Re: Radio, awareness of ASD

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

Thanks for posting, I'm not going to blast you, but I am confused, not by what you posted, I think that was great, but I think I must have missed the point of the radio segment.

I think a caller is the one who suggested that "parents with disabled add,adhd kids should not eat out in public" The radio station is not responsible for the comments of the viewers, don't think. I did find that comment offensive.

I thought the point was "If a child is making a scene/having a meltdown in a restaurant, what should be done." Was that not the point? I thought it was then there was all this posting about moving your seat (which is what I normally do, but let's face it, I'm sure the people with the screaming kid might not take this kindly either) or what is causing the meltdown, which are sensory integration issues, I too am bothered by loud noises and can hear the hum of the fluorescent lights, so I am sensitive to that, but I did not think it was the point.

I think the sensitivity is because the child is handicapped and we can all relate to that. But I don't think it is a handicap problem, there are plenty of badly behaved NT kids, we see them everyday. If I was going to call into the radio station, that is what I would have stated first, and then said, that any child, regardless of any status should not be allowed to disrupt a roomful of restaurant patrons who have paid good money to enjoy their meal. And who wants any kid screaming while you are eating? This is not the time to assert a handicapped child's rights, IMHO.

It also is not analagous to the blind child in the wheelchair unless the parents kept allowing the child to tumble display after display, like the screaming child is allowed to continue screaming and screaming. No human being minds an occasional, short-lived disturbance from any child, much less a handicapped child.

I must apologize, but I have this strange habit of saying what I think after someone asks me what I think, I know that is problematic, but is also a warning if you don't want to know what I think and only want someone to agree with you, I am not your gal. I purposely seek friends, other professionals, drs, etc who are like this. People who will risk me getting angry to say what they really believe, especially when they think I need to hear it, it's important to me, and I know that is not the norm.

I also have this uncharacteristic female personality that makes me stay on the point, this gets me in trouble with women frequently who want to bring emotion and other extraneous detail into a conversation which I view as black and white. This may be a function of my personality or a function of my profession.

Noone loves children more than I do, I have spent most of my career fighting hard for all kids, smart ones, handicapped ones, socially unloved ones, ones with not one decent adult in their family. I love them so much I want them to learn the social mores of groups and to have other people enjoy them and I want them to learn to be good neighbors.

Just my opinion,

----- Original Message -----

From: theautismguru

Sent: Friday, June 02, 2006 11:28 AM

Subject: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

Hi, everyone. I don't post too often, simply no time, but still try to at least read these as I can. I live in Akron. I am a single mom of three, two of which are on the spectrum. (One is my 12 year old daughter, for the poster that said she thought she was the only mom with a girl on this group!).I, too, am always dismayed at non-autism supporters' comments, like this person on the radio. If we didn't have someone we love with autism, we would not be as in 'in-tuned' to this population as we are now. We have to take some of this with a grain of salt. Please do not take what I am going to write as being insulting or anything. It isn't meant to be. My kids were runners and my 9 yr. old son with autism still speaks as if he is is yelling (even sounding angry at times, when he is clearly not). I, too, have been on both sides of the fence. I didn't take my children, when younger, to nice restaurants and allow them to scream just because they "had the right" to be there, too. My children do not have the right to ruin everyone else's nice evenings out. Those folks are paying for their dinners because they wanted a break and a nice evening out, also, or are taking a night out away from their own children. Of course, our kids need to learn to act appropriately in a public place or restaurant! But sometimes that means taking baby steps, or as Dr. Jensen pointed out to me years ago, even if it means you ask to be seated, order water and then leave at that time, until you can work up to then ordering, then waiting patiently, then on and on. baby steps. My children were removed immediately and our food was packed up when they were little if they had horrible restaurant or public behaviors. I had to sometimes pay a sitter just to run simple errands, because my kids could not handle more than one 5 minute errand at a time. Nothing seemed to get done on MY schedule. I have seen many parents, even those with kids on the spectrum, decide that THEY want a night out, have no sitter and they are not going to let their child stop them from dining out, and so allow their child to scream, only for me to see that they didn't bring anything to entertain the child with, or they were too engrossed in their adult conversation and ignoring their child's need for whatever. We've all seen this with typical kids, but it happens with parents of kids on the spectrum also. I never had an adult conversation in public as long as my children were present, or we didn't get through a meal.The radio person was simply stating their opinion, as we all are doing over this. Yes, it angers me, too, but I believe she just needs to be educated to some degree, but that doesn't mean it will stop her comments. She, like all of us, have the right to speak our minds freely. Maybe she should be invited to a meeting of the local autism society, but would any of us somewhere we'd be bashed on over and over again? I guess I have become calmer over the years, and at times, have learned to just brush off uneducated people. You aren't going to change them anyways. I have learned to ignore inconsiderate people. Do what it takes to support your child and your family. NO one else matters on the short or long run.Am I big on awareness? you bet. I am the one with the AUTISM license plate in Summit County (which some people find offensive that I put my children's disability on my actual plate). I have an "I LOVE SOMEONE WITH AUTISM" bumper sticker next to it on one side and another bumper sticker about finding the cure". I am all about awareness, always have been. I tell store clerks and everyone in line that my child is on the autism spectrum. But now that they are older, and comprehending everything I say, I think it is now infringing on their right to privacy at times, and to not be labelled publicly, and to not display their disabiity so proudly. My plate will be changing when it expires soon, and available to anyone who wishes to have it next. This and my bumper stickers has gotten me to talk to people I would never have met otherwise, given me a chance to talk to other parents, grandparents, neighbors, etc. of families that live with or know someone with autism. I have had thumbs up at red lights, or someone pulling up alongside me, honking their horn, saying "I also have a child (or brother) with autism". We are all out there. It's been a great public educator, in my opinion. I thought about the t-shirts another group member posted, even looked into an ebay business for it, with comments like, "I stim, therefore, I am", or "Questions about autism?...just ask my mom", and others. They work with small children, and on adults, but my daughter would be HORRIFIED now if her disability was made public for all to see. She says I have those things on my car because of her younger brother (certainly not her, too). He would not like them, either.We all need to support our children and love them no matter what, but not everyone else has to. They don't walk in our shoes, and until they do, most of them will never understand our sitiation, and don't care to, either.I was appalled at the radio announcer's comments, but over the years, I have just chalked it up to, "What a sorry, insensitive, uneducated person that is!" and just feel sorry for them that they will never understand the kind of deep, deep love, patience, and understanding of others' weaknesses that we parents have been educated on with these kids of ours.This is not meant to antagonize anyone, it is simply my humble opinion, based on my own personal experiences. I love my chidren, know their rights, but we all have to be considerate of others' rights, too.One reccomendation to the parent who posted that they have to walk by all the empty handicapped spots...if your child is a runner and it is dangerous for him/her to walk any distance safely to a store, your physician should be able to get you a handicapped plate for your vehicle. This was mentioned to me years ago. Just a thought. It seems sometimes that there are all these empty handicapped spots, but with 27% plus of the population being handicapped in some way, they still don't have 27% of the spots on the lot earmarked as such.Okay, everyone can blast me now. S.

[Guest guest]

<<

I also have this uncharacteristic female personality that makes me stay on the point, this gets me in trouble with women frequently who want to bring emotion and other extraneous detail into a conversation which I view as black and white. This may be a function of my personality or a function of my profession. >>

>>>>>What? Why is everyone looking at me??!!

----- Original Message -----

From: Cochran

Sent: 6/2/2006 12:07:09 PM

Subject: Re: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

Hi ,

Thanks for posting, I'm not going to blast you, but I am confused, not by what you posted, I think that was great, but I think I must have missed the point of the radio segment.

I think a caller is the one who suggested that "parents with disabled add,adhd kids should not eat out in public" The radio station is not responsible for the comments of the viewers, don't think. I did find that comment offensive.

I thought the point was "If a child is making a scene/having a meltdown in a restaurant, what should be done." Was that not the point? I thought it was then there was all this posting about moving your seat (which is what I normally do, but let's face it, I'm sure the people with the screaming kid might not take this kindly either) or what is causing the meltdown, which are sensory integration issues, I too am bothered by loud noises and can hear the hum of the fluorescent lights, so I am sensitive to that, but I did not think it was the point.

I think the sensitivity is because the child is handicapped and we can all relate to that. But I don't think it is a handicap problem, there are plenty of badly behaved NT kids, we see them everyday. If I was going to call into the radio station, that is what I would have stated first, and then said, that any child, regardless of any status should not be allowed to disrupt a roomful of restaurant patrons who have paid good money to enjoy their meal. And who wants any kid screaming while you are eating? This is not the time to assert a handicapped child's rights, IMHO.

It also is not analagous to the blind child in the wheelchair unless the parents kept allowing the child to tumble display after display, like the screaming child is allowed to continue screaming and screaming. No human being minds an occasional, short-lived disturbance from any child, much less a handicapped child.

I must apologize, but I have this strange habit of saying what I think after someone asks me what I think, I know that is problematic, but is also a warning if you don't want to know what I think and only want someone to agree with you, I am not your gal. I purposely seek friends, other professionals, drs, etc who are like this. People who will risk me getting angry to say what they really believe, especially when they think I need to hear it, it's important to me, and I know that is not the norm.

I also have this uncharacteristic female personality that makes me stay on the point, this gets me in trouble with women frequently who want to bring emotion and other extraneous detail into a conversation which I view as black and white. This may be a function of my personality or a function of my profession.

Noone loves children more than I do, I have spent most of my career fighting hard for all kids, smart ones, handicapped ones, socially unloved ones, ones with not one decent adult in their family. I love them so much I want them to learn the social mores of groups and to have other people enjoy them and I want them to learn to be good neighbors.

Just my opinion,

----- Original Message -----

From: theautismguru

Sent: Friday, June 02, 2006 11:28 AM

Subject: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

Hi, everyone. I don't post too often, simply no time, but still try to at least read these as I can. I live in Akron. I am a single mom of three, two of which are on the spectrum. (One is my 12 year old daughter, for the poster that said she thought she was the only mom with a girl on this group!).I, too, am always dismayed at non-autism supporters' comments, like this person on the radio. If we didn't have someone we love with autism, we would not be as in 'in-tuned' to this population as we are now. We have to take some of this with a grain of salt. Please do not take what I am going to write as being insulting or anything. It isn't meant to be. My kids were runners and my 9 yr. old son with autism still speaks as if he is is yelling (even sounding angry at times, when he is clearly not). I, too, have been on both sides of the fence. I didn't take my children, when younger, to nice restaurants and allow them to scream just because they "had the right" to be there, too. My children do not have the right to ruin everyone else's nice evenings out. Those folks are paying for their dinners because they wanted a break and a nice evening out, also, or are taking a night out away from their own children. Of course, our kids need to learn to act appropriately in a public place or restaurant! But sometimes that means taking baby steps, or as Dr. Jensen pointed out to me years ago, even if it means you ask to be seated, order water and then leave at that time, until you can work up to then ordering, then waiting patiently, then on and on. baby steps. My children were removed immediately and our food was packed up when they were little if they had horrible restaurant or public behaviors. I had to sometimes pay a sitter just to run simple errands, because my kids could not handle more than one 5 minute errand at a time. Nothing seemed to get done on MY schedule. I have seen many parents, even those with kids on the spectrum, decide that THEY want a night out, have no sitter and they are not going to let their child stop them from dining out, and so allow their child to scream, only for me to see that they didn't bring anything to entertain the child with, or they were too engrossed in their adult conversation and ignoring their child's need for whatever. We've all seen this with typical kids, but it happens with parents of kids on the spectrum also. I never had an adult conversation in public as long as my children were present, or we didn't get through a meal.The radio person was simply stating their opinion, as we all are doing over this. Yes, it angers me, too, but I believe she just needs to be educated to some degree, but that doesn't mean it will stop her comments. She, like all of us, have the right to speak our minds freely. Maybe she should be invited to a meeting of the local autism society, but would any of us somewhere we'd be bashed on over and over again? I guess I have become calmer over the years, and at times, have learned to just brush off uneducated people. You aren't going to change them anyways. I have learned to ignore inconsiderate people. Do what it takes to support your child and your family. NO one else matters on the short or long run.Am I big on awareness? you bet. I am the one with the AUTISM license plate in Summit County (which some people find offensive that I put my children's disability on my actual plate). I have an "I LOVE SOMEONE WITH AUTISM" bumper sticker next to it on one side and another bumper sticker about finding the cure". I am all about awareness, always have been. I tell store clerks and everyone in line that my child is on the autism spectrum. But now that they are older, and comprehending everything I say, I think it is now infringing on their right to privacy at times, and to not be labelled publicly, and to not display their disabiity so proudly. My plate will be changing when it expires soon, and available to anyone who wishes to have it next. This and my bumper stickers has gotten me to talk to people I would never have met otherwise, given me a chance to talk to other parents, grandparents, neighbors, etc. of families that live with or know someone with autism. I have had thumbs up at red lights, or someone pulling up alongside me, honking their horn, saying "I also have a child (or brother) with autism". We are all out there. It's been a great public educator, in my opinion. I thought about the t-shirts another group member posted, even looked into an ebay business for it, with comments like, "I stim, therefore, I am", or "Questions about autism?...just ask my mom", and others. They work with small children, and on adults, but my daughter would be HORRIFIED now if her disability was made public for all to see. She says I have those things on my car because of her younger brother (certainly not her, too). He would not like them, either.We all need to support our children and love them no matter what, but not everyone else has to. They don't walk in our shoes, and until they do, most of them will never understand our sitiation, and don't care to, either.I was appalled at the radio announcer's comments, but over the years, I have just chalked it up to, "What a sorry, insensitive, uneducated person that is!" and just feel sorry for them that they will never understand the kind of deep, deep love, patience, and understanding of others' weaknesses that we parents have been educated on with these kids of ours.This is not meant to antagonize anyone, it is simply my humble opinion, based on my own personal experiences. I love my chidren, know their rights, but we all have to be considerate of others' rights, too.One reccomendation to the parent who posted that they have to walk by all the empty handicapped spots...if your child is a runner and it is dangerous for him/her to walk any distance safely to a store, your physician should be able to get you a handicapped plate for your vehicle. This was mentioned to me years ago. Just a thought. It seems sometimes that there are all these empty handicapped spots, but with 27% plus of the population being handicapped in some way, they still don't have 27% of the spots on the lot earmarked as such.Okay, everyone can blast me now. S.

[Guest guest]

Just wanted to clarify.. the comment about kids with ADD, ADHD,etc..

should be left at home and not taken to restaurants was made by

Wilde.. one of the DJ's of the morning show. There was no

point to my original comment other than maybe to vent and see what

others thought of a radio personality making such a comment. The

call itself was about any child just misbehaving.. this can be taken

to be so many different things to so many people.. for some a child

that talks loud or fidgets in their seat is misbehaving.. for others

it's an all out meltdown.. this was not clarified on the show.. nor

in my first post.. and that I suppose was my error...

I guess I'm just an emotional and sensitive person....When I heard

the DJ say that.. my heart sank.. I thought she was thoughtless in

her response not thinking what parents of those types of children

might think.. I suppose I don't see things as just black and white

since there is always a large grey area surrounding it that I'm not

afraid to tread into...

>

> Hi ,

>

> Thanks for posting, I'm not going to blast you, but I am confused,

not by what you posted, I think that was great, but I think I must

have missed the point of the radio segment.

>

> I think a caller is the one who suggested that " parents with

disabled add,adhd kids should not eat out in public " The radio

station is not responsible for the comments of the viewers, don't

think. I did find that comment offensive.

>

> I thought the point was " If a child is making a scene/having a

meltdown in a restaurant, what should be done. " Was that not the

point? I thought it was then there was all this posting about

moving your seat (which is what I normally do, but let's face it,

I'm sure the people with the screaming kid might not take this

kindly either) or what is causing the meltdown, which are sensory

integration issues, I too am bothered by loud noises and can hear

the hum of the fluorescent lights, so I am sensitive to that, but I

did not think it was the point.

>

> I think the sensitivity is because the child is handicapped and we

can all relate to that. But I don't think it is a handicap problem,

there are plenty of badly behaved NT kids, we see them everyday. If

I was going to call into the radio station, that is what I would

have stated first, and then said, that any child, regardless of any

status should not be allowed to disrupt a roomful of restaurant

patrons who have paid good money to enjoy their meal. And who wants

any kid screaming while you are eating? This is not the time to

assert a handicapped child's rights, IMHO.

>

> It also is not analagous to the blind child in the wheelchair

unless the parents kept allowing the child to tumble display after

display, like the screaming child is allowed to continue screaming

and screaming. No human being minds an occasional, short-lived

disturbance from any child, much less a handicapped child.

>

> I must apologize, but I have this strange habit of saying what I

think after someone asks me what I think, I know that is

problematic, but is also a warning if you don't want to know what I

think and only want someone to agree with you, I am not your gal. I

purposely seek friends, other professionals, drs, etc who are like

this. People who will risk me getting angry to say what they really

believe, especially when they think I need to hear it, it's

important to me, and I know that is not the norm.

>

> I also have this uncharacteristic female personality that makes me

stay on the point, this gets me in trouble with women frequently who

want to bring emotion and other extraneous detail into a

conversation which I view as black and white. This may be a function

of my personality or a function of my profession.

>

> Noone loves children more than I do, I have spent most of my

career fighting hard for all kids, smart ones, handicapped ones,

socially unloved ones, ones with not one decent adult in their

family. I love them so much I want them to learn the social mores of

groups and to have other people enjoy them and I want them to learn

to be good neighbors.

>

> Just my opinion,

>

> ----- Original Message -----

> From: theautismguru

>

> Sent: Friday, June 02, 2006 11:28 AM

> Subject: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

>

>

> Hi, everyone. I don't post too often, simply no time, but still

try to at least read these as I

> can. I live in Akron. I am a single mom of three, two of which

are on the spectrum. (One

> is my 12 year old daughter, for the poster that said she thought

she was the only mom

> with a girl on this group!).

> I, too, am always dismayed at non-autism supporters' comments,

like this person on the

> radio. If we didn't have someone we love with autism, we would

not be as in 'in-tuned' to

> this population as we are now. We have to take some of this

with a grain of salt. Please

> do not take what I am going to write as being insulting or

anything. It isn't meant to be.

> My kids were runners and my 9 yr. old son with autism still

speaks as if he is is yelling

> (even sounding angry at times, when he is clearly not). I, too,

have been on both sides of

> the fence. I didn't take my children, when younger, to nice

restaurants and allow them to

> scream just because they " had the right " to be there, too. My

children do not have the

> right to ruin everyone else's nice evenings out. Those folks

are paying for their dinners

> because they wanted a break and a nice evening out, also, or are

taking a night out away

> from their own children. Of course, our kids need to learn to

act appropriately in a public

> place or restaurant! But sometimes that means taking baby

steps, or as Dr.

> Jensen pointed out to me years ago, even if it means you ask to

be seated, order water and

> then leave at that time, until you can work up to then ordering,

then waiting patiently, then

> on and on. baby steps. My children were removed immediately

and our food was packed

> up when they were little if they had horrible restaurant or

public behaviors. I had to

> sometimes pay a sitter just to run simple errands, because my

kids could not handle more

> than one 5 minute errand at a time. Nothing seemed to get done

on MY schedule. I have

> seen many parents, even those with kids on the spectrum, decide

that THEY want a night

> out, have no sitter and they are not going to let their child

stop them from dining out, and

> so allow their child to scream, only for me to see that they

didn't bring anything to

> entertain the child with, or they were too engrossed in their

adult conversation and

> ignoring their child's need for whatever. We've all seen this

with typical kids, but it

> happens with parents of kids on the spectrum also. I never had

an adult conversation in

> public as long as my children were present, or we didn't get

through a meal.

> The radio person was simply stating their opinion, as we all are

doing over this. Yes, it

> angers me, too, but I believe she just needs to be educated to

some degree, but that

> doesn't mean it will stop her comments. She, like all of us,

have the right to speak our

> minds freely. Maybe she should be invited to a meeting of the

local autism society, but

> would any of us somewhere we'd be bashed on over and over

again? I guess I have

> become calmer over the years, and at times, have learned to just

brush off uneducated

> people. You aren't going to change them anyways. I have

learned to ignore inconsiderate

> people. Do what it takes to support your child and your

family. NO one else matters on

> the short or long run.

> Am I big on awareness? you bet. I am the one with the AUTISM

license plate in Summit

> County (which some people find offensive that I put my

children's disability on my actual

> plate). I have an " I LOVE SOMEONE WITH AUTISM " bumper sticker

next to it on one side

> and another bumper sticker about finding the cure " . I am all

about awareness, always

> have been. I tell store clerks and everyone in line that my

child is on the autism spectrum.

> But now that they are older, and comprehending everything I say,

I think it is now

> infringing on their right to privacy at times, and to not be

labelled publicly, and to not

> display their disabiity so proudly. My plate will be changing

when it expires soon, and

> available to anyone who wishes to have it next. This and my

bumper stickers has gotten

> me to talk to people I would never have met otherwise, given me

a chance to talk to other

> parents, grandparents, neighbors, etc. of families that live

with or know someone with

> autism. I have had thumbs up at red lights, or someone pulling

up alongside me, honking

> their horn, saying " I also have a child (or brother) with

autism " . We are all out there. It's

> been a great public educator, in my opinion. I thought about

the t-shirts another group

> member posted, even looked into an ebay business for it, with

comments like, " I stim,

> therefore, I am " , or " Questions about autism?...just ask my

mom " , and others. They work

> with small children, and on adults, but my daughter would be

HORRIFIED now if her

> disability was made public for all to see. She says I have

those things on my car because

> of her younger brother (certainly not her, too). He would not

like them, either.

> We all need to support our children and love them no matter

what, but not everyone else

> has to. They don't walk in our shoes, and until they do, most

of them will never

> understand our sitiation, and don't care to, either.

> I was appalled at the radio announcer's comments, but over the

years, I have just chalked

> it up to, " What a sorry, insensitive, uneducated person that

is! " and just feel sorry for them

> that they will never understand the kind of deep, deep love,

patience, and understanding

> of others' weaknesses that we parents have been educated on with

these kids of ours.

> This is not meant to antagonize anyone, it is simply my humble

opinion, based on my own

> personal experiences. I love my chidren, know their rights, but

we all have to be

> considerate of others' rights, too.

> One reccomendation to the parent who posted that they have to

walk by all the empty

> handicapped spots...if your child is a runner and it is

dangerous for him/her to walk any

> distance safely to a store, your physician should be able to get

you a handicapped plate for

> your vehicle. This was mentioned to me years ago. Just a

thought. It seems sometimes

> that there are all these empty handicapped spots, but with 27%

plus of the population

> being handicapped in some way, they still don't have 27% of the

spots on the lot

> earmarked as such.

> Okay, everyone can blast me now.

> S.

>

>

>

>

>

>

> *Just Some Group Notes:

>

> ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

>

> We can help raise money for ASO (Autism Society of Ohio). Just

by using a charity based search engine. Search for anything you

need info on. 2 steps: Just click on the link then type in Autism

Society of Ohio and hit verify. Then type in your search word.

heres the link: http://www.goodsearch.com

>

> ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

>

> When Adding to your email address book, don't forget to

include the s in groups. Here is the complete address:

>

>

> ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

>

> Our Parent Contact list - see a printable list or add your

contact info:

>

> See the printable list:

/database?

method=reportRows & tbl=2 & sortBy=1 & sortDir=down & startAt= & prntRpt=1

>

> Add your contact info here:

/database?

method=addRecord & tbl=2

>

> ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

>

> Would you like to invite a friend to our group?

> Would you like to handout information about our group to your

area meeting?

> Just print out some handouts from this link:

>

http://f4.grp.fs.com/v1/AIN0RLAa_M73oRrFIxpAYAoyKhpUQjhAQwLZyn-

aHudv5wBIo5CIDOYwMaYSuKIwsAQHkU2a2WBN2D3h6hU6ig/ -Handout.doc

>

> ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

>

> See our group photo albums or Add your family photo album here:

> http://health.ph./group/ /photos

>

> ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

>

> is a networking and support group

> of " Parent to Parent for Autism " .

> Website: http://hometown.aol.com/parentschat/homepage.html

>

> ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

well said and straight to the point, as I typically am, . Thank you for

your kind

words.

I have not read all the posts so thanks for clarifying it was possibly a caller,

not the radio

personality, who made the statement. It was offensive to everyone here, as

evidenced by

all the posts on this very topic. If it was a caller, then the radio person

should have

elbaorated or delved into a deeper discussion on that subject.

I like your analogies. Thanks for sharing your opinion.

>

> Hi ,

>

> Thanks for posting, I'm not going to blast you, but I am confused, not by what

you

posted, I think that was great, but I think I must have missed the point of the

radio

segment.

>

> I think a caller is the one who suggested that " parents with disabled add,adhd

kids

should not eat out in public " The radio station is not responsible for the

comments of the

viewers, don't think. I did find that comment offensive.

>

> I thought the point was " If a child is making a scene/having a meltdown in a

restaurant,

what should be done. " Was that not the point? I thought it was then there was

all this

posting about moving your seat (which is what I normally do, but let's face it,

I'm sure the

people with the screaming kid might not take this kindly either) or what is

causing the

meltdown, which are sensory integration issues, I too am bothered by loud noises

and can

hear the hum of the fluorescent lights, so I am sensitive to that, but I did not

think it was

the point.

>

> I think the sensitivity is because the child is handicapped and we can all

relate to that.

But I don't think it is a handicap problem, there are plenty of badly behaved NT

kids, we

see them everyday. If I was going to call into the radio station, that is what I

would have

stated first, and then said, that any child, regardless of any status should not

be allowed to

disrupt a roomful of restaurant patrons who have paid good money to enjoy their

meal.

And who wants any kid screaming while you are eating? This is not the time to

assert a

handicapped child's rights, IMHO.

>

> It also is not analagous to the blind child in the wheelchair unless the

parents kept

allowing the child to tumble display after display, like the screaming child is

allowed to

continue screaming and screaming. No human being minds an occasional,

short-lived

disturbance from any child, much less a handicapped child.

>

> I must apologize, but I have this strange habit of saying what I think after

someone asks

me what I think, I know that is problematic, but is also a warning if you don't

want to know

what I think and only want someone to agree with you, I am not your gal. I

purposely seek

friends, other professionals, drs, etc who are like this. People who will risk

me getting

angry to say what they really believe, especially when they think I need to hear

it, it's

important to me, and I know that is not the norm.

>

> I also have this uncharacteristic female personality that makes me stay on the

point, this

gets me in trouble with women frequently who want to bring emotion and other

extraneous detail into a conversation which I view as black and white. This may

be a

function of my personality or a function of my profession.

>

> Noone loves children more than I do, I have spent most of my career fighting

hard for all

kids, smart ones, handicapped ones, socially unloved ones, ones with not one

decent adult

in their family. I love them so much I want them to learn the social mores of

groups and to

have other people enjoy them and I want them to learn to be good neighbors.

>

> Just my opinion,

>

> ----- Original Message -----

> From: theautismguru

>

> Sent: Friday, June 02, 2006 11:28 AM

> Subject: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

>

>

> Hi, everyone. I don't post too often, simply no time, but still try to at

least read these

as I

> can. I live in Akron. I am a single mom of three, two of which are on the

spectrum.

(One

> is my 12 year old daughter, for the poster that said she thought she was the

only mom

> with a girl on this group!).

> I, too, am always dismayed at non-autism supporters' comments, like this

person on

the

> radio. If we didn't have someone we love with autism, we would not be as in

'in-tuned'

to

> this population as we are now. We have to take some of this with a grain of

salt.

Please

> do not take what I am going to write as being insulting or anything. It

isn't meant to

be.

> My kids were runners and my 9 yr. old son with autism still speaks as if he

is is yelling

> (even sounding angry at times, when he is clearly not). I, too, have been

on both sides

of

> the fence. I didn't take my children, when younger, to nice restaurants and

allow them

to

> scream just because they " had the right " to be there, too. My children do

not have the

> right to ruin everyone else's nice evenings out. Those folks are paying for

their dinners

> because they wanted a break and a nice evening out, also, or are taking a

night out

away

> from their own children. Of course, our kids need to learn to act

appropriately in a

public

> place or restaurant! But sometimes that means taking baby steps, or as Dr.

> Jensen pointed out to me years ago, even if it means you ask to be seated,

order water

and

> then leave at that time, until you can work up to then ordering, then

waiting patiently,

then

> on and on. baby steps. My children were removed immediately and our food

was

packed

> up when they were little if they had horrible restaurant or public

behaviors. I had to

> sometimes pay a sitter just to run simple errands, because my kids could not

handle

more

> than one 5 minute errand at a time. Nothing seemed to get done on MY

schedule. I

have

> seen many parents, even those with kids on the spectrum, decide that THEY

want a

night

> out, have no sitter and they are not going to let their child stop them from

dining out,

and

> so allow their child to scream, only for me to see that they didn't bring

anything to

> entertain the child with, or they were too engrossed in their adult

conversation and

> ignoring their child's need for whatever. We've all seen this with typical

kids, but it

> happens with parents of kids on the spectrum also. I never had an adult

conversation

in

> public as long as my children were present, or we didn't get through a meal.

> The radio person was simply stating their opinion, as we all are doing over

this. Yes, it

> angers me, too, but I believe she just needs to be educated to some degree,

but that

> doesn't mean it will stop her comments. She, like all of us, have the right

to speak our

> minds freely. Maybe she should be invited to a meeting of the local autism

society, but

> would any of us somewhere we'd be bashed on over and over again? I guess I

have

> become calmer over the years, and at times, have learned to just brush off

uneducated

> people. You aren't going to change them anyways. I have learned to ignore

inconsiderate

> people. Do what it takes to support your child and your family. NO one

else matters

on

> the short or long run.

> Am I big on awareness? you bet. I am the one with the AUTISM license plate

in Summit

> County (which some people find offensive that I put my children's disability

on my

actual

> plate). I have an " I LOVE SOMEONE WITH AUTISM " bumper sticker next to it on

one side

> and another bumper sticker about finding the cure " . I am all about

awareness, always

> have been. I tell store clerks and everyone in line that my child is on the

autism

spectrum.

> But now that they are older, and comprehending everything I say, I think it

is now

> infringing on their right to privacy at times, and to not be labelled

publicly, and to not

> display their disabiity so proudly. My plate will be changing when it

expires soon, and

> available to anyone who wishes to have it next. This and my bumper stickers

has

gotten

> me to talk to people I would never have met otherwise, given me a chance to

talk to

other

> parents, grandparents, neighbors, etc. of families that live with or know

someone with

> autism. I have had thumbs up at red lights, or someone pulling up alongside

me,

honking

> their horn, saying " I also have a child (or brother) with autism " . We are

all out there.

It's

> been a great public educator, in my opinion. I thought about the t-shirts

another

group

> member posted, even looked into an ebay business for it, with comments like,

" I stim,

> therefore, I am " , or " Questions about autism?...just ask my mom " , and

others. They

work

> with small children, and on adults, but my daughter would be HORRIFIED now

if her

> disability was made public for all to see. She says I have those things on

my car

because

> of her younger brother (certainly not her, too). He would not like them,

either.

> We all need to support our children and love them no matter what, but not

everyone

else

> has to. They don't walk in our shoes, and until they do, most of them will

never

> understand our sitiation, and don't care to, either.

> I was appalled at the radio announcer's comments, but over the years, I have

just

chalked

> it up to, " What a sorry, insensitive, uneducated person that is! " and just

feel sorry for

them

> that they will never understand the kind of deep, deep love, patience, and

understanding

> of others' weaknesses that we parents have been educated on with these kids

of ours.

> This is not meant to antagonize anyone, it is simply my humble opinion,

based on my

own

> personal experiences. I love my chidren, know their rights, but we all have

to be

> considerate of others' rights, too.

> One reccomendation to the parent who posted that they have to walk by all

the empty

> handicapped spots...if your child is a runner and it is dangerous for

him/her to walk

any

> distance safely to a store, your physician should be able to get you a

handicapped

plate for

> your vehicle. This was mentioned to me years ago. Just a thought. It seems

sometimes

> that there are all these empty handicapped spots, but with 27% plus of the

population

> being handicapped in some way, they still don't have 27% of the spots on the

lot

> earmarked as such.

> Okay, everyone can blast me now.

> S.

>

>

>

>

>

>

> *Just Some Group Notes:

>

> ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

>

> We can help raise money for ASO (Autism Society of Ohio). Just by using a

charity

based search engine. Search for anything you need info on. 2 steps: Just click

on the link

then type in Autism Society of Ohio and hit verify. Then type in your search

word. heres

the link: http://www.goodsearch.com

>

> ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

>

> When Adding to your email address book, don't forget to include the

s in

groups. Here is the complete address:

>

>

> ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

>

> Our Parent Contact list - see a printable list or add your contact info:

>

> See the printable list:

/database?

method=reportRows & tbl=2 & sortBy=1 & sortDir=down & startAt= & prntRpt=1

>

> Add your contact info here: /

database?method=addRecord & tbl=2

>

> ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

>

> Would you like to invite a friend to our group?

> Would you like to handout information about our group to your area meeting?

> Just print out some handouts from this link:

> http://f4.grp.fs.com/v1/AIN0RLAa_M73oRrFIxpAYAoyKhpUQjhAQwLZyn-

aHudv5wBIo5CIDOYwMaYSuKIwsAQHkU2a2WBN2D3h6hU6ig/ -Handout.doc

>

> ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

>

> See our group photo albums or Add your family photo album here:

> http://health.ph./group/ /photos

>

> ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

>

> is a networking and support group

> of " Parent to Parent for Autism " .

> Website: http://hometown.aol.com/parentschat/homepage.html

>

> ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

obviously, many of us share this characteristic, which can, on occasion, get us

misunderstood, or in trouble.

>

> <<

> I also have this uncharacteristic female personality that makes me stay on the

point, this

gets me in trouble with women frequently who want to bring emotion and other

extraneous detail into a conversation which I view as black and white. This may

be a

function of my personality or a function of my profession. >>

>

> >>>>>What? Why is everyone looking at me??!!

>

>

>

>

>

> ----- Original Message -----

> From: Cochran

>

> Sent: 6/2/2006 12:07:09 PM

> Subject: Re: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

>

>

> Hi ,

>

> Thanks for posting, I'm not going to blast you, but I am confused, not by what

you

posted, I think that was great, but I think I must have missed the point of the

radio

segment.

>

> I think a caller is the one who suggested that " parents with disabled add,adhd

kids

should not eat out in public " The radio station is not responsible for the

comments of the

viewers, don't think. I did find that comment offensive.

>

> I thought the point was " If a child is making a scene/having a meltdown in a

restaurant,

what should be done. " Was that not the point? I thought it was then there was

all this

posting about moving your seat (which is what I normally do, but let's face it,

I'm sure the

people with the screaming kid might not take this kindly either) or what is

causing the

meltdown, which are sensory integration issues, I too am bothered by loud noises

and can

hear the hum of the fluorescent lights, so I am sensitive to that, but I did not

think it was

the point.

>

> I think the sensitivity is because the child is handicapped and we can all

relate to that.

But I don't think it is a handicap problem, there are plenty of badly behaved NT

kids, we

see them everyday. If I was going to call into the radio station, that is what I

would have

stated first, and then said, that any child, regardless of any status should not

be allowed to

disrupt a roomful of restaurant patrons who have paid good money to enjoy their

meal.

And who wants any kid screaming while you are eating? This is not the time to

assert a

handicapped child's rights, IMHO.

>

> It also is not analagous to the blind child in the wheelchair unless the

parents kept

allowing the child to tumble display after display, like the screaming child is

allowed to

continue screaming and screaming. No human being minds an occasional,

short-lived

disturbance from any child, much less a handicapped child.

>

> I must apologize, but I have this strange habit of saying what I think after

someone asks

me what I think, I know that is problematic, but is also a warning if you don't

want to know

what I think and only want someone to agree with you, I am not your gal. I

purposely seek

friends, other professionals, drs, etc who are like this. People who will risk

me getting

angry to say what they really believe, especially when they think I need to hear

it, it's

important to me, and I know that is not the norm.

>

> I also have this uncharacteristic female personality that makes me stay on the

point, this

gets me in trouble with women frequently who want to bring emotion and other

extraneous detail into a conversation which I view as black and white. This may

be a

function of my personality or a function of my profession.

>

> Noone loves children more than I do, I have spent most of my career fighting

hard for all

kids, smart ones, handicapped ones, socially unloved ones, ones with not one

decent adult

in their family. I love them so much I want them to learn the social mores of

groups and to

have other people enjoy them and I want them to learn to be good neighbors.

>

> Just my opinion,

>

> ----- Original Message -----

> From: theautismguru

>

> Sent: Friday, June 02, 2006 11:28 AM

> Subject: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

>

>

> Hi, everyone. I don't post too often, simply no time, but still try to at

least read these as

I

> can. I live in Akron. I am a single mom of three, two of which are on the

spectrum.

(One

> is my 12 year old daughter, for the poster that said she thought she was the

only mom

> with a girl on this group!).

> I, too, am always dismayed at non-autism supporters' comments, like this

person on the

> radio. If we didn't have someone we love with autism, we would not be as in

'in-tuned'

to

> this population as we are now. We have to take some of this with a grain of

salt. Please

> do not take what I am going to write as being insulting or anything. It isn't

meant to be.

> My kids were runners and my 9 yr. old son with autism still speaks as if he is

is yelling

> (even sounding angry at times, when he is clearly not). I, too, have been on

both sides

of

> the fence. I didn't take my children, when younger, to nice restaurants and

allow them

to

> scream just because they " had the right " to be there, too. My children do not

have the

> right to ruin everyone else's nice evenings out. Those folks are paying for

their dinners

> because they wanted a break and a nice evening out, also, or are taking a

night out away

> from their own children. Of course, our kids need to learn to act

appropriately in a

public

> place or restaurant! But sometimes that means taking baby steps, or as Dr.

> Jensen pointed out to me years ago, even if it means you ask to be seated,

order water

and

> then leave at that time, until you can work up to then ordering, then waiting

patiently,

then

> on and on. baby steps. My children were removed immediately and our food was

packed

> up when they were little if they had horrible restaurant or public behaviors.

I had to

> sometimes pay a sitter just to run simple errands, because my kids could not

handle

more

> than one 5 minute errand at a time. Nothing seemed to get done on MY

schedule. I

have

> seen many parents, even those with kids on the spectrum, decide that THEY want

a

night

> out, have no sitter and they are not going to let their child stop them from

dining out,

and

> so allow their child to scream, only for me to see that they didn't bring

anything to

> entertain the child with, or they were too engrossed in their adult

conversation and

> ignoring their child's need for whatever. We've all seen this with typical

kids, but it

> happens with parents of kids on the spectrum also. I never had an adult

conversation in

> public as long as my children were present, or we didn't get through a meal.

> The radio person was simply stating their opinion, as we all are doing over

this. Yes, it

> angers me, too, but I believe she just needs to be educated to some degree,

but that

> doesn't mean it will stop her comments. She, like all of us, have the right

to speak our

> minds freely. Maybe she should be invited to a meeting of the local autism

society, but

> would any of us somewhere we'd be bashed on over and over again? I guess I

have

> become calmer over the years, and at times, have learned to just brush off

uneducated

> people. You aren't going to change them anyways. I have learned to ignore

inconsiderate

> people. Do what it takes to support your child and your family. NO one else

matters on

> the short or long run.

> Am I big on awareness? you bet. I am the one with the AUTISM license plate

in Summit

> County (which some people find offensive that I put my children's disability

on my actual

> plate). I have an " I LOVE SOMEONE WITH AUTISM " bumper sticker next to it on

one side

> and another bumper sticker about finding the cure " . I am all about awareness,

always

> have been. I tell store clerks and everyone in line that my child is on the

autism

spectrum.

> But now that they are older, and comprehending everything I say, I think it is

now

> infringing on their right to privacy at times, and to not be labelled

publicly, and to not

> display their disabiity so proudly. My plate will be changing when it expires

soon, and

> available to anyone who wishes to have it next. This and my bumper stickers

has gotten

> me to talk to people I would never have met otherwise, given me a chance to

talk to

other

> parents, grandparents, neighbors, etc. of families that live with or know

someone with

> autism. I have had thumbs up at red lights, or someone pulling up alongside

me,

honking

> their horn, saying " I also have a child (or brother) with autism " . We are all

out there. It's

> been a great public educator, in my opinion. I thought about the t-shirts

another group

> member posted, even looked into an ebay business for it, with comments like,

" I stim,

> therefore, I am " , or " Questions about autism?...just ask my mom " , and others.

They

work

> with small children, and on adults, but my daughter would be HORRIFIED now if

her

> disability was made public for all to see. She says I have those things on my

car because

> of her younger brother (certainly not her, too). He would not like them,

either.

> We all need to support our children and love them no matter what, but not

everyone else

> has to. They don't walk in our shoes, and until they do, most of them will

never

> understand our sitiation, and don't care to, either.

> I was appalled at the radio announcer's comments, but over the years, I have

just

chalked

> it up to, " What a sorry, insensitive, uneducated person that is! " and just

feel sorry for

them

> that they will never understand the kind of deep, deep love, patience, and

understanding

> of others' weaknesses that we parents have been educated on with these kids of

ours.

> This is not meant to antagonize anyone, it is simply my humble opinion, based

on my

own

> personal experiences. I love my chidren, know their rights, but we all have

to be

> considerate of others' rights, too.

> One reccomendation to the parent who posted that they have to walk by all the

empty

> handicapped spots...if your child is a runner and it is dangerous for him/her

to walk any

> distance safely to a store, your physician should be able to get you a

handicapped plate

for

> your vehicle. This was mentioned to me years ago. Just a thought. It seems

sometimes

> that there are all these empty handicapped spots, but with 27% plus of the

population

> being handicapped in some way, they still don't have 27% of the spots on the

lot

> earmarked as such.

> Okay, everyone can blast me now.

> S.

>

>

>

>

>

>

> *Just Some Group Notes:

>

> ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

>

> We can help raise money for ASO (Autism Society of Ohio). Just by using a

charity based

search engine. Search for anything you need info on. 2 steps: Just click on

the link then

type in Autism Society of Ohio and hit verify. Then type in your search word.

heres the

link: http://www.goodsearch.com

>

> ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

>

> When Adding to your email address book, don't forget to include the s

in

groups. Here is the complete address:

>

>

> ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

>

> Our Parent Contact list - see a printable list or add your contact info:

>

> See the printable list:

/database?

method=reportRows & tbl=2 & sortBy=1 & sortDir=down & startAt= & prntRpt=1

>

> Add your contact info here: /

database?method=addRecord & tbl=2

>

> ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

>

> Would you like to invite a friend to our group?

> Would you like to handout information about our group to your area meeting?

> Just print out some handouts from this link:

> http://f4.grp.fs.com/v1/AIN0RLAa_M73oRrFIxpAYAoyKhpUQjhAQwLZyn-

aHudv5wBIo5CIDOYwMaYSuKIwsAQHkU2a2WBN2D3h6hU6ig/ -Handout.doc

>

> ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

>

> See our group photo albums or Add your family photo album here:

> http://health.ph./group/ /photos

>

> ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

>

> is a networking and support group

> of " Parent to Parent for Autism " .

> Website: http://hometown.aol.com/parentschat/homepage.html

>

> ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

LOL, well I wasn't thinking particularly of you when I wrote that, just all women, in general, of which I am one. And there are times when emotion and extraneous sublties are an issue with something and times when it is not. The wisdom is, as they say, knowing when to apply it and when to leave it out. Like everyone, still working on that.

Can you bring your artwork to the list, , or give me a link, I would love to see it, to analyze it, just kidding :-)

From: rmaher1969@...

Sent: Friday, June 02, 2006 12:16 PM

Subject: Re: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

<< I also have this uncharacteristic female personality that makes me stay on the point, this gets me in trouble with women frequently who want to bring emotion and other extraneous detail into a conversation which I view as black and white. This may be a function of my personality or a function of my profession. >>

>>>>>What? Why is everyone looking at me??!!

----- Original Message -----

From: Cochran

Sent: 6/2/2006 12:07:09 PM

Subject: Re: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

Hi ,

Thanks for posting, I'm not going to blast you, but I am confused, not by what you posted, I think that was great, but I think I must have missed the point of the radio segment.

I think a caller is the one who suggested that "parents with disabled add,adhd kids should not eat out in public" The radio station is not responsible for the comments of the viewers, don't think. I did find that comment offensive.

I thought the point was "If a child is making a scene/having a meltdown in a restaurant, what should be done." Was that not the point? I thought it was then there was all this posting about moving your seat (which is what I normally do, but let's face it, I'm sure the people with the screaming kid might not take this kindly either) or what is causing the meltdown, which are sensory integration issues, I too am bothered by loud noises and can hear the hum of the fluorescent lights, so I am sensitive to that, but I did not think it was the point.

I think the sensitivity is because the child is handicapped and we can all relate to that. But I don't think it is a handicap problem, there are plenty of badly behaved NT kids, we see them everyday. If I was going to call into the radio station, that is what I would have stated first, and then said, that any child, regardless of any status should not be allowed to disrupt a roomful of restaurant patrons who have paid good money to enjoy their meal. And who wants any kid screaming while you are eating? This is not the time to assert a handicapped child's rights, IMHO.

It also is not analagous to the blind child in the wheelchair unless the parents kept allowing the child to tumble display after display, like the screaming child is allowed to continue screaming and screaming. No human being minds an occasional, short-lived disturbance from any child, much less a handicapped child.

I must apologize, but I have this strange habit of saying what I think after someone asks me what I think, I know that is problematic, but is also a warning if you don't want to know what I think and only want someone to agree with you, I am not your gal. I purposely seek friends, other professionals, drs, etc who are like this. People who will risk me getting angry to say what they really believe, especially when they think I need to hear it, it's important to me, and I know that is not the norm.

I also have this uncharacteristic female personality that makes me stay on the point, this gets me in trouble with women frequently who want to bring emotion and other extraneous detail into a conversation which I view as black and white. This may be a function of my personality or a function of my profession.

Noone loves children more than I do, I have spent most of my career fighting hard for all kids, smart ones, handicapped ones, socially unloved ones, ones with not one decent adult in their family. I love them so much I want them to learn the social mores of groups and to have other people enjoy them and I want them to learn to be good neighbors.

Just my opinion,

----- Original Message -----

From: theautismguru

Sent: Friday, June 02, 2006 11:28 AM

Subject: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

Hi, everyone. I don't post too often, simply no time, but still try to at least read these as I can. I live in Akron. I am a single mom of three, two of which are on the spectrum. (One is my 12 year old daughter, for the poster that said she thought she was the only mom with a girl on this group!).I, too, am always dismayed at non-autism supporters' comments, like this person on the radio. If we didn't have someone we love with autism, we would not be as in 'in-tuned' to this population as we are now. We have to take some of this with a grain of salt. Please do not take what I am going to write as being insulting or anything. It isn't meant to be. My kids were runners and my 9 yr. old son with autism still speaks as if he is is yelling (even sounding angry at times, when he is clearly not). I, too, have been on both sides of the fence. I didn't take my children, when younger, to nice restaurants and allow them to scream just because they "had the right" to be there, too. My children do not have the right to ruin everyone else's nice evenings out. Those folks are paying for their dinners because they wanted a break and a nice evening out, also, or are taking a night out away from their own children. Of course, our kids need to learn to act appropriately in a public place or restaurant! But sometimes that means taking baby steps, or as Dr. Jensen pointed out to me years ago, even if it means you ask to be seated, order water and then leave at that time, until you can work up to then ordering, then waiting patiently, then on and on. baby steps. My children were removed immediately and our food was packed up when they were little if they had horrible restaurant or public behaviors. I had to sometimes pay a sitter just to run simple errands, because my kids could not handle more than one 5 minute errand at a time. Nothing seemed to get done on MY schedule. I have seen many parents, even those with kids on the spectrum, decide that THEY want a night out, have no sitter and they are not going to let their child stop them from dining out, and so allow their child to scream, only for me to see that they didn't bring anything to entertain the child with, or they were too engrossed in their adult conversation and ignoring their child's need for whatever. We've all seen this with typical kids, but it happens with parents of kids on the spectrum also. I never had an adult conversation in public as long as my children were present, or we didn't get through a meal.The radio person was simply stating their opinion, as we all are doing over this. Yes, it angers me, too, but I believe she just needs to be educated to some degree, but that doesn't mean it will stop her comments. She, like all of us, have the right to speak our minds freely. Maybe she should be invited to a meeting of the local autism society, but would any of us somewhere we'd be bashed on over and over again? I guess I have become calmer over the years, and at times, have learned to just brush off uneducated people. You aren't going to change them anyways. I have learned to ignore inconsiderate people. Do what it takes to support your child and your family. NO one else matters on the short or long run.Am I big on awareness? you bet. I am the one with the AUTISM license plate in Summit County (which some people find offensive that I put my children's disability on my actual plate). I have an "I LOVE SOMEONE WITH AUTISM" bumper sticker next to it on one side and another bumper sticker about finding the cure". I am all about awareness, always have been. I tell store clerks and everyone in line that my child is on the autism spectrum. But now that they are older, and comprehending everything I say, I think it is now infringing on their right to privacy at times, and to not be labelled publicly, and to not display their disabiity so proudly. My plate will be changing when it expires soon, and available to anyone who wishes to have it next. This and my bumper stickers has gotten me to talk to people I would never have met otherwise, given me a chance to talk to other parents, grandparents, neighbors, etc. of families that live with or know someone with autism. I have had thumbs up at red lights, or someone pulling up alongside me, honking their horn, saying "I also have a child (or brother) with autism". We are all out there. It's been a great public educator, in my opinion. I thought about the t-shirts another group member posted, even looked into an ebay business for it, with comments like, "I stim, therefore, I am", or "Questions about autism?...just ask my mom", and others. They work with small children, and on adults, but my daughter would be HORRIFIED now if her disability was made public for all to see. She says I have those things on my car because of her younger brother (certainly not her, too). He would not like them, either.We all need to support our children and love them no matter what, but not everyone else has to. They don't walk in our shoes, and until they do, most of them will never understand our sitiation, and don't care to, either.I was appalled at the radio announcer's comments, but over the years, I have just chalked it up to, "What a sorry, insensitive, uneducated person that is!" and just feel sorry for them that they will never understand the kind of deep, deep love, patience, and understanding of others' weaknesses that we parents have been educated on with these kids of ours.This is not meant to antagonize anyone, it is simply my humble opinion, based on my own personal experiences. I love my chidren, know their rights, but we all have to be considerate of others' rights, too.One reccomendation to the parent who posted that they have to walk by all the empty handicapped spots...if your child is a runner and it is dangerous for him/her to walk any distance safely to a store, your physician should be able to get you a handicapped plate for your vehicle. This was mentioned to me years ago. Just a thought. It seems sometimes that there are all these empty handicapped spots, but with 27% plus of the population being handicapped in some way, they still don't have 27% of the spots on the lot earmarked as such.Okay, everyone can blast me now. S.

[Guest guest]

,

The artwork is up for auction on ebay. I can post it in my pix in the group if no one minds. I want everyone to be aware that I'm not trying to pawn my wares here. I will post the picture of the painting if anyone objects let me know and I'll remove them.

----- Original Message -----

From: Cochran

Sent: 6/2/2006 1:15:19 PM

Subject: Re: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

LOL, well I wasn't thinking particularly of you when I wrote that, just all women, in general, of which I am one. And there are times when emotion and extraneous sublties are an issue with something and times when it is not. The wisdom is, as they say, knowing when to apply it and when to leave it out. Like everyone, still working on that.

Can you bring your artwork to the list, , or give me a link, I would love to see it, to analyze it, just kidding :-)

From: rmaher1969@...

Sent: Friday, June 02, 2006 12:16 PM

Subject: Re: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

<< I also have this uncharacteristic female personality that makes me stay on the point, this gets me in trouble with women frequently who want to bring emotion and other extraneous detail into a conversation which I view as black and white. This may be a function of my personality or a function of my profession. >>

>>>>>What? Why is everyone looking at me??!!

----- Original Message -----

From: Cochran

Sent: 6/2/2006 12:07:09 PM

Subject: Re: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

Hi ,

Thanks for posting, I'm not going to blast you, but I am confused, not by what you posted, I think that was great, but I think I must have missed the point of the radio segment.

I think a caller is the one who suggested that "parents with disabled add,adhd kids should not eat out in public" The radio station is not responsible for the comments of the viewers, don't think. I did find that comment offensive.

I thought the point was "If a child is making a scene/having a meltdown in a restaurant, what should be done." Was that not the point? I thought it was then there was all this posting about moving your seat (which is what I normally do, but let's face it, I'm sure the people with the screaming kid might not take this kindly either) or what is causing the meltdown, which are sensory integration issues, I too am bothered by loud noises and can hear the hum of the fluorescent lights, so I am sensitive to that, but I did not think it was the point.

I think the sensitivity is because the child is handicapped and we can all relate to that. But I don't think it is a handicap problem, there are plenty of badly behaved NT kids, we see them everyday. If I was going to call into the radio station, that is what I would have stated first, and then said, that any child, regardless of any status should not be allowed to disrupt a roomful of restaurant patrons who have paid good money to enjoy their meal. And who wants any kid screaming while you are eating? This is not the time to assert a handicapped child's rights, IMHO.

It also is not analagous to the blind child in the wheelchair unless the parents kept allowing the child to tumble display after display, like the screaming child is allowed to continue screaming and screaming. No human being minds an occasional, short-lived disturbance from any child, much less a handicapped child.

I must apologize, but I have this strange habit of saying what I think after someone asks me what I think, I know that is problematic, but is also a warning if you don't want to know what I think and only want someone to agree with you, I am not your gal. I purposely seek friends, other professionals, drs, etc who are like this. People who will risk me getting angry to say what they really believe, especially when they think I need to hear it, it's important to me, and I know that is not the norm.

I also have this uncharacteristic female personality that makes me stay on the point, this gets me in trouble with women frequently who want to bring emotion and other extraneous detail into a conversation which I view as black and white. This may be a function of my personality or a function of my profession.

Noone loves children more than I do, I have spent most of my career fighting hard for all kids, smart ones, handicapped ones, socially unloved ones, ones with not one decent adult in their family. I love them so much I want them to learn the social mores of groups and to have other people enjoy them and I want them to learn to be good neighbors.

Just my opinion,

----- Original Message -----

From: theautismguru

Sent: Friday, June 02, 2006 11:28 AM

Subject: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

Hi, everyone. I don't post too often, simply no time, but still try to at least read these as I can. I live in Akron. I am a single mom of three, two of which are on the spectrum. (One is my 12 year old daughter, for the poster that said she thought she was the only mom with a girl on this group!).I, too, am always dismayed at non-autism supporters' comments, like this person on the radio. If we didn't have someone we love with autism, we would not be as in 'in-tuned' to this population as we are now. We have to take some of this with a grain of salt. Please do not take what I am going to write as being insulting or anything. It isn't meant to be. My kids were runners and my 9 yr. old son with autism still speaks as if he is is yelling (even sounding angry at times, when he is clearly not). I, too, have been on both sides of the fence. I didn't take my children, when younger, to nice restaurants and allow them to scream just because they "had the right" to be there, too. My children do not have the right to ruin everyone else's nice evenings out. Those folks are paying for their dinners because they wanted a break and a nice evening out, also, or are taking a night out away from their own children. Of course, our kids need to learn to act appropriately in a public place or restaurant! But sometimes that means taking baby steps, or as Dr. Jensen pointed out to me years ago, even if it means you ask to be seated, order water and then leave at that time, until you can work up to then ordering, then waiting patiently, then on and on. baby steps. My children were removed immediately and our food was packed up when they were little if they had horrible restaurant or public behaviors. I had to sometimes pay a sitter just to run simple errands, because my kids could not handle more than one 5 minute errand at a time. Nothing seemed to get done on MY schedule. I have seen many parents, even those with kids on the spectrum, decide that THEY want a night out, have no sitter and they are not going to let their child stop them from dining out, and so allow their child to scream, only for me to see that they didn't bring anything to entertain the child with, or they were too engrossed in their adult conversation and ignoring their child's need for whatever. We've all seen this with typical kids, but it happens with parents of kids on the spectrum also. I never had an adult conversation in public as long as my children were present, or we didn't get through a meal.The radio person was simply stating their opinion, as we all are doing over this. Yes, it angers me, too, but I believe she just needs to be educated to some degree, but that doesn't mean it will stop her comments. She, like all of us, have the right to speak our minds freely. Maybe she should be invited to a meeting of the local autism society, but would any of us somewhere we'd be bashed on over and over again? I guess I have become calmer over the years, and at times, have learned to just brush off uneducated people. You aren't going to change them anyways. I have learned to ignore inconsiderate people. Do what it takes to support your child and your family. NO one else matters on the short or long run.Am I big on awareness? you bet. I am the one with the AUTISM license plate in Summit County (which some people find offensive that I put my children's disability on my actual plate). I have an "I LOVE SOMEONE WITH AUTISM" bumper sticker next to it on one side and another bumper sticker about finding the cure". I am all about awareness, always have been. I tell store clerks and everyone in line that my child is on the autism spectrum. But now that they are older, and comprehending everything I say, I think it is now infringing on their right to privacy at times, and to not be labelled publicly, and to not display their disabiity so proudly. My plate will be changing when it expires soon, and available to anyone who wishes to have it next. This and my bumper stickers has gotten me to talk to people I would never have met otherwise, given me a chance to talk to other parents, grandparents, neighbors, etc. of families that live with or know someone with autism. I have had thumbs up at red lights, or someone pulling up alongside me, honking their horn, saying "I also have a child (or brother) with autism". We are all out there. It's been a great public educator, in my opinion. I thought about the t-shirts another group member posted, even looked into an ebay business for it, with comments like, "I stim, therefore, I am", or "Questions about autism?...just ask my mom", and others. They work with small children, and on adults, but my daughter would be HORRIFIED now if her disability was made public for all to see. She says I have those things on my car because of her younger brother (certainly not her, too). He would not like them, either.We all need to support our children and love them no matter what, but not everyone else has to. They don't walk in our shoes, and until they do, most of them will never understand our sitiation, and don't care to, either.I was appalled at the radio announcer's comments, but over the years, I have just chalked it up to, "What a sorry, insensitive, uneducated person that is!" and just feel sorry for them that they will never understand the kind of deep, deep love, patience, and understanding of others' weaknesses that we parents have been educated on with these kids of ours.This is not meant to antagonize anyone, it is simply my humble opinion, based on my own personal experiences. I love my chidren, know their rights, but we all have to be considerate of others' rights, too.One reccomendation to the parent who posted that they have to walk by all the empty handicapped spots...if your child is a runner and it is dangerous for him/her to walk any distance safely to a store, your physician should be able to get you a handicapped plate for your vehicle. This was mentioned to me years ago. Just a thought. It seems sometimes that there are all these empty handicapped spots, but with 27% plus of the population being handicapped in some way, they still don't have 27% of the spots on the lot earmarked as such.Okay, everyone can blast me now. S.

[Guest guest]

You know the saying

"Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they aren't out to get you!"

May I ask, where did you get the Focus Factor? Is it available in healthfood stores? Does it contain copper? We have stopped diet and enzymes and we haven't seen any regression. We're looking to pare down some of the bio-med stuff to free up some $$ but we aren't willing to risk regression. Thinking about taking a break from chelating with both DMSA and ALA and going to just ALA temporarlily. Also, we have been treating with a yeast protocol for almost a year, in spite of the fact that we never see any symptoms of yeast overgrowth. it was part of the "everything & the kitchen sink" mentality to cover any problems caused by chelating. I think we are going to break from the Sacroboullardi and stay with just probiotics for now. Unless we start seeing yeast issues, I don't see the point. I plan to make a trip to the HFS for some supps this weekend and I'll check out the Focus Factor. Thanks for the info.

----- Original Message -----

From: Cochran

Sent: 6/2/2006 1:15:19 PM

Subject: Re: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

LOL, well I wasn't thinking particularly of you when I wrote that, just all women, in general, of which I am one. And there are times when emotion and extraneous sublties are an issue with something and times when it is not. The wisdom is, as they say, knowing when to apply it and when to leave it out. Like everyone, still working on that.

Can you bring your artwork to the list, , or give me a link, I would love to see it, to analyze it, just kidding :-)

From: rmaher1969@...

Sent: Friday, June 02, 2006 12:16 PM

Subject: Re: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

<< I also have this uncharacteristic female personality that makes me stay on the point, this gets me in trouble with women frequently who want to bring emotion and other extraneous detail into a conversation which I view as black and white. This may be a function of my personality or a function of my profession. >>

>>>>>What? Why is everyone looking at me??!!

----- Original Message -----

From: Cochran

Sent: 6/2/2006 12:07:09 PM

Subject: Re: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

Hi ,

Thanks for posting, I'm not going to blast you, but I am confused, not by what you posted, I think that was great, but I think I must have missed the point of the radio segment.

I think a caller is the one who suggested that "parents with disabled add,adhd kids should not eat out in public" The radio station is not responsible for the comments of the viewers, don't think. I did find that comment offensive.

I thought the point was "If a child is making a scene/having a meltdown in a restaurant, what should be done." Was that not the point? I thought it was then there was all this posting about moving your seat (which is what I normally do, but let's face it, I'm sure the people with the screaming kid might not take this kindly either) or what is causing the meltdown, which are sensory integration issues, I too am bothered by loud noises and can hear the hum of the fluorescent lights, so I am sensitive to that, but I did not think it was the point.

I think the sensitivity is because the child is handicapped and we can all relate to that. But I don't think it is a handicap problem, there are plenty of badly behaved NT kids, we see them everyday. If I was going to call into the radio station, that is what I would have stated first, and then said, that any child, regardless of any status should not be allowed to disrupt a roomful of restaurant patrons who have paid good money to enjoy their meal. And who wants any kid screaming while you are eating? This is not the time to assert a handicapped child's rights, IMHO.

It also is not analagous to the blind child in the wheelchair unless the parents kept allowing the child to tumble display after display, like the screaming child is allowed to continue screaming and screaming. No human being minds an occasional, short-lived disturbance from any child, much less a handicapped child.

I must apologize, but I have this strange habit of saying what I think after someone asks me what I think, I know that is problematic, but is also a warning if you don't want to know what I think and only want someone to agree with you, I am not your gal. I purposely seek friends, other professionals, drs, etc who are like this. People who will risk me getting angry to say what they really believe, especially when they think I need to hear it, it's important to me, and I know that is not the norm.

I also have this uncharacteristic female personality that makes me stay on the point, this gets me in trouble with women frequently who want to bring emotion and other extraneous detail into a conversation which I view as black and white. This may be a function of my personality or a function of my profession.

Noone loves children more than I do, I have spent most of my career fighting hard for all kids, smart ones, handicapped ones, socially unloved ones, ones with not one decent adult in their family. I love them so much I want them to learn the social mores of groups and to have other people enjoy them and I want them to learn to be good neighbors.

Just my opinion,

----- Original Message -----

From: theautismguru

Sent: Friday, June 02, 2006 11:28 AM

Subject: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

Hi, everyone. I don't post too often, simply no time, but still try to at least read these as I can. I live in Akron. I am a single mom of three, two of which are on the spectrum. (One is my 12 year old daughter, for the poster that said she thought she was the only mom with a girl on this group!).I, too, am always dismayed at non-autism supporters' comments, like this person on the radio. If we didn't have someone we love with autism, we would not be as in 'in-tuned' to this population as we are now. We have to take some of this with a grain of salt. Please do not take what I am going to write as being insulting or anything. It isn't meant to be. My kids were runners and my 9 yr. old son with autism still speaks as if he is is yelling (even sounding angry at times, when he is clearly not). I, too, have been on both sides of the fence. I didn't take my children, when younger, to nice restaurants and allow them to scream just because they "had the right" to be there, too. My children do not have the right to ruin everyone else's nice evenings out. Those folks are paying for their dinners because they wanted a break and a nice evening out, also, or are taking a night out away from their own children. Of course, our kids need to learn to act appropriately in a public place or restaurant! But sometimes that means taking baby steps, or as Dr. Jensen pointed out to me years ago, even if it means you ask to be seated, order water and then leave at that time, until you can work up to then ordering, then waiting patiently, then on and on. baby steps. My children were removed immediately and our food was packed up when they were little if they had horrible restaurant or public behaviors. I had to sometimes pay a sitter just to run simple errands, because my kids could not handle more than one 5 minute errand at a time. Nothing seemed to get done on MY schedule. I have seen many parents, even those with kids on the spectrum, decide that THEY want a night out, have no sitter and they are not going to let their child stop them from dining out, and so allow their child to scream, only for me to see that they didn't bring anything to entertain the child with, or they were too engrossed in their adult conversation and ignoring their child's need for whatever. We've all seen this with typical kids, but it happens with parents of kids on the spectrum also. I never had an adult conversation in public as long as my children were present, or we didn't get through a meal.The radio person was simply stating their opinion, as we all are doing over this. Yes, it angers me, too, but I believe she just needs to be educated to some degree, but that doesn't mean it will stop her comments. She, like all of us, have the right to speak our minds freely. Maybe she should be invited to a meeting of the local autism society, but would any of us somewhere we'd be bashed on over and over again? I guess I have become calmer over the years, and at times, have learned to just brush off uneducated people. You aren't going to change them anyways. I have learned to ignore inconsiderate people. Do what it takes to support your child and your family. NO one else matters on the short or long run.Am I big on awareness? you bet. I am the one with the AUTISM license plate in Summit County (which some people find offensive that I put my children's disability on my actual plate). I have an "I LOVE SOMEONE WITH AUTISM" bumper sticker next to it on one side and another bumper sticker about finding the cure". I am all about awareness, always have been. I tell store clerks and everyone in line that my child is on the autism spectrum. But now that they are older, and comprehending everything I say, I think it is now infringing on their right to privacy at times, and to not be labelled publicly, and to not display their disabiity so proudly. My plate will be changing when it expires soon, and available to anyone who wishes to have it next. This and my bumper stickers has gotten me to talk to people I would never have met otherwise, given me a chance to talk to other parents, grandparents, neighbors, etc. of families that live with or know someone with autism. I have had thumbs up at red lights, or someone pulling up alongside me, honking their horn, saying "I also have a child (or brother) with autism". We are all out there. It's been a great public educator, in my opinion. I thought about the t-shirts another group member posted, even looked into an ebay business for it, with comments like, "I stim, therefore, I am", or "Questions about autism?...just ask my mom", and others. They work with small children, and on adults, but my daughter would be HORRIFIED now if her disability was made public for all to see. She says I have those things on my car because of her younger brother (certainly not her, too). He would not like them, either.We all need to support our children and love them no matter what, but not everyone else has to. They don't walk in our shoes, and until they do, most of them will never understand our sitiation, and don't care to, either.I was appalled at the radio announcer's comments, but over the years, I have just chalked it up to, "What a sorry, insensitive, uneducated person that is!" and just feel sorry for them that they will never understand the kind of deep, deep love, patience, and understanding of others' weaknesses that we parents have been educated on with these kids of ours.This is not meant to antagonize anyone, it is simply my humble opinion, based on my own personal experiences. I love my chidren, know their rights, but we all have to be considerate of others' rights, too.One reccomendation to the parent who posted that they have to walk by all the empty handicapped spots...if your child is a runner and it is dangerous for him/her to walk any distance safely to a store, your physician should be able to get you a handicapped plate for your vehicle. This was mentioned to me years ago. Just a thought. It seems sometimes that there are all these empty handicapped spots, but with 27% plus of the population being handicapped in some way, they still don't have 27% of the spots on the lot earmarked as such.Okay, everyone can blast me now. S.

[Guest guest]

Is Transfer Factor, is at www.4LifeCenter.com. Focus factor is for add, lol Course you could try that also.

I just read Baker and Pangborn's Autism Biomedical book and they raved about Sac Boullardi, said it was much better than probiotics. Also, Ala is fine alone, just be very careful to keep the dosing at 3 hours, no longer, but you can do 4 at night, due to lower metabolism as they are sleeping.

----- Original Message -----

From: rmaher1969@...

Sent: Friday, June 02, 2006 1:41 PM

Subject: Re: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

You know the saying

"Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they aren't out to get you!"

May I ask, where did you get the Focus Factor? Is it available in healthfood stores? Does it contain copper? We have stopped diet and enzymes and we haven't seen any regression. We're looking to pare down some of the bio-med stuff to free up some $$ but we aren't willing to risk regression. Thinking about taking a break from chelating with both DMSA and ALA and going to just ALA temporarlily. Also, we have been treating with a yeast protocol for almost a year, in spite of the fact that we never see any symptoms of yeast overgrowth. it was part of the "everything & the kitchen sink" mentality to cover any problems caused by chelating. I think we are going to break from the Sacroboullardi and stay with just probiotics for now. Unless we start seeing yeast issues, I don't see the point. I plan to make a trip to the HFS for some supps this weekend and I'll check out the Focus Factor. Thanks for the info.

----- Original Message -----

From: Cochran

Sent: 6/2/2006 1:15:19 PM

Subject: Re: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

LOL, well I wasn't thinking particularly of you when I wrote that, just all women, in general, of which I am one. And there are times when emotion and extraneous sublties are an issue with something and times when it is not. The wisdom is, as they say, knowing when to apply it and when to leave it out. Like everyone, still working on that.

Can you bring your artwork to the list, , or give me a link, I would love to see it, to analyze it, just kidding :-)

From: rmaher1969@...

Sent: Friday, June 02, 2006 12:16 PM

Subject: Re: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

<< I also have this uncharacteristic female personality that makes me stay on the point, this gets me in trouble with women frequently who want to bring emotion and other extraneous detail into a conversation which I view as black and white. This may be a function of my personality or a function of my profession. >>

>>>>>What? Why is everyone looking at me??!!

----- Original Message -----

From: Cochran

Sent: 6/2/2006 12:07:09 PM

Subject: Re: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

Hi ,

Thanks for posting, I'm not going to blast you, but I am confused, not by what you posted, I think that was great, but I think I must have missed the point of the radio segment.

I think a caller is the one who suggested that "parents with disabled add,adhd kids should not eat out in public" The radio station is not responsible for the comments of the viewers, don't think. I did find that comment offensive.

I thought the point was "If a child is making a scene/having a meltdown in a restaurant, what should be done." Was that not the point? I thought it was then there was all this posting about moving your seat (which is what I normally do, but let's face it, I'm sure the people with the screaming kid might not take this kindly either) or what is causing the meltdown, which are sensory integration issues, I too am bothered by loud noises and can hear the hum of the fluorescent lights, so I am sensitive to that, but I did not think it was the point.

I think the sensitivity is because the child is handicapped and we can all relate to that. But I don't think it is a handicap problem, there are plenty of badly behaved NT kids, we see them everyday. If I was going to call into the radio station, that is what I would have stated first, and then said, that any child, regardless of any status should not be allowed to disrupt a roomful of restaurant patrons who have paid good money to enjoy their meal. And who wants any kid screaming while you are eating? This is not the time to assert a handicapped child's rights, IMHO.

It also is not analagous to the blind child in the wheelchair unless the parents kept allowing the child to tumble display after display, like the screaming child is allowed to continue screaming and screaming. No human being minds an occasional, short-lived disturbance from any child, much less a handicapped child.

I must apologize, but I have this strange habit of saying what I think after someone asks me what I think, I know that is problematic, but is also a warning if you don't want to know what I think and only want someone to agree with you, I am not your gal. I purposely seek friends, other professionals, drs, etc who are like this. People who will risk me getting angry to say what they really believe, especially when they think I need to hear it, it's important to me, and I know that is not the norm.

I also have this uncharacteristic female personality that makes me stay on the point, this gets me in trouble with women frequently who want to bring emotion and other extraneous detail into a conversation which I view as black and white. This may be a function of my personality or a function of my profession.

Noone loves children more than I do, I have spent most of my career fighting hard for all kids, smart ones, handicapped ones, socially unloved ones, ones with not one decent adult in their family. I love them so much I want them to learn the social mores of groups and to have other people enjoy them and I want them to learn to be good neighbors.

Just my opinion,

----- Original Message -----

From: theautismguru

Sent: Friday, June 02, 2006 11:28 AM

Subject: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

Hi, everyone. I don't post too often, simply no time, but still try to at least read these as I can. I live in Akron. I am a single mom of three, two of which are on the spectrum. (One is my 12 year old daughter, for the poster that said she thought she was the only mom with a girl on this group!).I, too, am always dismayed at non-autism supporters' comments, like this person on the radio. If we didn't have someone we love with autism, we would not be as in 'in-tuned' to this population as we are now. We have to take some of this with a grain of salt. Please do not take what I am going to write as being insulting or anything. It isn't meant to be. My kids were runners and my 9 yr. old son with autism still speaks as if he is is yelling (even sounding angry at times, when he is clearly not). I, too, have been on both sides of the fence. I didn't take my children, when younger, to nice restaurants and allow them to scream just because they "had the right" to be there, too. My children do not have the right to ruin everyone else's nice evenings out. Those folks are paying for their dinners because they wanted a break and a nice evening out, also, or are taking a night out away from their own children. Of course, our kids need to learn to act appropriately in a public place or restaurant! But sometimes that means taking baby steps, or as Dr. Jensen pointed out to me years ago, even if it means you ask to be seated, order water and then leave at that time, until you can work up to then ordering, then waiting patiently, then on and on. baby steps. My children were removed immediately and our food was packed up when they were little if they had horrible restaurant or public behaviors. I had to sometimes pay a sitter just to run simple errands, because my kids could not handle more than one 5 minute errand at a time. Nothing seemed to get done on MY schedule. I have seen many parents, even those with kids on the spectrum, decide that THEY want a night out, have no sitter and they are not going to let their child stop them from dining out, and so allow their child to scream, only for me to see that they didn't bring anything to entertain the child with, or they were too engrossed in their adult conversation and ignoring their child's need for whatever. We've all seen this with typical kids, but it happens with parents of kids on the spectrum also. I never had an adult conversation in public as long as my children were present, or we didn't get through a meal.The radio person was simply stating their opinion, as we all are doing over this. Yes, it angers me, too, but I believe she just needs to be educated to some degree, but that doesn't mean it will stop her comments. She, like all of us, have the right to speak our minds freely. Maybe she should be invited to a meeting of the local autism society, but would any of us somewhere we'd be bashed on over and over again? I guess I have become calmer over the years, and at times, have learned to just brush off uneducated people. You aren't going to change them anyways. I have learned to ignore inconsiderate people. Do what it takes to support your child and your family. NO one else matters on the short or long run.Am I big on awareness? you bet. I am the one with the AUTISM license plate in Summit County (which some people find offensive that I put my children's disability on my actual plate). I have an "I LOVE SOMEONE WITH AUTISM" bumper sticker next to it on one side and another bumper sticker about finding the cure". I am all about awareness, always have been. I tell store clerks and everyone in line that my child is on the autism spectrum. But now that they are older, and comprehending everything I say, I think it is now infringing on their right to privacy at times, and to not be labelled publicly, and to not display their disabiity so proudly. My plate will be changing when it expires soon, and available to anyone who wishes to have it next. This and my bumper stickers has gotten me to talk to people I would never have met otherwise, given me a chance to talk to other parents, grandparents, neighbors, etc. of families that live with or know someone with autism. I have had thumbs up at red lights, or someone pulling up alongside me, honking their horn, saying "I also have a child (or brother) with autism". We are all out there. It's been a great public educator, in my opinion. I thought about the t-shirts another group member posted, even looked into an ebay business for it, with comments like, "I stim, therefore, I am", or "Questions about autism?...just ask my mom", and others. They work with small children, and on adults, but my daughter would be HORRIFIED now if her disability was made public for all to see. She says I have those things on my car because of her younger brother (certainly not her, too). He would not like them, either.We all need to support our children and love them no matter what, but not everyone else has to. They don't walk in our shoes, and until they do, most of them will never understand our sitiation, and don't care to, either.I was appalled at the radio announcer's comments, but over the years, I have just chalked it up to, "What a sorry, insensitive, uneducated person that is!" and just feel sorry for them that they will never understand the kind of deep, deep love, patience, and understanding of others' weaknesses that we parents have been educated on with these kids of ours.This is not meant to antagonize anyone, it is simply my humble opinion, based on my own personal experiences. I love my chidren, know their rights, but we all have to be considerate of others' rights, too.One reccomendation to the parent who posted that they have to walk by all the empty handicapped spots...if your child is a runner and it is dangerous for him/her to walk any distance safely to a store, your physician should be able to get you a handicapped plate for your vehicle. This was mentioned to me years ago. Just a thought. It seems sometimes that there are all these empty handicapped spots, but with 27% plus of the population being handicapped in some way, they still don't have 27% of the spots on the lot earmarked as such.Okay, everyone can blast me now. S.

[Guest guest]

<<Focus factor is for add, lol Course you could try that also. >>

LOL, for whom? Me or my son? Sorry, Tranfer Factor, got it now. Thanks

----- Original Message -----

From: Cochran

Sent: 6/2/2006 3:22:06 PM

Subject: Re: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

Is Transfer Factor, is at www.4LifeCenter.com. Focus factor is for add, lol Course you could try that also.

I just read Baker and Pangborn's Autism Biomedical book and they raved about Sac Boullardi, said it was much better than probiotics. Also, Ala is fine alone, just be very careful to keep the dosing at 3 hours, no longer, but you can do 4 at night, due to lower metabolism as they are sleeping.

----- Original Message -----

From: rmaher1969@...

Sent: Friday, June 02, 2006 1:41 PM

Subject: Re: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

You know the saying

"Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they aren't out to get you!"

May I ask, where did you get the Focus Factor? Is it available in healthfood stores? Does it contain copper? We have stopped diet and enzymes and we haven't seen any regression. We're looking to pare down some of the bio-med stuff to free up some $$ but we aren't willing to risk regression. Thinking about taking a break from chelating with both DMSA and ALA and going to just ALA temporarlily. Also, we have been treating with a yeast protocol for almost a year, in spite of the fact that we never see any symptoms of yeast overgrowth. it was part of the "everything & the kitchen sink" mentality to cover any problems caused by chelating. I think we are going to break from the Sacroboullardi and stay with just probiotics for now. Unless we start seeing yeast issues, I don't see the point. I plan to make a trip to the HFS for some supps this weekend and I'll check out the Focus Factor. Thanks for the info.

----- Original Message -----

From: Cochran

Sent: 6/2/2006 1:15:19 PM

Subject: Re: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

LOL, well I wasn't thinking particularly of you when I wrote that, just all women, in general, of which I am one. And there are times when emotion and extraneous sublties are an issue with something and times when it is not. The wisdom is, as they say, knowing when to apply it and when to leave it out. Like everyone, still working on that.

Can you bring your artwork to the list, , or give me a link, I would love to see it, to analyze it, just kidding :-)

From: rmaher1969@...

Sent: Friday, June 02, 2006 12:16 PM

Subject: Re: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

<< I also have this uncharacteristic female personality that makes me stay on the point, this gets me in trouble with women frequently who want to bring emotion and other extraneous detail into a conversation which I view as black and white. This may be a function of my personality or a function of my profession. >>

>>>>>What? Why is everyone looking at me??!!

----- Original Message -----

From: Cochran

Sent: 6/2/2006 12:07:09 PM

Subject: Re: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

Hi ,

Thanks for posting, I'm not going to blast you, but I am confused, not by what you posted, I think that was great, but I think I must have missed the point of the radio segment.

I think a caller is the one who suggested that "parents with disabled add,adhd kids should not eat out in public" The radio station is not responsible for the comments of the viewers, don't think. I did find that comment offensive.

I thought the point was "If a child is making a scene/having a meltdown in a restaurant, what should be done." Was that not the point? I thought it was then there was all this posting about moving your seat (which is what I normally do, but let's face it, I'm sure the people with the screaming kid might not take this kindly either) or what is causing the meltdown, which are sensory integration issues, I too am bothered by loud noises and can hear the hum of the fluorescent lights, so I am sensitive to that, but I did not think it was the point.

I think the sensitivity is because the child is handicapped and we can all relate to that. But I don't think it is a handicap problem, there are plenty of badly behaved NT kids, we see them everyday. If I was going to call into the radio station, that is what I would have stated first, and then said, that any child, regardless of any status should not be allowed to disrupt a roomful of restaurant patrons who have paid good money to enjoy their meal. And who wants any kid screaming while you are eating? This is not the time to assert a handicapped child's rights, IMHO.

It also is not analagous to the blind child in the wheelchair unless the parents kept allowing the child to tumble display after display, like the screaming child is allowed to continue screaming and screaming. No human being minds an occasional, short-lived disturbance from any child, much less a handicapped child.

I must apologize, but I have this strange habit of saying what I think after someone asks me what I think, I know that is problematic, but is also a warning if you don't want to know what I think and only want someone to agree with you, I am not your gal. I purposely seek friends, other professionals, drs, etc who are like this. People who will risk me getting angry to say what they really believe, especially when they think I need to hear it, it's important to me, and I know that is not the norm.

I also have this uncharacteristic female personality that makes me stay on the point, this gets me in trouble with women frequently who want to bring emotion and other extraneous detail into a conversation which I view as black and white. This may be a function of my personality or a function of my profession.

Noone loves children more than I do, I have spent most of my career fighting hard for all kids, smart ones, handicapped ones, socially unloved ones, ones with not one decent adult in their family. I love them so much I want them to learn the social mores of groups and to have other people enjoy them and I want them to learn to be good neighbors.

Just my opinion,

----- Original Message -----

From: theautismguru

Sent: Friday, June 02, 2006 11:28 AM

Subject: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

Hi, everyone. I don't post too often, simply no time, but still try to at least read these as I can. I live in Akron. I am a single mom of three, two of which are on the spectrum. (One is my 12 year old daughter, for the poster that said she thought she was the only mom with a girl on this group!).I, too, am always dismayed at non-autism supporters' comments, like this person on the radio. If we didn't have someone we love with autism, we would not be as in 'in-tuned' to this population as we are now. We have to take some of this with a grain of salt. Please do not take what I am going to write as being insulting or anything. It isn't meant to be. My kids were runners and my 9 yr. old son with autism still speaks as if he is is yelling (even sounding angry at times, when he is clearly not). I, too, have been on both sides of the fence. I didn't take my children, when younger, to nice restaurants and allow them to scream just because they "had the right" to be there, too. My children do not have the right to ruin everyone else's nice evenings out. Those folks are paying for their dinners because they wanted a break and a nice evening out, also, or are taking a night out away from their own children. Of course, our kids need to learn to act appropriately in a public place or restaurant! But sometimes that means taking baby steps, or as Dr. Jensen pointed out to me years ago, even if it means you ask to be seated, order water and then leave at that time, until you can work up to then ordering, then waiting patiently, then on and on. baby steps. My children were removed immediately and our food was packed up when they were little if they had horrible restaurant or public behaviors. I had to sometimes pay a sitter just to run simple errands, because my kids could not handle more than one 5 minute errand at a time. Nothing seemed to get done on MY schedule. I have seen many parents, even those with kids on the spectrum, decide that THEY want a night out, have no sitter and they are not going to let their child stop them from dining out, and so allow their child to scream, only for me to see that they didn't bring anything to entertain the child with, or they were too engrossed in their adult conversation and ignoring their child's need for whatever. We've all seen this with typical kids, but it happens with parents of kids on the spectrum also. I never had an adult conversation in public as long as my children were present, or we didn't get through a meal.The radio person was simply stating their opinion, as we all are doing over this. Yes, it angers me, too, but I believe she just needs to be educated to some degree, but that doesn't mean it will stop her comments. She, like all of us, have the right to speak our minds freely. Maybe she should be invited to a meeting of the local autism society, but would any of us somewhere we'd be bashed on over and over again? I guess I have become calmer over the years, and at times, have learned to just brush off uneducated people. You aren't going to change them anyways. I have learned to ignore inconsiderate people. Do what it takes to support your child and your family. NO one else matters on the short or long run.Am I big on awareness? you bet. I am the one with the AUTISM license plate in Summit County (which some people find offensive that I put my children's disability on my actual plate). I have an "I LOVE SOMEONE WITH AUTISM" bumper sticker next to it on one side and another bumper sticker about finding the cure". I am all about awareness, always have been. I tell store clerks and everyone in line that my child is on the autism spectrum. But now that they are older, and comprehending everything I say, I think it is now infringing on their right to privacy at times, and to not be labelled publicly, and to not display their disabiity so proudly. My plate will be changing when it expires soon, and available to anyone who wishes to have it next. This and my bumper stickers has gotten me to talk to people I would never have met otherwise, given me a chance to talk to other parents, grandparents, neighbors, etc. of families that live with or know someone with autism. I have had thumbs up at red lights, or someone pulling up alongside me, honking their horn, saying "I also have a child (or brother) with autism". We are all out there. It's been a great public educator, in my opinion. I thought about the t-shirts another group member posted, even looked into an ebay business for it, with comments like, "I stim, therefore, I am", or "Questions about autism?...just ask my mom", and others. They work with small children, and on adults, but my daughter would be HORRIFIED now if her disability was made public for all to see. She says I have those things on my car because of her younger brother (certainly not her, too). He would not like them, either.We all need to support our children and love them no matter what, but not everyone else has to. They don't walk in our shoes, and until they do, most of them will never understand our sitiation, and don't care to, either.I was appalled at the radio announcer's comments, but over the years, I have just chalked it up to, "What a sorry, insensitive, uneducated person that is!" and just feel sorry for them that they will never understand the kind of deep, deep love, patience, and understanding of others' weaknesses that we parents have been educated on with these kids of ours.This is not meant to antagonize anyone, it is simply my humble opinion, based on my own personal experiences. I love my chidren, know their rights, but we all have to be considerate of others' rights, too.One reccomendation to the parent who posted that they have to walk by all the empty handicapped spots...if your child is a runner and it is dangerous for him/her to walk any distance safely to a store, your physician should be able to get you a handicapped plate for your vehicle. This was mentioned to me years ago. Just a thought. It seems sometimes that there are all these empty handicapped spots, but with 27% plus of the population being handicapped in some way, they still don't have 27% of the spots on the lot earmarked as such.Okay, everyone can blast me now. S.

[Guest guest]

Need some focus factor myself, forgot to add it has no copper.

----- Original Message -----

From: rmaher1969@...

Sent: Friday, June 02, 2006 1:41 PM

Subject: Re: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

You know the saying

"Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they aren't out to get you!"

May I ask, where did you get the Focus Factor? Is it available in healthfood stores? Does it contain copper? We have stopped diet and enzymes and we haven't seen any regression. We're looking to pare down some of the bio-med stuff to free up some $$ but we aren't willing to risk regression. Thinking about taking a break from chelating with both DMSA and ALA and going to just ALA temporarlily. Also, we have been treating with a yeast protocol for almost a year, in spite of the fact that we never see any symptoms of yeast overgrowth. it was part of the "everything & the kitchen sink" mentality to cover any problems caused by chelating. I think we are going to break from the Sacroboullardi and stay with just probiotics for now. Unless we start seeing yeast issues, I don't see the point. I plan to make a trip to the HFS for some supps this weekend and I'll check out the Focus Factor. Thanks for the info.

----- Original Message -----

From: Cochran

Sent: 6/2/2006 1:15:19 PM

Subject: Re: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

LOL, well I wasn't thinking particularly of you when I wrote that, just all women, in general, of which I am one. And there are times when emotion and extraneous sublties are an issue with something and times when it is not. The wisdom is, as they say, knowing when to apply it and when to leave it out. Like everyone, still working on that.

Can you bring your artwork to the list, , or give me a link, I would love to see it, to analyze it, just kidding :-)

From: rmaher1969@...

Sent: Friday, June 02, 2006 12:16 PM

Subject: Re: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

<< I also have this uncharacteristic female personality that makes me stay on the point, this gets me in trouble with women frequently who want to bring emotion and other extraneous detail into a conversation which I view as black and white. This may be a function of my personality or a function of my profession. >>

>>>>>What? Why is everyone looking at me??!!

----- Original Message -----

From: Cochran

Sent: 6/2/2006 12:07:09 PM

Subject: Re: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

Hi ,

Thanks for posting, I'm not going to blast you, but I am confused, not by what you posted, I think that was great, but I think I must have missed the point of the radio segment.

I think a caller is the one who suggested that "parents with disabled add,adhd kids should not eat out in public" The radio station is not responsible for the comments of the viewers, don't think. I did find that comment offensive.

I thought the point was "If a child is making a scene/having a meltdown in a restaurant, what should be done." Was that not the point? I thought it was then there was all this posting about moving your seat (which is what I normally do, but let's face it, I'm sure the people with the screaming kid might not take this kindly either) or what is causing the meltdown, which are sensory integration issues, I too am bothered by loud noises and can hear the hum of the fluorescent lights, so I am sensitive to that, but I did not think it was the point.

I think the sensitivity is because the child is handicapped and we can all relate to that. But I don't think it is a handicap problem, there are plenty of badly behaved NT kids, we see them everyday. If I was going to call into the radio station, that is what I would have stated first, and then said, that any child, regardless of any status should not be allowed to disrupt a roomful of restaurant patrons who have paid good money to enjoy their meal. And who wants any kid screaming while you are eating? This is not the time to assert a handicapped child's rights, IMHO.

It also is not analagous to the blind child in the wheelchair unless the parents kept allowing the child to tumble display after display, like the screaming child is allowed to continue screaming and screaming. No human being minds an occasional, short-lived disturbance from any child, much less a handicapped child.

I must apologize, but I have this strange habit of saying what I think after someone asks me what I think, I know that is problematic, but is also a warning if you don't want to know what I think and only want someone to agree with you, I am not your gal. I purposely seek friends, other professionals, drs, etc who are like this. People who will risk me getting angry to say what they really believe, especially when they think I need to hear it, it's important to me, and I know that is not the norm.

I also have this uncharacteristic female personality that makes me stay on the point, this gets me in trouble with women frequently who want to bring emotion and other extraneous detail into a conversation which I view as black and white. This may be a function of my personality or a function of my profession.

Noone loves children more than I do, I have spent most of my career fighting hard for all kids, smart ones, handicapped ones, socially unloved ones, ones with not one decent adult in their family. I love them so much I want them to learn the social mores of groups and to have other people enjoy them and I want them to learn to be good neighbors.

Just my opinion,

----- Original Message -----

From: theautismguru

Sent: Friday, June 02, 2006 11:28 AM

Subject: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

Hi, everyone. I don't post too often, simply no time, but still try to at least read these as I can. I live in Akron. I am a single mom of three, two of which are on the spectrum. (One is my 12 year old daughter, for the poster that said she thought she was the only mom with a girl on this group!).I, too, am always dismayed at non-autism supporters' comments, like this person on the radio. If we didn't have someone we love with autism, we would not be as in 'in-tuned' to this population as we are now. We have to take some of this with a grain of salt. Please do not take what I am going to write as being insulting or anything. It isn't meant to be. My kids were runners and my 9 yr. old son with autism still speaks as if he is is yelling (even sounding angry at times, when he is clearly not). I, too, have been on both sides of the fence. I didn't take my children, when younger, to nice restaurants and allow them to scream just because they "had the right" to be there, too. My children do not have the right to ruin everyone else's nice evenings out. Those folks are paying for their dinners because they wanted a break and a nice evening out, also, or are taking a night out away from their own children. Of course, our kids need to learn to act appropriately in a public place or restaurant! But sometimes that means taking baby steps, or as Dr. Jensen pointed out to me years ago, even if it means you ask to be seated, order water and then leave at that time, until you can work up to then ordering, then waiting patiently, then on and on. baby steps. My children were removed immediately and our food was packed up when they were little if they had horrible restaurant or public behaviors. I had to sometimes pay a sitter just to run simple errands, because my kids could not handle more than one 5 minute errand at a time. Nothing seemed to get done on MY schedule. I have seen many parents, even those with kids on the spectrum, decide that THEY want a night out, have no sitter and they are not going to let their child stop them from dining out, and so allow their child to scream, only for me to see that they didn't bring anything to entertain the child with, or they were too engrossed in their adult conversation and ignoring their child's need for whatever. We've all seen this with typical kids, but it happens with parents of kids on the spectrum also. I never had an adult conversation in public as long as my children were present, or we didn't get through a meal.The radio person was simply stating their opinion, as we all are doing over this. Yes, it angers me, too, but I believe she just needs to be educated to some degree, but that doesn't mean it will stop her comments. She, like all of us, have the right to speak our minds freely. Maybe she should be invited to a meeting of the local autism society, but would any of us somewhere we'd be bashed on over and over again? I guess I have become calmer over the years, and at times, have learned to just brush off uneducated people. You aren't going to change them anyways. I have learned to ignore inconsiderate people. Do what it takes to support your child and your family. NO one else matters on the short or long run.Am I big on awareness? you bet. I am the one with the AUTISM license plate in Summit County (which some people find offensive that I put my children's disability on my actual plate). I have an "I LOVE SOMEONE WITH AUTISM" bumper sticker next to it on one side and another bumper sticker about finding the cure". I am all about awareness, always have been. I tell store clerks and everyone in line that my child is on the autism spectrum. But now that they are older, and comprehending everything I say, I think it is now infringing on their right to privacy at times, and to not be labelled publicly, and to not display their disabiity so proudly. My plate will be changing when it expires soon, and available to anyone who wishes to have it next. This and my bumper stickers has gotten me to talk to people I would never have met otherwise, given me a chance to talk to other parents, grandparents, neighbors, etc. of families that live with or know someone with autism. I have had thumbs up at red lights, or someone pulling up alongside me, honking their horn, saying "I also have a child (or brother) with autism". We are all out there. It's been a great public educator, in my opinion. I thought about the t-shirts another group member posted, even looked into an ebay business for it, with comments like, "I stim, therefore, I am", or "Questions about autism?...just ask my mom", and others. They work with small children, and on adults, but my daughter would be HORRIFIED now if her disability was made public for all to see. She says I have those things on my car because of her younger brother (certainly not her, too). He would not like them, either.We all need to support our children and love them no matter what, but not everyone else has to. They don't walk in our shoes, and until they do, most of them will never understand our sitiation, and don't care to, either.I was appalled at the radio announcer's comments, but over the years, I have just chalked it up to, "What a sorry, insensitive, uneducated person that is!" and just feel sorry for them that they will never understand the kind of deep, deep love, patience, and understanding of others' weaknesses that we parents have been educated on with these kids of ours.This is not meant to antagonize anyone, it is simply my humble opinion, based on my own personal experiences. I love my chidren, know their rights, but we all have to be considerate of others' rights, too.One reccomendation to the parent who posted that they have to walk by all the empty handicapped spots...if your child is a runner and it is dangerous for him/her to walk any distance safely to a store, your physician should be able to get you a handicapped plate for your vehicle. This was mentioned to me years ago. Just a thought. It seems sometimes that there are all these empty handicapped spots, but with 27% plus of the population being handicapped in some way, they still don't have 27% of the spots on the lot earmarked as such.Okay, everyone can blast me now. S.

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 6/2/2006 11:30:31 AM Eastern Standard Time, theautismguru@... writes:

Okay, everyone can blast me now. S.

No reason to blast you at all! I liked your thoughts!

RoxannaThe only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.Edmond Burke

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 6/2/2006 12:18:08 PM Eastern Standard Time, rmaher1969@... writes:

<< I also have this uncharacteristic female personality that makes me stay on the point, this gets me in trouble with women frequently who want to bring emotion and other extraneous detail into a conversation which I view as black and white. This may be a function of my personality or a function of my profession. >>

>>>>>What? Why is everyone looking at me??!!

Not me. I am a lot like that too. I get in trouble a lot, especially online, because I don't do touchy feely very well. I am, though, totally lost on the conversation now. LOL. I thought someone just called up to complain about a noisy kid. I don't think it had anything to do with handicapped kids but we made it about handicapped kids since, well, that's what we do. lol. It's been a long week so I am not following the thread like a real person would/should.

I don't really mind kids too much unless they are really out of hand. In many cases, I can tell if they are doing so due to problems of autism since I've had two kids with HFA. Other times, the kid is just tired or a brat. And kids with autism have those moments too. I don't mind that as much either. Kids get tired. Kids think about themselves at all times. <g> They need to learn. So that's not such a big problem.

I think the bigger issue is the adult in charge. We are probably more sensitive, as a group, than the average person about disrupting life in the outside world. We deal with it more often. Some people just do not care if they are bothering others. That's just the way life is.

I think the most annoying thing of all to me in public is those adults who think we should all enjoy the show. You know the type - they talk loudly so everyone can hear them discuss the situation with their child. They pretend to beg for quiet or control of the situation but really, they are busy smiling at how cute their kid is and know that everyone around them thinks the kid is so cute too. I hate that!

Second place is the people who are just loud and yell at their kids like they are the only ones in the world. I mean, take the kid aside and discuss it quietly please! Not that I haven't yelled loudly in public on occasion but I hate people who make a habit of it. You know the type - by the end of your shopping trip, you know all the kids names by heart and how they will be punished. lol. And you want to punish the parent instead! lol.

Roxanna ô¿öAutism Happens

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 6/2/2006 1:40:42 PM Eastern Standard Time, rmaher1969@... writes:

The artwork is up for auction on ebay. I can post it in my pix in the group if no one minds. I want everyone to be aware that I'm not trying to pawn my wares here. I will post the picture of the painting if anyone objects let me know and I'll remove them.

LOL. Pawn your wares! How else are you going to get to Sesame place??? Sell sell sell!

RoxannaThe only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.Edmond Burke

[Guest guest]

<<Not me. I am a lot like that too. I get in trouble a lot, especially online, because I don't do touchy feely very well.>>

I think somebody needs a hug!

Seriously, I think for me, the point is we all have learned patience the hard way. I have enough crap in my own life to deal with than to feel the need to lecture anyone else on parenting, teaching, etc. I just want the same from everyone else. "Please don't poke the bear!"

----- Original Message -----

From:

Sent: 6/4/2006 8:25:03 AM

Subject: Re: [ ] Radio, awareness of ASD

In a message dated 6/2/2006 12:18:08 PM Eastern Standard Time, rmaher1969@... writes:

<< I also have this uncharacteristic female personality that makes me stay on the point, this gets me in trouble with women frequently who want to bring emotion and other extraneous detail into a conversation which I view as black and white. This may be a function of my personality or a function of my profession. >>

>>>>>What? Why is everyone looking at me??!!

Not me. I am a lot like that too. I get in trouble a lot, especially online, because I don't do touchy feely very well. I am, though, totally lost on the conversation now. LOL. I thought someone just called up to complain about a noisy kid. I don't think it had anything to do with handicapped kids but we made it about handicapped kids since, well, that's what we do. lol. It's been a long week so I am not following the thread like a real person would/should.

I don't really mind kids too much unless they are really out of hand. In many cases, I can tell if they are doing so due to problems of autism since I've had two kids with HFA. Other times, the kid is just tired or a brat. And kids with autism have those moments too. I don't mind that as much either. Kids get tired. Kids think about themselves at all times. <g> They need to learn. So that's not such a big problem.

I think the bigger issue is the adult in charge. We are probably more sensitive, as a group, than the average person about disrupting life in the outside world. We deal with it more often. Some people just do not care if they are bothering others. That's just the way life is.

I think the most annoying thing of all to me in public is those adults who think we should all enjoy the show. You know the type - they talk loudly so everyone can hear them discuss the situation with their child. They pretend to beg for quiet or control of the situation but really, they are busy smiling at how cute their kid is and know that everyone around them thinks the kid is so cute too. I hate that!

Second place is the people who are just loud and yell at their kids like they are the only ones in the world. I mean, take the kid aside and discuss it quietly please! Not that I haven't yelled loudly in public on occasion but I hate people who make a habit of it. You know the type - by the end of your shopping trip, you know all the kids names by heart and how they will be punished. lol. And you want to punish the parent instead! lol.

Roxanna ô¿öAutism Happens