Re: Some thoughts on depression and willpower

[Guest guest]

Ugh, sorry about the formatting there. I copied & pasted it from a Word doc=

.. Let me see if I can

clean it up. If not, sorry, I know it's hard on the eyes!!

>

>

>

> Okay, another very long-winded post from the Analogy Queen. I know…ugh. B=

ut

> bear with me.

>

> I'm seeing a lot here about how people are told they should be able to " w=

ill " themselves out

of their depression. I wonder what people think " willpower " really is in th=

at case. Who has more

> willpower than a depressed person? We have a condition that we have to li=

ve with every

day.

> We wake up in the morning thinking, " I'd rather die than have to face thi=

s day… " but we get up,

> get dressed, go to work. We have anxiety…but that doesn't buy us a ticket=

out of that

important company meeting at which we've been asked to speak. We stand in f=

ront of our

co-workers with waves of terror and/or profound futility, " acting normal " r=

egardless.

>

>

> Our depression doesn't allow us not to take care of our children. When we=

want to lie down

and sleep from the fatigue of our meds…we can't. Our infants or two-year-o=

lds or five-year-olds

> aren't going to go into suspended animation while we take the time to rec=

over. We have to

get up…do the laundry…feed them…all the while feeling like we wish we could=

die. That's not

> willpower????

>

> Maybe we have OCD. In that case it can take us ten times the amount of ti=

me it takes the

> " average " person to drive to the supermarket…pay a bill…turn on a lightsw=

itch. We force

> ourselves to get things done anyway…even when every single action is a ch=

ore. We do it.

We get it done. No willpower? My ass.

>

> If depression were a matter of simply " willing it away " …nobody would be a=

ble to do it better

> and faster than those of us here. I only WISH it were a matter of willpow=

er. Then none of us

> would be here on this board. If there's any group that are masters of for=

cing ourselves to get

> along in the world despite endless pain and suffering…it's us.

>

> I'd love to do a little experiment with a person who " poo-poos " depressio=

n.

> I'd love to wait until that person runs into a physical issue (as we're =

all bound to off and on

throughout life). Say the person suffers chronic back pain. Well now that's=

PHYSICAL, isn't it?

Not like depression. Okay…I'd love to follow that person around through =

her day. When she

says, " I can't keep

> walking…I have to sit down…my poor back, " I'd say, " GET UP! What's the ma=

tter with you?

> Everybody ELSE around here is walking. It's all in your head. Have you no=

willpower? "

When the person said, " It hurts so bad…please can I have a Tylenol? " I'd sa=

y, " Wellllll, if you

really HAVE to resort to drugging yourself rather than working through this=

on your own, I

suppose so…but I can't say I approve. Can't you just tough it out? "

When the person gets up in the morning, I'd be there to say, " What do you m=

ean, you'd rather

stay home from work? With THIS flimsy excuse? Are you trying to get yoursel=

f fired? Well,

okay, if you'd rather get fired and not be able to provide for your family =

anymore, when they all

leave youbecause you're not supporting them, don't come crying to me. "

At the end of this gruelling day, the woman gets home and says, " I just wan=

t to lie

down…please…I've been suffering ALL day (okay lady, try ALL YOUR LIFE on fo=

r size) " , I'd

be right there to sneer, " Sure…you can lie down instead of spending time wi=

th your children.

They're only young once…but no big deal. Just because you're not there for =

them, do you

really think they'll be sad? HEY, what are you doing…are you reaching for t=

hose DRUGS

again? You're just so weak! "

>

> I don't mean to sound harsh…but I get so sick of the Medieval stigma atta=

ched to depression.

> " It's all in your head. " So was Alzheimer's at one time. So was PMS. I wi=

sh

> we could move out

> of the Dark Ages already and stop making people suffer both mentally and =

physically all the

> while telling them they're " weak " if they have to " resort to " drugs.

>

> I hope I don't sound like a freak…just wanted to get this off my chest…th=

anks for listening.

[Guest guest]

> Ugh, sorry about the formatting there. I copied & pasted it from a

Word doc=

> . Let me see if I can

> clean it up. If not, sorry, I know it's hard on the eyes!!

You forget who you are speaking to ;o) ! We are a willful group ;o) !

We can handle it !

;o) Cath

[Guest guest]

LOL !!!!!!!!!!

You sound good today, Cath! You're cracking me up.

>

>

> ;o) Cath

[Guest guest]

> I'm seeing a lot here about how people are told they should be able

to " wil=

> l " themselves out of

My poor granny heard this day in and out from her sons.

" Pull yourself together! "

[Guest guest]

> No willpower? My ass.

I think I am going to have that printed on a T shirt ;o) !

[Guest guest]

> You sound good today, Cath! You're cracking me up.

) Yup " I " am back ;o) !

Really good timing too as this weekend a little girl is visiting us.

She is 6 years old. The 2nd cousin of my children and her mom passed

away 2 months ago. We really want to make her a close part of our

family - spend weekends and vacations and such because her father is

now alone with 2 children. Her and her handicapped brother and has no

other family. And I really want to be 100 % awake and alive when she

is here.

[Guest guest]

I know what you mean. I get ignorant attitudes from people regarding both

depression and blindness. Fun, fun fun--not.

Thea

Some thoughts on depression and " willpower "

Okay, another very long-winded post from the Analogy Queen. I know.ugh. But=

bear with me.

I'm seeing a lot here about how people are told they should be able to " wil=

l " themselves out of

their depression. I wonder what people think " willpower " really is in that =

case. Who has more

willpower than a depressed person? We have a condition that we have to live=

with every day.

We wake up in the morning thinking, " I'd rather die than have to face this =

day. " but we get up,

get dressed, go to work. We have anxiety.but that doesn't buy us a ticket o=

ut of that important

company meeting at which we've been asked to speak. We stand in front of ou=

r co-workers

with waves of terror and/or profound futility, " acting normal " regardless. =

Our depression doesn't allow us not to take care of our children. When we w=

ant to lie down and

sleep from the fatigue of our meds.we can't. Our infants or two-year-olds =

or five-year-olds

aren't going to go into suspended animation while we take the time to recov=

er. We have to get

up.do the laundry.feed them.all the while feeling like we wish we could die=

.. That's not

willpower????

Maybe we have OCD. In that case it can take us ten times the amount of time=

it takes the

" average " person to drive to the supermarket.pay a bill.turn on a lightswit=

ch. We force

ourselves to get things done anyway.even when every single action is a chor=

e. We do it. We

get it done. No willpower? My ass.

If depression were a matter of simply " willing it away " .nobody would be abl=

e to do it better

and faster than those of us here. I only WISH it were a matter of willpower=

.. Then none of us

would be here on this board. If there's any group that are masters of forci=

ng ourselves to get

along in the world despite endless pain and suffering.it's us.

I'd love to do a little experiment with a person who " poo-poos " depression.=

I'd love to wait until

that person runs into a physical issue (as we're all bound to off and on th=

roughout life). Say the

person suffers chronic back pain. Well now that's PHYSICAL, isn't it? Not l=

ike depression. J

Okay.I'd love to follow that person around through her day. When she says, =

" I can't keep

walking.I have to sit down.my poor back, " I'd say, " GET UP! What's the matt=

er with you?

Everybody ELSE around here is walking. It's all in your head. Have you no w=

illpower? " When

the person said, " It hurts so bad.please can I have a Tylenol? " I'd say, " W=

ellllll, if you really

HAVE to resort to drugging yourself rather than working through this on you=

r own, I suppose

so.but I can't say I approve. Can't you just tough it out? " When the person=

gets up in the

morning, I'd be there to say, " What do you mean, you'd rather stay home fro=

m work? With

THIS flimsy excuse? Are you trying to get yourself fired? Well, okay, if yo=

u'd rather get fired

and not be able to provide for your family anymore, when they all leave you=

because you're

not supporting them, don't come crying to me. " At the end of this gruelling=

day, the woman gets

home and says, " I just want to lie down.please.I've been suffering ALL day =

(okay lady, try

ALL YOUR LIFE on for size) " , I'd be right there to sneer, " Sure.you can lie=

down instead of

spending time with your children. They're only young once.but no big deal. =

Just because

you're not there for them, do you really think they'll be sad? HEY, what ar=

e you doing.are you

reaching for those DRUGS again? You're just so weak! "

I don't mean to sound harsh.but I get so sick of the Medieval stigma attach=

ed to depression.

" It's all in your head. " So was Alzheimer's at one time. So was PMS. I wish=

we could move out

of the Dark Ages already and stop making people suffer both mentally and ph=

ysically all the

while telling them they're " weak " if they have to " resort to " drugs.

I hope I don't sound like a freak.just wanted to get this off my chest.than=

ks for listening.

[Guest guest]

Cathrine, sounds wonderful. My own little girl is six--soon to be seven.

Have a great time and glad to see you feeling better.

Thea

Re: Some thoughts on depression and " willpower "

>

> > You sound good today, Cath! You're cracking me up.

>

>

> ) Yup " I " am back ;o) !

>

> Really good timing too as this weekend a little girl is visiting us.

> She is 6 years old. The 2nd cousin of my children and her mom passed

> away 2 months ago. We really want to make her a close part of our

> family - spend weekends and vacations and such because her father is

> now alone with 2 children. Her and her handicapped brother and has no

> other family. And I really want to be 100 % awake and alive when she

> is here.

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Thea ~ ~ Standing up and applauding you. Well written !!!!!!!!

Dana Rose

> I know what you mean. I get ignorant attitudes from people

regarding both

> depression and blindness. Fun, fun fun--not.

> Thea

> Some thoughts on depression and " willpower "

>

>

>

>

>

> Okay, another very long-winded post from the Analogy Queen. I

know.ugh. But=

> bear with me.

>

> I'm seeing a lot here about how people are told they should be able

to " wil=

> l " themselves out of

> their depression. I wonder what people think " willpower " really is

in that =

> case. Who has more

> willpower than a depressed person? We have a condition that we have

to live=

> with every day.

> We wake up in the morning thinking, " I'd rather die than have to

face this =

> day. " but we get up,

> get dressed, go to work. We have anxiety.but that doesn't buy us a

ticket o=

> ut of that important

> company meeting at which we've been asked to speak. We stand in

front of ou=

> r co-workers

> with waves of terror and/or profound futility, " acting normal "

regardless. =

>

>

> Our depression doesn't allow us not to take care of our children.

When we w=

> ant to lie down and

> sleep from the fatigue of our meds.we can't. Our infants or two-

year-olds =

> or five-year-olds

> aren't going to go into suspended animation while we take the time

to recov=

> er. We have to get

> up.do the laundry.feed them.all the while feeling like we wish we

could die=

> . That's not

> willpower????

>

> Maybe we have OCD. In that case it can take us ten times the amount

of time=

> it takes the

> " average " person to drive to the supermarket.pay a bill.turn on a

lightswit=

> ch. We force

> ourselves to get things done anyway.even when every single action

is a chor=

> e. We do it. We

> get it done. No willpower? My ass.

>

> If depression were a matter of simply " willing it away " .nobody

would be abl=

> e to do it better

> and faster than those of us here. I only WISH it were a matter of

willpower=

> . Then none of us

> would be here on this board. If there's any group that are masters

of forci=

> ng ourselves to get

> along in the world despite endless pain and suffering.it's us.

>

> I'd love to do a little experiment with a person who " poo-poos "

depression.=

> I'd love to wait until

> that person runs into a physical issue (as we're all bound to off

and on th=

> roughout life). Say the

> person suffers chronic back pain. Well now that's PHYSICAL, isn't

it? Not l=

> ike depression. J

> Okay.I'd love to follow that person around through her day. When

she says, =

> " I can't keep

> walking.I have to sit down.my poor back, " I'd say, " GET UP! What's

the matt=

> er with you?

> Everybody ELSE around here is walking. It's all in your head. Have

you no w=

> illpower? " When

> the person said, " It hurts so bad.please can I have a Tylenol? " I'd

say, " W=

> ellllll, if you really

> HAVE to resort to drugging yourself rather than working through

this on you=

> r own, I suppose

> so.but I can't say I approve. Can't you just tough it out? " When

the person=

> gets up in the

> morning, I'd be there to say, " What do you mean, you'd rather stay

home fro=

> m work? With

> THIS flimsy excuse? Are you trying to get yourself fired? Well,

okay, if yo=

> u'd rather get fired

> and not be able to provide for your family anymore, when they all

leave you=

> because you're

> not supporting them, don't come crying to me. " At the end of this

gruelling=

> day, the woman gets

> home and says, " I just want to lie down.please.I've been suffering

ALL day =

> (okay lady, try

> ALL YOUR LIFE on for size) " , I'd be right there to sneer, " Sure.you

can lie=

> down instead of

> spending time with your children. They're only young once.but no

big deal. =

> Just because

> you're not there for them, do you really think they'll be sad? HEY,

what ar=

> e you doing.are you

> reaching for those DRUGS again? You're just so weak! "

>

> I don't mean to sound harsh.but I get so sick of the Medieval

stigma attach=

> ed to depression.

> " It's all in your head. " So was Alzheimer's at one time. So was

PMS. I wish=

> we could move out

> of the Dark Ages already and stop making people suffer both

mentally and ph=

> ysically all the

> while telling them they're " weak " if they have to " resort to " drugs.

>

> I hope I don't sound like a freak.just wanted to get this off my

chest.than=

> ks for listening.

>

>

>

>

>

>

>