Re: body image

[Guest guest]

I feel the same way. I am SHOCKED when we are in a normal type store (that

runs to sizes that actually fit me) and my friend will say " That would fit

you and look great " and I think " ME? No way " and she is right!

I feel so bad about my tummy....it is so flabby and THERE. It makes me wear

bigger sizes and feel just as fat as ever. I HATE HER! GUTZILLA GO AWAY

(can you tell it is the first day of my monthly yet? HAHA).

I want it cut off NOW but I know it is too soon, but I am thinking at my

year, she's DUST...OUTTA HERE....OFFA ME! That will be my birthday gift to

myself! (My year is 3-8 my bday is 3-5).

I'm not crazy about my batwings, but I wear tank tops to work out in and sun

dresses out in public. Some of my preop friends say I have great arms....I

don't I just have LESS arms, but hey, if they think they look okay, I figure

they DO...BUT the more I lose, the more i see flappin in the wind....I won't

have them done, because they don't upset me...but the tummy makes me wanna

cry. Anyone heard the saying " making love with a beautiful woman is this:

She lies there with her mouth open, you are just glad to be there " (terrible

saying, sorry) well that is my tummy....my big ol belly button is like a

mouth in amazement...like " O MY YOUR TUMMY IS HUGE " all day long!

I am so thrilled to be going to the picnic, but then I think Gutzilla is

coming too and I am embarrassed of how big around we are! HAHA...I guess if I

can take her anywhere, it's there though, right?

HUGS

in Ark

(and Gutzilla, the incredible non shrinking tummy)

[Guest guest]

LOL Okay just so she is in good company! HAHA

HUGS

in Ark

SOON TO BE IN NC and now on CLOUD 9

[Guest guest]

Gutzilla is very welcome at the picnic. Her cousins will all be there for sure.

Buttzilla is coming with me and will be visiting some of her cousins.

Flo who's bringing Buttzila

[Guest guest]

Hi Manda,

It's amazing isn't it and it gets more exciting. Attitudes towards

you will increasingly change. It won't be long and you will look in

that mirror and you will think you had a brain transplant into another

body. You will look at her and turn sideways and look and you will

see this woman. Yes, you know it is you, but then again.. you look and

you look. When you pass a window and you see yourself, you will stop

and look as if you were seeing.. well yes it's me but..... very very

interesting.

aW

> > Ditto on the image problems for me! It is very hard for others to

> > understand that I comprehend that I am smaller and when I look in

> the mirror

> > dressed feel like I look pretty good (most of the time). However,

> undressed

> > is an entirely other issue. My body " type " hasn't changed after

> all - the

> > folds are all still in the same place, etc. YUK!!

> >

> > As for the sleeveless - I just go ahead and wear them, trying not

> to raise

> > my arms as much as I might (they don't look to bad at my sides

> after all).

> > The things we do........

> >

> > in GA

> > Still awaiting the elusive 100 pounds gone mark --- probably next

> week with

> > my TOM!

> > Re: Neuroses... , Dani et al

> >

> >

> > > I, too, have terrible self image problems. It is so hard to know

> what to

> > > say when folks tell you how great you look. I have even had that

> depress

> > me

> > > b/c I KNOW what I look like underneath it all. They don't see

> the flabby

> > > thunder thighs, the saggy breasts, the tummy, ok, let's be

honest

> here,

> > > tummieS, and of course let us not forget the batwings.

> > >

> > > Have ya'll noticed that everything is sleveless this year?

> Saturday I went

> > > bargain hunting and shopped at JCPenny's. I found two great

> looking

> > > sleeveless dresses. One on sale for 14.99, one for 17.00. Not

> fancy

> > dresses

> > > but they will go anywhere I need to go other than a formal

> occasion, which

> > > in the summer isn't usually the case. They are both form

fitting,

> tie for

> > > adjusting weight loss (we hope) and a little crocheted type

> jacket to wear

> > > over it. They look great on me with the jacket, shows I have a

> waist but

> > you

> > > take that jacket off and I feel 384 lbs again.

> > >

> > > I think it takes more than two years to get rid of 30 years of

> poor self

> > > imagery.

> > >

> > > Cheryl

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

[Guest guest]

Until the last time I went to the doctor and weighed

in it didn't really feel real - do you know what I

mean? I know that my clothes were either fitting

better or were too big but I kept expecting to wake up

in the morning and they would fit the same again.

When I weighed in and had lost the first 100 pounds I

laughed, cried and praised God all the way back to

work. I feel like it is REAL now - my hearts desire

is really going to come true. I just have to keep

exercising like crazy to work on the extra skin - yuck

is right.

Thanks for letting me add my two cents.

Sue

364/252 - 130 God willing

2/28/01

--- a <shoutjoy@...> wrote:

> Hi Manda,

>

> It's amazing isn't it and it gets more exciting.

> Attitudes towards

> you will increasingly change. It won't be long and

> you will look in

> that mirror and you will think you had a brain

> transplant into another

> body. You will look at her and turn sideways and

> look and you will

> see this woman. Yes, you know it is you, but then

> again.. you look and

> you look. When you pass a window and you see

> yourself, you will stop

> and look as if you were seeing.. well yes it's me

> but..... very very

> interesting.

>

> aW

>

>

> > > Ditto on the image problems for me! It is very

> hard for others to

> > > understand that I comprehend that I am smaller

> and when I look in

> > the mirror

> > > dressed feel like I look pretty good (most of

> the time). However,

> > undressed

> > > is an entirely other issue. My body " type "

> hasn't changed after

> > all - the

> > > folds are all still in the same place, etc.

> YUK!!

> > >

> > > As for the sleeveless - I just go ahead and wear

> them, trying not

> > to raise

> > > my arms as much as I might (they don't look to

> bad at my sides

> > after all).

> > > The things we do........

> > >

> > > in GA

> > > Still awaiting the elusive 100 pounds gone mark

> --- probably next

> > week with

> > > my TOM!

> > > Re: Neuroses... ,

> Dani et al

> > >

> > >

> > > > I, too, have terrible self image problems. It

> is so hard to know

> > what to

> > > > say when folks tell you how great you look. I

> have even had that

> > depress

> > > me

> > > > b/c I KNOW what I look like underneath it all.

> They don't see

> > the flabby

> > > > thunder thighs, the saggy breasts, the tummy,

> ok, let's be

> honest

> > here,

> > > > tummieS, and of course let us not forget the

> batwings.

> > > >

> > > > Have ya'll noticed that everything is

> sleveless this year?

> > Saturday I went

> > > > bargain hunting and shopped at JCPenny's. I

> found two great

> > looking

> > > > sleeveless dresses. One on sale for 14.99, one

> for 17.00. Not

> > fancy

> > > dresses

> > > > but they will go anywhere I need to go other

> than a formal

> > occasion, which

> > > > in the summer isn't usually the case. They are

> both form

> fitting,

> > tie for

> > > > adjusting weight loss (we hope) and a little

> crocheted type

> > jacket to wear

> > > > over it. They look great on me with the

> jacket, shows I have a

> > waist but

> > > you

> > > > take that jacket off and I feel 384 lbs again.

> > > >

> > > > I think it takes more than two years to get

> rid of 30 years of

> > poor self

> > > > imagery.

> > > >

> > > > Cheryl

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

[Guest guest]

Sara, do you mind me asking how old you are?  Have you ever thought of having

surgery?   I was 37 when I had my first.  Are you having your curve monitored? 

Mine went from 50 degrees to 116 in 6 MONTHS!  Have you had any surgical

consults, mris,etc.  I just feel so worried for you.  Do you have so much pain

you have to take strong meds?  I take 30mg oxycotin a day, percocet for

breakthrough pain, Skelexin (for a muscle relaxer) My surgeon told me that my

curve would increase due to gravity and it could be possible that it would be

too severe one day to repair.

      I am not trying to scare you, I feel a connection to you and want to help

you.  Please feel free to ask.  I am feeling stronger and in less pain

everyday.  I still have to lie down most of the day because my discharge says to

avoid sitting due to this being the most painful position    Take Care, Staci

From: Lida Kraz <lidakraz@elkaycorpo ration.com>

Subject: body image

Scoliosis Treatment

Date: Thursday, November 27, 2008, 2:28 PM

Perhaps we could have a discussion about body image and what compensations

some of us make because we are so vulnerable with regard to our shape. How

did you deal with dating when you were younger, and how did it come about

that some of you found partners?

Lida in London

Re:Another blow

" freak of nature " ..... this term you used, , is what I feel. It is a

horrible thing for a woman to label herself or society, but in this body

perfect (or have surgery to create it) world it seems to fit. On the other

hand

it's a miracle we can function with our spines turning and twisting as they

do.

I need to remind myself, I am not my spine. Body image is badly bruised

with scoliosis.

Others thoughts.... ..

Jolene

[Guest guest]

Dereise,

What beautiful words you wrote to Sara.....people robbing her of her

beautiful spirit with ugly words like " deformity " . Profound. I've always felt

that

'deformity' is the ugliest word in our vocabulary. I first heard it from a

" friend's mother who was sitting behind me at a event. She said to me ' " you

are deformed'. I had no idea what that meant, but from the way she said it

and her tone I knew it was something to be ashamed of. I was 13 on July 4,

1960. My first doctor's appointment for my spine was a month away...surgery

was the month after that. I guess as I got older I began to believe her ugly

words. I need to erase Mrs. Wolfe's words from my memory tape. Thanks for

making it clearer to me.

Jolene S curve 95/55

**************Life should be easier. So should your homepage. Try the NEW

AOL.com.

(http://www.aol.com/?optin=new-dp & icid=aolcom40vanity & ncid=emlcntaolcom00000002)

[Guest guest]

Hi Lida...and everyone else,

Body image...whoa, that's a good one. Mine is horrible and it just gets

more terrible with time.

I'm overweight and I know it and I have been most of my life, except

when I starved myself for awhile. I lost weight really quickly but then

I got news of my surgery (all at age 16) and I knew I had to eat and

get healthy. That news knocked some sense into me really quickly. The

only problem is, is that I can't lose it now. The medications over the

years have just piled it on and it won't leave. Plus, with my back and

legs the way they are, I can't exercise. I used to do 100+ sit ups a

day until my surgery. Now, I'm lucky to walk any kind of distance.

Anyway...I truly believe God sent me my husband because of my back. I

had my surgery in June of 1995 and I met him in August 1995 at our

workplace. Our first date of Sept. 2, 1995 and we were married on Sept.

2, 2000. He never cared about my back and it was never an issue until

we were married anyway...if you know what I mean. Not that it was

ever an issue. The only funny story I have is on I think our 2nd date

there was a lightning storm and he didn't know about my back yet. Right

before there was a lightning strike, I shuddered and then it struck. He

looked at me like I was a little weird and then I explained about my

back. We still laugh about that story.

We had our dd last year and I was nervous about a pregnancy but willing

to do whatever I needed to have a baby but to my surprise, I felt the

best I've EVER felt while pregnant. I didn't have any problems at all!

Delivery however was a little different. No epidural, which I NEVER

wanted anyway because I've had enough stuff stuck in my back over the

years and I'm no stranger to pain, but I couldn't deliver the normal

way and needed a c-section. So, because of that, I had to be put

totally under anesthesia. So, my husband taped it for me (luckily they

let him in) and I woke up holding a new little baby! That was a little

weird and definitely SCARY but I would do it again in a second! I

actually lost weight while pregnant and felt great and the few months

after was great. Until Sept. 2007 when I got sciatica.

Everything went downhill after the sciatica. So, that is my story in a

nutshell and now because of my newfound scoliosis...again...I'm back to

being depressed and feel so ugly all the time. Thank GOD for my dd

because she gets me through the day and keeps me going. I'm 29 and I

feel like I'm about 80! No kidding...I think my 89 year old grandma

gets around better than I do and she has not been well lately but I

think she still gets around better. Which I'm so glad for because she

is such an inspiration to me. Anyway...I'm diverting so I know how

everyone feels and I really am glad that there's a group like this out

there that gives such support.

>

> Perhaps we could have a discussion about body image and what

compensations

> some of us make because we are so vulnerable with regard to our

shape. How

> did you deal with dating when you were younger, and how did it come

about

> that some of you found partners?

>

> Lida in London

[Guest guest]

Hi, All,

There is a link between CMT and 28% with CMT have scoliosis.  There is a blood

test to help with a diagnosis. 

 

Lj

From: Lida Kraz <lidakraz@elkaycorp o ration.com>

Subject: body image

Scoliosis Treatment

Date: Thursday, November 27, 2008, 2:28 PM

Perhaps we could have a discussion about body image and what compensations

some of us make because we are so vulnerable with regard to our shape. How

did you deal with dating when you were younger, and how did it come about

that some of you found partners?

Lida in London

Re:Another blow

" freak of nature " ..... this term you used, , is what I feel. It is a

horrible thing for a woman to label herself or society, but in this body

perfect (or have surgery to create it) world it seems to fit. On the other

hand

it's a miracle we can function with our spines turning and twisting as they

do.

I need to remind myself, I am not my spine. Body image is badly bruised

with scoliosis.

Others thoughts.... ..

Jolene