help from family other

than that. At home he hired a health care worker to care for me and the kids;

nothing else he could do. My mom-in-law is an RN and her excuse to this day is

that she doesn't work in orthopedics so doesn't understand my problems, even

after showing her my x-rays. She just doesn't want to understand.

The one person who understands is my aqua exercise instructor. When her

daughter was in high school she had scoliosis and had to wear a brace and we had

the same doctor. I am grateful for her understanding. She understands what

exercises and stretches I can and can't do and even try to show me some

modifications.

Showing people my x-rays, the big ones,sometimes helps. People get kind of

squeamish when they see all that hardewear. I'm tired of having to justify my

limitations to everyone else. If they don't want to understand, to h--- with

them. Barbara