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To Rosemary

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  • 2 weeks later...

Rosemary, I cannot imagine how you feel! I am so sorry! But as a nurse, I

encourage you to:

1. Seek emotional health care from a mental health care provider ASAP! This

is stress at its worst and this stress produces various chemicals and

hormones that causes your brain chemicals to become unbalanced; therefore,

causing depression and Post Traumatic Distress Syndrome. It is unfortunate

that your body becomes unbalanced during this horrible time, but it does

happen and medications will help you through this tough time. You need all

the help you can get at this time!

2. Talk about how you feel and what is going on! It is important to get those

feelings out. Unfortunately, not everyone will be comfortable hearing how

horrible you feel, but seek out those that will listen, encourage you to

talk, and let you cry! I know that you do not know me, but feel free to

e-mail me at Tulsan@... or call me at 918-438-0160. Please find some

around you to talk, cry with, and love you! This is important to all of your

grieving family members. There are grief groups around. I am certified with

RTS which is Resolve Through Sharing Grief Support. I can probably find a

group in your area if you cannot find one.

3. Exercise. Any type of exercise will facilitate the removal of the

chemicals and hormones being released by your body as a result of this

horrible tragedy!

4. Live for today! I bet your hubby would tell you that your children and

grandchildren need you! He is relying on you to carry on! He is waiting on

the other side and you will join him one day! Until then, carry on for him

and as a couple that multiplied with God's wonderful gift of family! Take one

day at a time and sometimes 5 minutes at a time!

Finally, once again I am so sorry! My family will add you to our daily prayer

list. I hope the above steps help and if you cannot do them, get a family

member and work together. Let me know how and if I can help!

Debra Washburn, RN

Surgery on 03/14/01

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  • 4 years later...

Hi Rosemary, and welcome back! We do not know each other but was very moved

by your post. I am soooo sorry for the loss of your husband. It made me think

about my nana who after 51 years of marriage lost my nano to a stroke. We ALL

miss him dearly but my Nana is the one that has suffered the most. I

honestly thought we were going to lose her to. They did EVERYTHING together and

I

often ask her how she's coped for the past 10 years without him..she always

says " Thank God " for the kids and grandkids who have kept her busy, but she

mostly just did what she had to do. She went thru the motions of living every

day

life without her life long partner and she has survived! She also has an

enormous amount of friends and family around her to keep her busy..I admire my

grandmother more than any woman I know, she is just so strong. I understand

how difficult it must be for you but coming back to the board is a huge step,

it will keep you " connected " and that is what this is all about..thankyou for

sharing..it made me think this morning about how blessed we are to have

friends and family who care about us..

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