2006 Year In Review: My story and my thoughts on LPA from a Little Person

[Guest guest]

2006 was probably not the most memorable or remarkable years in my

life, in fact, it was probably one of the worst that I can remember

in a very long time. To start off with, I met a very charming and

wonderful AP man who knocked me off my feet. For the first time in

my life, I felt a whole and unconditional love from a man that I was

attracted to just the same. He was unashamed of me, and loved me in

all my dwarf-ways.

It was too good to be true, and indeed, it really was.

I later found out the man was married and was hiding a secret life

from his wife. After I got some *very* bright red flags, I decided

to do some research and I was able to contact her and find out the

truth. During a very interesting and heart-felt meeting with this

woman, I found out he had not only lied to me about his marital

status, but just about every other facet of his life as well, from

his job to his personal history, and it turned out he had been

bilking her for thousands of dollars during their very short and

abrupt marriage. Needless to say, this information turned my world

upside down.

I thought, after meeting him, my dating career with the `losers and

the user's' had come to an end. I would have never suspected such an

elaborate and skilled `player' to enter my life like he did. At

thirty years old, I couldn't understand how I could be so naïve

towards men as I was when I was 20. But obviously, after getting his

wife's account, I wasn't the only one duped by this man. On a more

interesting note, the fact that I had to tell her " Hey, and just to

let you know, I'm a dwarf " on the phone was a very difficult task in

itself.

I have been through counseling, and went as far as admitting myself

to an alcohol treatment center as after I found out the real deal on

this man, I started nearly drinking myself to death.

This situation made me think of other LP's and our vulnerabilities,

especially in the dating department. It made me wish there was an

outlet so that we would discuss this, as it seems, unlike what I

thought LPA's mission was, is to help each other.

But instead, it seems Little People want to hide, rather than

expose, the real demons and issues of more delicate and complicated

dynamics of being an anomaly in a otherwise `perfect' society, where

looks and appearance continue to be the first and foremost

qualifyer's of acceptance. And it's a shame that no attention is

being given to this matter.

LPA should be much more of a source of support than giving

information on how to acquire bottom-wipers, find local doctors and

give out information for new AP parents.

In the last year, I started to think that dwarfism was not just a

physical disability, but a mental one as well.

This year, I've seen three LP women have babies which is a medical-

mystery to many of us, and many hopeful child-bearing LP women like

me, remain left in the dark into the how's, the what if's, and the

why not's of having a baby. There is no comprehensive source of

information on this, and LPA's website just remains a bland and

precursory out-post of information that many of us already know, are

tired of hearing, and seems not really for our own benefit, but for

the general public.

True, LPA holds specialized work-shops at it's conventions that

cover the more delicate issues of dwarfism, but what about those who

can't afford, or those who don't want to attend the convention? And

while we're on that note, I think the prevailing philosophy in LPA

towards non-members that " You're either with us, or against us " is

immature and counter-productive and only further alienates

individuals who already face multitudes of discrimination everyday.

The image of dwarfs, though in baby-steps, has come a long way in

our society (even though it seems to continue to shoot itself in

it's own foot, sometimes), thanks to modern televised productions

like Roloff family reality-series, and more accurate portrayals of

dwarfs in film; I don't see why LPA can't follow suit.

I'm looking forward to the newer generations of LPA that will uphold

it's administration- and I'm hoping and expecting a hipper, more

cutting-edge and overall thought-provoking, compassionate version of

LPA in the future.

Thanks for listening!

" Cultural Learnings of Little People of America to Make Benefit for

Future Generations "