Re: Fear of FM symptoms and pain

[Guest guest]

Hi Beth, I also go through this vicious cycle of stress, anxiety and then a flare of symptoms. It is very hard for me to just"let go" of the stress or things that are bothering me.I am also a constant worrier. I have tried to change my breathing when I become stressed- when you are stressed you tend to breathe very shallowly. I try to breathe from my diaphragm(I know that's not spelled right) through your nose and out-believe it or not, this has helped me in times of stress. I also believe that as women, we are always trying to take care of and please everyone else in our lives(husband, kids,friends,etc)without enough TLC for ourselves. Having the constant symptoms of FMS only makes it worse. I have heard that massage is very helpful for stress but can be expensive.I also take Xanax for anxiety but I worry about becoming hooked on it. Good luckiggy188 <iggy188@...> wrote: I have had this thing for many years and I find that when I stress out about the pain and symptoms I feel so much worse. Dominie has mentioned so many times in her newsletter that stress makes FM worse. I know that I have been going through a couple of months of stress related problems and that I now am in more pain. When this happens it scares me and I know that I should be able to let it go but acceptance is not one of my strong suits. How do you all deal with the fear?Beth

[Guest guest]

BETH, WE ALL HAVE CERTAIN FEARS. THE WAY I DEAL WITH THEM IS I STOP AND LOOK AT WHAT I AM FEARING. IS IT A LEGIT THING TO WORRY ABOUT OR IS IT JUST ME? I HAVE A FEAR OF FALLING OF THINGS LIKE STAIRS, STEPS, LADDERS AND CLIMBING ON CHAIRS. MY FEAR IS BASED ON THE FACT I FALL ALOT ANYWAY. DO I LET MY FEAR GET THE BEST OF ME? NO I HAVE TO CLIMB STAIRS IN MY HOUSE. I JUST LEARNED HOW TO GO DOWN THEM USING A LONG BAMBOO CANE TO HELP STEADY ME. NOW SNAKES IS ANOTHER THING. YOU COULDN'T PAY ME TO HANDLE A SNAKE. THIS I AM SURE IS CONSIDERED AN ABNORMAL FEAR. I ALSO FEAR SPIDERS AND SHARKS. YET I KNOW DEEP DOWN MY CHANCES OF FACING THESE FEARS ARE HIGHLY UNLIKELY. AND IF THEY DO, I HAVE A PLAN OF ACTION TO DEAL WITH MY FEAR. RUN!!!!!!!! OK I THINK I CAN GO FASTER THAN A SNAKE OR SPIDER. iggy188 <iggy188@...> wrote: I have had this thing for many years and I find that when I stress out about the pain and symptoms I feel so much worse. Dominie has mentioned so many times in her newsletter that stress makes FM worse. I know that I have been going through a couple of months of stress related problems and that I now am in more pain. When this happens it scares me and I know that I should be able to let it go but acceptance is not one of my strong suits. How do you all deal with the fear?Beth

[Guest guest]

years ago i was involved with a man in recovery. i did some work on

myself at that time. i learned about self affirmations, re-training

your brain with positive thoughts.

currently my husband of 3 years is not being very nice. i have a

minute now and then thinking my marriage could be over. i have to

let go of those thoughts and think differently.

so it is mental exercise and I believe it works for those who

believe it can work.

>

> I have had this thing for many years and I find that when I stress

out

> about the pain and symptoms I feel so much worse. Dominie has

mentioned

> so many times in her newsletter that stress makes FM worse. I know

that

> I have been going through a couple of months of stress related

problems

> and that I now am in more pain. When this happens it scares me and

I

> know that I should be able to let it go but acceptance is not one

of my

> strong suits.

>

> How do you all deal with the fear?

>

> Beth

>

[Guest guest]

yeah Pam. thank you. i feel better and appreciate you sharing that.

i know how hard it is to acknowledge those feelings and then put

them away.

> >

> > I have had this thing for many years and I find that when I

stress

> out

> > about the pain and symptoms I feel so much worse. Dominie

has

> mentioned

> > so many times in her newsletter that stress makes FM worse.

I know

> that

> > I have been going through a couple of months of stress

related

> problems

> > and that I now am in more pain. When this happens it scares

me and

> I

> > know that I should be able to let it go but acceptance is

not one

> of my

> > strong suits.

> >

> > How do you all deal with the fear?

> >

> > Beth

> >

>

[Guest guest]

I have often thought of this... and i look back and realize what i have gotten through, and they i have come through rough times and got going again... i remember that i'm allowed to have a bad day and more then likely tomorrow will be better... blessed be liziggy188 <iggy188@...> wrote: I have had this thing for many years and I find that when I stress out about the pain and symptoms I feel so much worse. Dominie has mentioned so many times in her newsletter that stress makes FM worse.

I know that I have been going through a couple of months of stress related problems and that I now am in more pain. When this happens it scares me and I know that I should be able to let it go but acceptance is not one of my strong suits. How do you all deal with the fear?Beth

Never miss a thing. Make your homepage.

[Guest guest]

the other thing... looks at whats most important in life to you... family, friends, being pain free, certain activities that you enjoy, whatever... make sure you focus on these... and the fact the house isn't spottless doesn't matter!!!!!!! we all should remember the saying "grant me the strength to change what i can, the serenity to accept what cannot be changed and the wisdom to know the difference" this is so important for fibro people.. but the energy into the positive things and those things that matter.. do not give any support to negatives things and the little things that are meaningless in the long run... blessed be lizBeth Moorman <bethmrmn@...> wrote: Hi Beth, I also go through this vicious cycle of stress, anxiety and then a flare of symptoms. It is very hard for me to just"let go" of the stress or things that are bothering me.I am also a constant worrier. I have tried to change my breathing when I become stressed- when you are stressed you tend to breathe very shallowly. I try to breathe from my diaphragm(I know that's not spelled right) through your nose and out-believe it or not, this has helped me in times of stress. I also believe that as women, we are always trying to take care of and please everyone else in our lives(husband, kids,friends,etc)without enough TLC for ourselves. Having the constant symptoms of FMS only makes it worse. I have heard that massage is very helpful for stress but can be expensive.I

also take Xanax for anxiety but I worry about becoming hooked on it. Good luckiggy188 <iggy188> wrote: I have had this thing for many years and I find that when I stress out about the pain and symptoms I feel so much worse. Dominie has mentioned so many times in her newsletter that stress makes FM worse. I know that I have been going through a couple of months of stress related problems and that I now am in more pain. When this happens it scares me and I know that I should be able to let it go but acceptance is not one of my strong suits. How do you all deal with the fear?Beth

[Guest guest]

Amen . Coulnd't have said it better myself. Shirley Godbout

Re: Fear of FM symptoms and pain

the other thing... looks at whats most important in life to you... family, friends, being pain free, certain activities that you enjoy, whatever... make sure you focus on these... and the fact the house isn't spottless doesn't matter!!!!!! ! we all should remember the saying "grant me the strength to change what i can, the serenity to accept what cannot be changed and the wisdom to know the difference" this is so important for fibro people.. but the energy into the positive things and those things that matter.. do not give any support to negatives things and the little things that are meaningless in the long run...

blessed be

lizBeth Moorman <bethmrmn (DOT) com> wrote:

Hi Beth, I also go through this vicious cycle of stress, anxiety and then a flare of symptoms. It is very hard for me to just"let go" of the stress or things that are bothering me.I am also a constant worrier. I have tried to change my breathing when I become stressed- when you are stressed you tend to breathe very shallowly. I try to breathe from my diaphragm(I know that's not spelled right) through your nose and out-believe it or not, this has helped me in times of stress. I also believe that as women, we are always trying to take care of and please everyone else in our lives(husband, kids,friends, etc)without enough TLC for ourselves. Having the constant symptoms of FMS only makes it worse. I have heard that massage is very helpful for stress but can be expensive.I also take Xanax for anxiety but I worry about becoming hooked on it. Good luckiggy188 <iggy188cox (DOT) net> wrote: I have had this thing for many years and I find that when I stress out about the pain and symptoms I feel so much worse. Dominie has mentioned so many times in her newsletter that stress makes FM worse. I know that I have been going through a couple of months of stress related problems and that I now am in more pain. When this happens it scares me and I know that I should be able to let it go but acceptance is not one of my strong suits. How do you all deal with the fear?Beth

[Guest guest]

Hi Beth,Welcome! I really understand what you are talking about and I'm so sorry. What I do to cope is a couple of things - I cry when I need to, I find a good friend or family member that I can vent to - in fact I have several friends with Fibro too and we're in touch via email and text message. So we'll just text message each other on our cell phones when things are just not going well and it's really helpful to have that instant connection with someone, especially when the thought of talking sounds so hard - so energy draining! I also turn to my boyfriend of 5 years, who has been through much of my first few years of being diagnosed and he's lived with me too - for two years (we're not living together now but I'll soon be a lot closer to him in Portland, with him in Ashland, Oregon) but I can email him, call him and when I actually visit him or him to me, it's great - he really caters to me, really helps me in so many ways and is especially attentive when I am flaring. He can't fully understand it but he also gets some really bad headaches that come from his neck and I get them too, so we have that level of understanding at least. He can at least tell me that he's sorry I'm feeling the way that I am and tell me not to worry about things. What he says about worrying really makes sense. There are things that you can control and there are many more things that you cannot control. so if you're worrying about something you have no control over, it's just going to make you worse and probably make you flare up too and that is not good. so think to yourself what it is you're worrying about - can you change it or control it? if so, then do something about it. If not, then don't waste your energy worrying over it. Seriously, it took me a bit to get to a place where I really understood what he was saying but now that I think this new way, it has really changed my perspective of this illness. I just try to think very positively about my illnesses. I want to get better and so when I get scared, I talk to my doctor if needed, I talk to friends who I can ask if this new symptom or pain is 'normal' or if they've had it - because knowing that they have really helps me to calm down about it too. Hope that helps! Also, look into The Secret - there is a movie and a book and both are really helpful, especially if you suffer from negative thinking. It really does change the way that you feel. go to www.thesecret.tv. You can watch the trailer for the movie there too and get lots more info! whitney :)On Dec 13, 2007 7:35 AM, iggy188 <

iggy188@...> wrote:

I have had this thing for many years and I find that when I stress out

about the pain and symptoms I feel so much worse. Dominie has mentioned

so many times in her newsletter that stress makes FM worse. I know that

I have been going through a couple of months of stress related problems

and that I now am in more pain. When this happens it scares me and I

know that I should be able to let it go but acceptance is not one of my

strong suits.

How do you all deal with the fear?

Beth

-- Eat, sleep, dream and be the music!Life is short, live each day to its' fullest!Cave softly and leave no trace.Find a cure for chronic pain!Ask about The Purrfect Petsitter and Infinite Creations!