Goal free living

[Guest guest]

[sorry, Dayu, but this is the right list for this, I feel.]

Yours, Eolake

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http://www.goalfree.com

THE GOAL-FREE LIVING NEWSLETTER

Stories, Inspiration, Ideas, and News.

Go to www.goalfree.com for more stories

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IN THIS ISSUE

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101 Great Ways to Improve Your Life

GFL Quote of the Month

GFL News and Special Offers

GFL Fun (we saved the best for last)

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------ 101 Great Ways to Improve Your Life ------

This month's newsletter features an article that will be appearing

in an upcoming book entitled, " 101 Great Ways to Improve Your

Life. " It is a compilation of articles on self-improvement by

authors such as Zig Ziglar, Jim Rohn, Denis Waitley, ,

and yours truly. You are the first ones to read this article.

Goal-Free Living

Shapiro

Success and happiness are unarguably our Holy Grails, but the

standards taught to find them are all wrong. We have been

brainwashed into believing that the only way to achieve this

elusive combination of success and happiness is through setting

goals. This is simply not true. In fact, goal-setting is often the

shortest route to discontentment. Fifty eight percent of those I

surveyed say that they are consciously sacrificing today's

happiness in the belief that achieving their goals will bring

fulfillment. Sadly, 41 percent say that each goal achieved brings

little, if any, satisfaction, despite all the hard work. So, what

do they do? They set another goal. This creates a perpetual cycle

of sacrifice and disillusionment. What is the solution?

After interviewing hundreds of people and surveying thousands I

discovered that the most passionate, creative, and sometimes

wealthiest people live free from the burden of traditional goals.

Instead, they have mastered the rare skill of enjoying " now " rather

than delaying gratification until the future.

Goals are not inherently bad, but many individuals have an

unhealthy relationship with their goals, distorting this

potentially helpful tool into a surefire recipe for failure. Why?

- Quite often, the goals we chase are not our own. Fifty three

percent of those I surveyed feel that they are living their lives

in a way that satisfies others more than themselves. Whose life are

you living?

- Goals can cause you to lose your peripheral vision. When you

focus on your goals, you are cutting off potentially greater

opportunities from emerging.

- Goals set you up for failure, say 74 percent of those surveyed,

conceding to disappointment and dissatisfaction when they are

unsuccessful in achieving their goals. In fact, 92 percent fail to

achieve their New Year's resolutions. That is a lot of

discontentment.

Goal-Free Living is liberating. It opens new possibilities

typically hidden from sight.

We often associate goals with our career. While that is a big

aspect of our lives, Goal-Free Living applies to all areas of life,

from dating to business.

- Dating. When you are on a date, do not worry about the next date.

Instead, just enjoy the other person's company . . . for that

moment. You will come across as being more genuine and less

desperate, and ironically, this increases your chances of getting

that second date.

- Vacationing. When on a vacation, instead of planning every minute

of every day, try venturing out into an area not in your guidebook.

You may discover some hidden gems. You will feel less hurried and

more relaxed. Isn't that what a vacation is all about?

- Meetings. When you attend a business conference, stop focusing on

what you will get out of it and how you will use it. Rather,

concentrate on just being there and soaking in as much as possible.

Incredible opportunities show up when you are unburdened and

blinded by myopic goals.

When you are doing something, ask yourself " Why am I doing this? "

If you have a reason--other than just to be there--then you may have

a goal. While is it quite acceptable to have a particular interest

in an outcome, do not let that specific focus become so dominant

that it blinds you to other opportunities.

How does one embark on a more goal-free life? During my travels

around the world and after hundreds of interviews I discovered

eight secrets for living goal-free.

1. Use a compass, not a map--have a sense of direction (not a

specific destination), and then " meander with purpose. "

2. Trust that you are never lost--every seemingly wrong turn is an

opportunity to learn and experience new things.

3. Remember that opportunity knocks often but sometimes

softly--while blindly pursuing our goals, we often miss unexpected

and wonderful possibilities.

4. Want what you have--measure your life by your own yardstick and

appreciate who you are, what you do, and what you have . . . now.

5. Seek out adventure--treat your life like a one-time-only journey,

and revel in new and different experiences.

6. Become a people magnet--constantly attract, build, and nurture

relationships with new people so that you always have the support

and camaraderie of others.

7. Embrace your limits--transform your inadequacies and boundaries

into unique qualities that you can use to your advantage.

8. Remain detached--focus on the present, act with a commitment to

the future, and avoid worrying about how things will turn out.

For each of these secrets, there are a number of tips for

implementing the concept. Here are a few you can try today.

- Set " themes, " not " resolutions " --rather than set a resolution

(i.e., a goal), choose one word to describe your next year. Choose

something that is bold and inspires you. Instead of losing 10

pounds, you could choose " health. " " Relationships " --in the broadest

sense--may work better for you than " finding a boyfriend. " Any word

will do: " grace, " " adventure, " " serenity, " " play. "

- Use " could do " lists rather than " to do " lists-- " to do " lists tend

to be draining as they are the things you feel you must do. " Could

do " lists contain those things that you want to do that inspire

you. They keep possibility in front of you. Keep your list of

" could do " items large and your list of " to do " items small.

- Change your filter. One creative way to " seek out adventure " is

to make believe you are another person--an artist, a musician, or a

doctor. It doesn't matter, as long as it is someone other than you.

When you live your normal day standing in the shoes of someone

else, you will see things you have never seen before.

- Appreciate the whole spectrum of life. Create contrasts to help

you appreciate where you are right now. Sleep in a tent and

sleeping bag versus always staying in a five-star hotel. Volunteer

for a charity. Take the bus to work. Eat at a greasy spoon diner.

Swap jobs with someone with a less glamorous assignment for a week.

Experience the whole spectrum of life.

The origin of the word " goal " comes from the Old English word for

" obstacles " or " a hindrance. " In order to achieve a goal, you must

work hard to overcome these barriers and roadblocks. Conversely,

the origin of the word " aspiration " is the same as the Latin word

for " spirit " and " inspire, " which means " to breathe into " or

" panting with desire. " Barriers or inspiration. Which would you

prefer?

------------ GFL QUOTE OF THE MONTH ------------

" I jump into experiences for the experience, not the end result. "

A Georgia State University Business School student I met during my

cross-country travels.

------------ GFL NEWS AND SPECIAL OFFERS ------------

TIVO ALERT: I will be appearing on The Daily Buzz, a nationally

syndicated morning TV show, March 16th at 8:20AM EST. Go to

http://www.dailybuzz.tv for more about the show and a list of local

channels.

Goal-Free Living was featured on the front page of the March 12

Chicago Tribune career section. Go to http://tinyurl.com/f6bj5 to

view the article.

The Goal-Freedom tour continues. You can find my travel

schedule at http://www.goalfree.com/?page_id=61

Did you read Goal-Free Living and want to deepen your learning? If

so, then download our Discussion Guide at no cost. For more

details, go to http://www.goalfree.com/?page_id=164

If you read the book, please consider writing a review on

Amazon.com. Although I prefer positive reviews (of

course), I am more interested in honest, well thought out feedback.

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0471772801/247innovat-20

------------ GFL FUN ------------

The sad story of a little boy's aspirations...squashed.

Son: When I grow up, I want to be a musician.

Father: I'm sorry, you can't have it both ways.

2001 Marina Drive #807, Quincy, MA 02171, USA

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