I'm Baaaack

[Guest guest]

Glad to hear from you Leigh, and hear the baby news. You have quite a plantation to hoe!!!! You are just the woman for the job!!

Love, Lee

& Leigh McKnight <blmcknight@...> wrote:

Okay, first let me say that I missed all of you!!!! A lot more people have joined our group while I was "out" of it! Hello to all of the new comers and I am thrilled that you found us!!! We must get to know each other! For the ones that do know me, I would like to apoligize.I realize I have been selfish. I am sorry. How are all you doing??Please tell me and don't leave anything out! Geesh, I've missed all of you.I have been "out" of it because I have left . I have the babies and we are living in an apartment closer to my parents. I can not believe they are 8 months old already!!! They are doing great. Xav. still watches out for his younger brother and sister. Blaize still has his quick temper. Alair. still has her temper too! I have my hands full here. Xav. and Blaize have two teeth!! Alair. just cut her first one the other day. That girl already knows how to use her tooth too...ouch!. Both of the boys are walking. They are so cute when they walk. They waddle like a duck. LOL Alair. is starting to walk. She walks, but she still looses her balance. She waddles more like a duck then her brothers do. I have a feeling she is going to be the child that does every last. Their health is wonderful. They miss their daddy though. knows where we are and he comes to take the babies a few times a week. It is always so hard when he comes. It is hard when he leaves. The angels cry and clentch on to him. starts getting teary. My eyes start running like waterfalls. Alair. has a favorite blankie that she has to sleep with. Now, she also has a picture of her daddy she has to sleep with too. It is so hard to believe they are 8 months old and they seem to understand. My college is almost over with. I have not done as well as I wanted too. :-( I am still working too. It is hard being on your own with three babies, going to college, and working! My health has been going up and down.I got a mysterious rash on my wrist a few months ago. It comes and goes. When it comes it itches like crazy and when it goes I have a brown mark where it was. I get it for a week, it fades for a week, i get it back for a week, etc. I also have one on my chin now. ARGH.This one burns and does not fade away. I have had this one for about a month now.Okay, I have a question for all of you. A few months ago I noticed a bump on my back. The bump is about a size of a watermelon seed. The bump is under the skin. No bump on the outside of the skin, but there is a really pale circle on my skin where the bump is. Any clues?I think I have covered everything. I have to go to work tonight and will be here soon to pick up the babies. Got to go and get them ready.Love,Leigh

[Guest guest]

Leigh,

Nice to hear from you again. We've really missed you a

lot. Please know that you and the babies are always in my

thoughts.

=====

Kristy

http://www.geocities.com/sokokl/kristyspersonalpage.html

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Welcome Back Leigh!!! Glad to hear from you! You must be exhausted.... &

with the babies...WOW!!! You sound like such a strong person.....hang on to

that strength....you're gonna need it for the terrible two's are

approaching.......Good luck! Love, Barb

I'm baaaack

Okay, first let me say that I missed all of you!!!! A lot more people have

joined our group while I was " out " of it! Hello to all of the new comers

and I am thrilled that you found us!!! We must get to know each other! For

the ones that do know me, I would like to apoligize.

I realize I have been selfish. I am sorry. How are all you doing??

Please tell me and don't leave anything out! Geesh, I've missed all of you.

I have been " out " of it because I have left . I have the babies and we

are living in an apartment closer to my parents. I can not believe they are

8 months old already!!! They are doing great. Xav. still watches out for

his younger brother and sister. Blaize still has his quick temper. Alair.

still has her temper too! I have my hands full here. Xav. and Blaize have

two teeth!! Alair. just cut her first one the other day. That girl already

knows how to use her tooth too...ouch!. Both of the boys are walking. They

are so cute when they walk. They waddle like a duck. LOL Alair. is

starting to walk. She walks, but she still looses her balance. She waddles

more like a duck then her brothers do. I have a feeling she is going to be

the child that does every last. Their health is wonderful. They miss their

daddy though. knows where we are and he comes to take the babies a

few times a week. It is always so hard when he comes. It is hard when he

leaves. The angels cry and clentch on to him. starts getting teary.

My eyes start running like waterfalls. Alair. has a favorite blankie that

she has to sleep with. Now, she also has a picture of her daddy she has to

sleep with too. It is so hard to believe they are 8 months old and they

seem to understand. My college is almost over with. I have not done as

well as I wanted too. :-( I am still working too. It is hard being on your

own with three babies, going to college, and working! My health has been

going up and down.

I got a mysterious rash on my wrist a few months ago. It comes and goes.

When it comes it itches like crazy and when it goes I have a brown mark

where it was. I get it for a week, it fades for a week, i get it back for a

week, etc. I also have one on my chin now. ARGH.

This one burns and does not fade away. I have had this one for about a

month now.

Okay, I have a question for all of you. A few months ago I noticed a bump

on my back. The bump is about a size of a watermelon seed. The bump is

under the skin. No bump on the outside of the skin, but there is a really

pale circle on my skin where the bump is. Any clues?

I think I have covered everything. I have to go to work tonight and

will be here soon to pick up the babies. Got to go and get them ready.

Love,

Leigh

_________________________________________________________________

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[Guest guest]

Hi All,

Just wanted to let you know that I've been thinking of you. Have not

posted for some time and have missed you. My update....had revision

surgery in Sept. Had my band replaced due to dilitation and severe

reflux. Since September and very little restriction I have gained back

15 lbs. Amazed at how my bad habits began to return and kept trying on

my own. Anyway, got my second fill on Friday and do believe I'm in

the " green " zone now.....AND LOVING IT. I'm just soooo greatful for my

band and for all of you. I have lost 3 of the 15 already and delighted

to be back to my bandster life. Hope you are all having a wonderful

holiday season so far.

Carol

[Guest guest]

Hi Sandy,

I'm holding on tight and trying to get back in the zone. My husband

has lost and regained about 20 since his surgery in June. He has

reduced the speed in which he eats, but I just notice that he'll sit

and wait a bit and try to finish whats on his plate. I've been

trying to encourage 1 cup servings, etc. He has an appt this month

and I think he needs just another cc or 2 to get to a good level.

Having this slump myself didn't help any either. None of us is good

for eachother in my house. My daughter is nearing 300 lbs now. Just

really struggling with it all. We will be seeing a nutritionist on

Mon that we hope is covered under insurance. She does menu planning,

etc. I told her that I'm really seeking family counseling for our

problem, so hopefully she'll help. Thank you so much for your

support.

Carol

> >

> > Hi All,

> > Just wanted to let you know that I've been thinking of you. Have

> not

> > posted for some time and have missed you. My update....had

> revision

> > surgery in Sept. Had my band replaced due to dilitation and

severe

> > reflux. Since September and very little restriction I have

gained

> back

> > 15 lbs. Amazed at how my bad habits began to return and kept

> trying on

> > my own. Anyway, got my second fill on Friday and do believe I'm

in

> > the " green " zone now.....AND LOVING IT. I'm just soooo greatful

> for my

> > band and for all of you. I have lost 3 of the 15 already and

> delighted

> > to be back to my bandster life. Hope you are all having a

> wonderful

> > holiday season so far.

> > Carol

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Hello mom1960cq,

Tuesday, December 4, 2007, 7:32:00 AM, you wrote:

> He has

> reduced the speed in which he eats, but I just notice that he'll sit

> and wait a bit and try to finish whats on his plate. I've been

> trying to encourage 1 cup servings, etc. He has an appt this month

> and I think he needs just another cc or 2 to get to a good level.

If it makes him feel any better, I still struggle with that too.

After all, I was brought up to be a Member of the Clean Plate Club at

all meals. After all, there were people that were " starving in

[country of the month] " so I'd better appreciate mine and clean my

plate. Or else. (Of course parents were brought up in depression

when food was even scarcer than it was in our poor family)

What Gail and I learned even BEFORE I was banded was to NEVER put the

serving bowl, pot, etc, on the table. Serve the food in the kitchen

and take the plate to table. Make sure the servings are appropriate

size when serving. If the pot of stuff is just sitting there in front

of you, you're much more likely to want to " just have a little more "

or to make yourself a first serving that is too large.

--

Best regards,

Dan mailto:honu@...

[Guest guest]

Hi Dan,

Very good tips. In the past we have tried making up plates

beforehand.....Here's what happened. Everyone at the table

immediately examined the amount on each plate and compared even the

slightest difference in portion. After wolfing down their meals,

people, my husband the biggest culprit, would get up and go to the

stove for plate number two. I even tried my best to cook only the

amount needed for all of us, which is extremely difficult for an

Italian who grew up cooking for at least 10 more people than

necessary. Fights would ensue and I got very frustrated. I

eventually gave up and started putting the bowls back on the table,

but did manage to continue to improve on learning to not make too

much. I have since " threatened " to start up plating again, but have

not followed through. I just find myself thanking God that my band

has taught me to only put that one cup serving on my plate to start.

Maybe its time to try again.

Thanks,

Carol

>

> > He has

> > reduced the speed in which he eats, but I just notice that he'll

sit

> > and wait a bit and try to finish whats on his plate. I've been

> > trying to encourage 1 cup servings, etc. He has an appt this

month

> > and I think he needs just another cc or 2 to get to a good level.

>

> If it makes him feel any better, I still struggle with that too.

> After all, I was brought up to be a Member of the Clean Plate Club

at

> all meals. After all, there were people that were " starving in

> [country of the month] " so I'd better appreciate mine and clean my

> plate. Or else. (Of course parents were brought up in depression

> when food was even scarcer than it was in our poor family)

>

> What Gail and I learned even BEFORE I was banded was to NEVER put

the

> serving bowl, pot, etc, on the table. Serve the food in the kitchen

> and take the plate to table. Make sure the servings are appropriate

> size when serving. If the pot of stuff is just sitting there in

front

> of you, you're much more likely to want to " just have a little more "

> or to make yourself a first serving that is too large.

>

> --

> Best regards,

> Dan mailto:honu@...

>

[Guest guest]

Hello mom1960cq,

Tuesday, December 4, 2007, 4:25:38 PM, you wrote:

> Very good tips. In the past we have tried making up plates

> beforehand.....Here's what happened. Everyone at the table

> immediately examined the amount on each plate and compared even the

> slightest difference in portion.

Weird. Little kids do that with " his piece of cake is bigger than

mine " and so forth, but seems strange to me that they're that way

about other food on plate. Is there an obesity issue with others than

your husband and you? And how old are they?

> After wolfing down their meals,

> people, my husband the biggest culprit, would get up and go to the

> stove for plate number two. I even tried my best to cook only the

> amount needed for all of us, which is extremely difficult for an

> Italian who grew up cooking for at least 10 more people than

> necessary.

Understand that. One of many habits that is hard to break, both for

you and for the family. We all learn that our banding DOES affect

other people and other people DO affect us and our band.

> Fights would ensue and I got very frustrated. I

> eventually gave up and started putting the bowls back on the table,

> but did manage to continue to improve on learning to not make too

That's good.

> much. I have since " threatened " to start up plating again, but have

> not followed through.

It is too bad that this turns into a threat (though understand it)

when we would hope it would be made something positive instead of

threatening.

> I just find myself thanking God that my band

> has taught me to only put that one cup serving on my plate to start.

> Maybe its time to try again.

Well, in all of this, remember that you can't control other people

(well, kids maybe when real little, and even then there are limits).

We can only fix ourselves, and if your husband is not committed to

making the changes necessary, all you can do is NOT NAG but provide a

positive example and do whatever things you can to encourage " good

band behavior " .

Hang in there.

--

Best regards,

Dan mailto:honu@...

[Guest guest]

There is an obesity issue with every one of us. Two parents, three

children. My oldest son was banded on the same day as me at 19 years

old. He has since lost around 80 and gained about 30 back. He has

no desire to have an adjustment at this point. He had some taken out

a few months back because he was too tight and now seems to be

enjoying the food once again. My daughter who is 13 is about 300 lbs

and my youngest, 8, has been gaining steadily. I am seeking

cognitive therepy at this point, but just want to have it covered

under insurance. Its a shame that help can not be provided to people

with weight problems without having them pay so much for it. We are

not the kind of people who eat 10 cheeseburgers a day and I have been

the one to set the standard for trying to eat right in the house. It

has been tremendously hard for me and I'm running out of strength

now. Dealing with my own problem and trying to drag everyone along

with me is exhausting. Anyway, you are right Dan. I need to

concentrate on being a good example and work on getting myself

right. Somehow it seems that I feel like I'm seperating myself from

them when I do that, but I guess thats how it has to be. Thank you

so much for you insight.

Carol

>

> > Very good tips. In the past we have tried making up plates

> > beforehand.....Here's what happened. Everyone at the table

> > immediately examined the amount on each plate and compared even

the

> > slightest difference in portion.

>

> Weird. Little kids do that with " his piece of cake is bigger than

> mine " and so forth, but seems strange to me that they're that way

> about other food on plate. Is there an obesity issue with others

than

> your husband and you? And how old are they?

>

> > After wolfing down their meals,

> > people, my husband the biggest culprit, would get up and go to

the

> > stove for plate number two. I even tried my best to cook only

the

> > amount needed for all of us, which is extremely difficult for an

> > Italian who grew up cooking for at least 10 more people than

> > necessary.

>

> Understand that. One of many habits that is hard to break, both for

> you and for the family. We all learn that our banding DOES affect

> other people and other people DO affect us and our band.

>

> > Fights would ensue and I got very frustrated. I

> > eventually gave up and started putting the bowls back on the

table,

> > but did manage to continue to improve on learning to not make too

>

> That's good.

>

> > much. I have since " threatened " to start up plating again, but

have

> > not followed through.

>

> It is too bad that this turns into a threat (though understand it)

> when we would hope it would be made something positive instead of

> threatening.

>

> > I just find myself thanking God that my band

> > has taught me to only put that one cup serving on my plate to

start.

> > Maybe its time to try again.

>

> Well, in all of this, remember that you can't control other people

> (well, kids maybe when real little, and even then there are limits).

> We can only fix ourselves, and if your husband is not committed to

> making the changes necessary, all you can do is NOT NAG but provide

a

> positive example and do whatever things you can to encourage " good

> band behavior " .

>

> Hang in there.

> --

> Best regards,

> Dan mailto:honu@...

>

[Guest guest]

hi Mom,

you certainly have your hands full. first off, i believe you and

your husband must face together what is a family epidemic. he must

join your team for the welfare of the family. i'm sure if a

policeman were watching him at all times for overeating, he'd control

himself. not that you should take that role. i mention it because i

believe most people can choose to change their behavior. certainly

if fear of arrest will stop him, then we know he can stop and resist

temptation for the well-being of his children. if he won't cooperate

on that basis, then your problem is more serious.

with respect to your 19 year old, you can merely be the leader. you

can't force his behavior, unless you want to give him the pink slip

on his life. which would mean that he get a fill and get back on

board or find his own place to live with all the responsibility that

goes with it.

with respect to your 13 and 8 year olds. you must get them into some

form of therapy and keep all junk food out of the house. they have a

serious problem which will become life threatening. 13 and 300

pounds may become 500 or 600. you must put the brakes on immediately.

what have you tried so far with the two younger kids? and let's hear

what your husband has to say after you lay down the law. you

shouldn't have to do this all yourself.

best of luck and please keep us apprised of new developments.

george

> >

> > > Very good tips. In the past we have tried making up plates

> > > beforehand.....Here's what happened. Everyone at the table

> > > immediately examined the amount on each plate and compared even

> the

> > > slightest difference in portion.

> >

> > Weird. Little kids do that with " his piece of cake is bigger than

> > mine " and so forth, but seems strange to me that they're that way

> > about other food on plate. Is there an obesity issue with others

> than

> > your husband and you? And how old are they?

> >

> > > After wolfing down their meals,

> > > people, my husband the biggest culprit, would get up and go to

> the

> > > stove for plate number two. I even tried my best to cook only

> the

> > > amount needed for all of us, which is extremely difficult for

an

> > > Italian who grew up cooking for at least 10 more people than

> > > necessary.

> >

> > Understand that. One of many habits that is hard to break, both

for

> > you and for the family. We all learn that our banding DOES affect

> > other people and other people DO affect us and our band.

> >

> > > Fights would ensue and I got very frustrated. I

> > > eventually gave up and started putting the bowls back on the

> table,

> > > but did manage to continue to improve on learning to not make

too

> >

> > That's good.

> >

> > > much. I have since " threatened " to start up plating again, but

> have

> > > not followed through.

> >

> > It is too bad that this turns into a threat (though understand it)

> > when we would hope it would be made something positive instead of

> > threatening.

> >

> > > I just find myself thanking God that my band

> > > has taught me to only put that one cup serving on my plate to

> start.

> > > Maybe its time to try again.

> >

> > Well, in all of this, remember that you can't control other people

> > (well, kids maybe when real little, and even then there are

limits).

> > We can only fix ourselves, and if your husband is not committed to

> > making the changes necessary, all you can do is NOT NAG but

provide

> a

> > positive example and do whatever things you can to encourage " good

> > band behavior " .

> >

> > Hang in there.

> > --

> > Best regards,

> > Dan mailto:honu@

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Hello george,

Some agreement, some disagreement. See below.

Sunday, December 9, 2007, 6:29:40 AM, you wrote:

> you certainly have your hands full. first off, i believe you and

> your husband must face together what is a family epidemic.

Epidemic, I guess so. But it isn't " catching " as much as it is

" learned " . Much obesity has a genetic component, but almost none is

completely genetic. In general fat people marry fat people (same as

thin, tall, short, race, religion, etc, etc).

Most of us LEARNED how to eat the way we did (or in these cases still

do). For some of us old geezers it was eating whatever we could

because there wasn't much to eat, or being told to " clean your plate

they're starving in India " or similar. Our parents grew up in

depression when many were literally starving.

> he must

> join your team for the welfare of the family. i'm sure if a

> policeman were watching him at all times for overeating, he'd control

> himself.

I don't necessarily agree with that. People " under supervision " then

get into sneaking food. Many of us have been in situations where

someone (parent, spouse, etc) was trying to " change our behavior " .

What did we do? We did it anyway, we sneaked around, we cheated, we

lied, etc. We were in denial of having a problem. We didn't want to

fix it, so we didn't. Think of those who get multiple DUIs, who are

addicts to OTHER drugs than food (meth, booze, smokes, etc). Don't we

all know people who sneak food, sneak a smoke, sneak out to cheat on a

spouse, etc? And those people are generally under guard of some sort.

Hell, people sneak that stuff into prisons.....

> not that you should take that role. i mention it because i

> believe most people can choose to change their behavior.

The can, IF THEY WANT TO. If they're in denial (as I used to be with

both booze and food), then they don't want to....because they don't

have a problem. Or they don't care. If they die of their addiction,

they don't care. For some it is literally a form of suicide.

> certainly

> if fear of arrest will stop him, then we know he can stop and resist

> temptation for the well-being of his children. if he won't cooperate

> on that basis, then your problem is more serious.

Well, remember talking the talk and walking the walk are not the same

thing.

> with respect to your 19 year old, you can merely be the leader. you

> can't force his behavior, unless you want to give him the pink slip

> on his life. which would mean that he get a fill and get back on

> board or find his own place to live with all the responsibility that

> goes with it.

That's an option, but I'd quit doing all sorts of other enabling

first.

> with respect to your 13 and 8 year olds. you must get them into some

> form of therapy and keep all junk food out of the house. they have a

> serious problem which will become life threatening. 13 and 300

> pounds may become 500 or 600. you must put the brakes on immediately.

You can indeed have only good food around, and that may help.

However, the addict will ALWAYS find a way to get the drug of choice,

whether it is crystal or chocolate. It can be harder for them if you

don't have the stuff in the house, but you can't stop them from

hitting the convenience store, the vending machines at school, etc.

And the ways we find to " get our drug " can be very creative. I have a

niece, now in her late 20s and an RN serving in hospice care. But

when she was 13 to 16 she was hooked on booze and meth. Her family

was, and is, poor, and she wouldn't think of stealing from her

parents, since they had so little, she has a multiply handicapped

brother, etc. She had too much personal honor and family respect to

do that. So what did she do? She used her body to get drugs....and

did so for three years.

So...what's the answer? See if you can get some counseling for any

and all....keep the crap out of the house....and quit enabling by

having bad food in the house or doing any other things like that.

--

Best regards,

Dan mailto:honu@...

[Guest guest]

Hello mom1960cq,

Saturday, December 8, 2007, 9:53:46 AM, you wrote:

> We are

> not the kind of people who eat 10 cheeseburgers a day and I have been

> the one to set the standard for trying to eat right in the house.

Remember, you can eat right yourself. Don't lecture or nag anyone.

> It

> has been tremendously hard for me and I'm running out of strength

> now. Dealing with my own problem and trying to drag everyone along

> with me is exhausting.

So quit dragging them. They MUST do it themselves.

> Anyway, you are right Dan. I need to

> concentrate on being a good example and work on getting myself

> right. Somehow it seems that I feel like I'm seperating myself from

> them when I do that, but I guess thats how it has to be. Thank you

> so much for you insight.

Yes, you may separate yourself from them, but you can set the good

example, and you can NEVER ENABLE. If they complain about the good

healthy meals you prepare, remind them they can cook their own damn

food and by their won damn food. You may choose to be more polite

than that. But if what you serve is what there is that you've bought

and cooked, then they're on their own for the rest. Say " sorry,

that's all I'm able to buy and cook " . End of story.

It will be VERY hard. Really hard. But by taking care of yourself

and not enabling them, they'll have a somewhat better chance of making

it.

dan

--

Best regards,

Dan mailto:honu@...

[Guest guest]

Hey ! Welcome back! I really like the first name, Libris Soap Co. It's

got a nice ring to it, it's short, easily memorable, and easy to pronounce.

I also think your concept is a great marketing grab. Good luck & keep us

updated on your progress.

Colleen

http://www.countrymeadowcreations.com