Yoga Poem by Friend Published in Elephant Journal

[Guest guest]

Creative and Funny!

Via elephantjournal.com

on Mar 13, 2011

Yoga Class Writeoff. ~ ava bird

Photo: lululemon athletica

Yoga Class Writeoff

Yesterday, at yoga,

the receptionist asked if I wanted a receipt for the class.

With surprised confusion, “Yes!†I said,

then quickly asked the teacher

if I could

write this class off on my taxes.

“With this receipt, yoga master?â€â€¦

Could I get a break, please…

on the downward

dogward

upside upward

downward

and back around poses?,

Do you know?

Could I write off

my ass

in the air

on my back?

Like a fish

Flipping flapping

like a bass

and twisting my toes under my ass?

A call from the mat!…

Please!

a discount on my taxes as I

Inhale, Exhale

Slow then fast,

ignore the guy with gas..

but please pass that water miss…

caught the gist

in my neck

at the twist of a thigh,

Try one more time

to just Breathe,

Relax

Unwind …

We’re right on time

for another bind,

feet in line…

“Be kind to your knees and shoulders, dear yogisâ€

Says the teacher

and please stretch your thoughts and toes in every pose,

As we go once more to down dog,

Breathe deep in through your nose,

You just know….

PEACE

as you breathe out in a flow

slowly

drag that mat against the wall

reaching tall

on your head for a cushion

pushin! up to down dog

eliminate the brain fog

with a hop into frog

...ouch!

I’m a cow!

then a cat!

Sat in boat

Then float

to an updog,

never a showdog though,

Blow off those thoughts!,

And connect the dots

in the heart.

the heat in the skin

sweats

and

starts the beat pounding

in eyes of the heart

“impart love and wisdom

til you’re dizzy…â€

she says,

and

“Breathe like your busyâ€

Dizzy,

I felt like I was gonna throw up for a minute

but it passed,

then I laughed!

as I went upside down in plow,

WOW!

My mind wanders…

wonders about

The Tao, The Way

Im allowed to stretch my mind a little,

spine a little…

uncrackle the brittle

the back and neck unwind a little

and those hamstrings a lot too!

Whoo!,

just got a clue

about something going on

deep down

in those thighs…,

who knew?

Was I wrong to try?

To pry the lies from my mind?

oh my!

what I was holding on to!

for nothing,

but

my ego

gets in the way of me at times

like these poses sometimes seem

to lean to the obscene,

glancing sideways

to watch thy neighbors ways,

but distraction doesn’t pay,

dreams of getting paid lead into

fantasies of getting laid

fade to focus on the ways meditation makes my mind high

like a white flying object

up in the sky

and lights up the dark parts

of my mind.

And soul…

Still I find,

I get in the way of me sometimes

with these poses

like the IRS,

Federal Reserve posers

pulling harassing holds

and notes to pay up

and debts to pay down…

I forget

as I go upside down again in handstand

Landing safely in a backbend

Not pretending

Not lending or sending 1/3 of my check

to the Federal Reserve

who didn’t earn

and doesn’t deserve

instead

I learn how to serve,

Love

and

sign my name in table,

letting go of the fables

maybe wobbly

yet still

grateful,

I’m present

and still able to handle

these challenging situations,

asanas on prana

with positive vibrations..

with grace, gratitude, happiness

bliss

so I owe it to myself,

and not the IRS,

so “YESâ€, ms. yoga master says,

“you may write this class off on your taxes!â€

Ava Bird

is a poet, writer, artist and photographer who flies in Los Angeles and

Berkeley, California. Currently, she is having a love affair with mother earth and loves her beaches, mysterious forests, mountains and rolling hills, offspring, fresh oxygen and green grass! She is thankful for local, organic sustainable agriculture, bees and their honey and the vibrant artistic culture of LA and the bay area.

ava bird obsessively writes poetry, tries to publish it, and produces

art shows wherever she can. Presently, her artwork is featured in a show entitled ‘EROS’ @ 2905 Shattuck Av Berkeley, a mixed media erotic roller coaster collage, until spring 2011.

she creates raw food bliss treats for those that dare to fly high Email her: ompoem AT hotmail DOT com.

Her new book of activist writings ‘rage against the war machine’ will

be released by beatitude press (Berkeley, CA) really soon!

ArhataOsho.com