Another addiction cured!

[Guest guest]

Back when I was doing night shift nursing, I got my days and nights turned

around, and could no longer sleep at night. Fell asleep in the daytime. I was

given Ambien by my doctor. He said it wasn't addictive. WRONG! Some time later,

we began getting cautions at work about it. So what could I do.

Still later I was still having trouble with sleep, and my doctor sent me for a

sleep clinic evaluation. They diagnosed obstructive sleep apnea (OSA.) I waked

up many times a night, and my oxygen level dropped dangerously low. Now I had to

get used to sleeping with a mask on my face for CPAP (Continuous Positive Airway

Pressure.) This is the only real treatment for OSA, which is one of the most

common causes of high blood pressure and pulmonary hypertension. I already had

high blood pressure.

The sleep doctor told me to go ahead with the Ambien, because I would probably

have trouble getting accustomed to the mask otherwise. So I did. The side

effects bothered me - doing things at night and not remembering them the next

day. I ate strange things in that stupor - like leftover steak in the middle of

the night using scissors as a utensil. My kids told me about it. I had

hallucinations, too. I never drove a car under that influence, but some people

have.

I began to be really scared of the Ambien, and tried several times to quit it.

But I couldn't sleep without it. I would stay awake all night and be exhausted

next day. If I found myself running out on a weekend, I would panic big time.

I finally decided that if I could cure myself of overeating, I could cure the

Ambien addiction. So I went off it cold turkey. The first few nights, I took

Clonopin (borrowed from my husband who had some from a prescription that was

discontinued.) I also used a meditation CD with sounds of rain and Tibetan

singing bowls that gradually takes you from beta to alpha and then down to delta

and theta brain waves by entrainment. It is a great sleep CD or it can be used

while awake for incredibly deep meditation states. The first few nights - about

a week to 10 days - were rough, but it gradually got easier. I took myself down

on the Clonopin dose as I went.

Eventually I began to get sleepy at the appropriate time (at about 3 weeks).

When I tried to stop the Clonopin, though I would get incredibly anxious and

could not stay in the bed. Then I had the idea to use removals. (Why did it take

me so long? Heaven knows!) Anyhow I started doing a meditation in which I

removed anxiety from all my bodies individually after getting in the bed. It

worked! I had real true restful sleep for the first time in years. I was able to

gradually decrease the Clonopin from one tablet to half a tablet then a quarter

of a tablet, and finally none. If I begin to feel anxiety, I just remove it and

go on to sleep. I feel free for the first time since 1999. I have begun to dream

again. I intend to even get back to the point where I can consciously control my

dreams as I used to do.

Perhaps the most amazing thing is that I have learned to sleep with the mask on

with no trouble. My sleep doc didn't think I could do it. My next goal is to

continue to lose weight and perhaps at some point I can discard the mask

altogether! Not all OSA sufferers are overweight, but many are. And many

overweight people have it and don't know it. I think I had it even in graduate

school. I remember waking myself up many times a night by groaning in my sleep,

and waking in the morning with headaches. We will see what happens as I continue

to lose. My total pounds lost is 70 at this point. YAY!

That brings up another point. I had an appointment with my heart doctor a few

weeks ago. He was proud of my weight loss, but he questioned me about my goals.

When I told him 135 lb, he said, " Not going to happen. " I told him not to put

negative thoughts into the universe, and he told me that if I failed, it would

be my fault, not his! Can you believe the gall of that man? I believe I have

been interfered with from what he said, even though I gritted my teeth and vowed

to forget about it. It's like he put a curse on me right there in the office. I

am still trying to find what to do to counteract it. I have been able to get

back on track, but not with the same confidence as before. If anyone can help me

with ideas about immunic actions to take, I will appreciate it very much. I have

been working through the lesson in interference at this location:

http://www.wayimmune.org/colleague/apps/a07/interfer.htm

Please pardon this loooong post. I probably should have made two or three out of

it, but once I get rolling, it's hard to stop.

Love,

Meredith