WebMD's Depression Test Has Only One (Sponsored) Answer: You're At Risk

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WebMD's Depression Test Has Only One (Sponsored) Answer: You're "At

Risk"

By Jim | Feb 22, 2010

Feeling depressed? Cheer yourself up by taking WebMD’s comical new

depression test. It’s sponsored by Eli Lilly (LLY) — maker of the

antidepressant Cymbalta – so they must know what they’re talking about,

right? In fact, no matter which of the 10 answers you choose on the

test, the result comes out the same:

You may be at risk for major depression.

Sen. Grassley wants the link between WebMD and Lilly

investigated because he suspects people may rely on the test, thinking

it is objective information when in fact it’s sponsored fluff.

To be fair to WebMD and Lilly, the test is clearly marked as “funded by

Lilly.” And there’s a Cymbalta ad sitting on the same page. But that

doesn’t excuse the fact that it is rigged. Even if you answer “no” to

all of the 10 questions (which are all framed so that the “yes” answer

indicates depressed behavior) you still get this response:

Lower Risk:

You may be at risk for major depression.

* If you have recurring thoughts of death or suicide, call your

doctor or any qualified health care provider right away. If you need

immediate assistance or think you may have a medical emergency, call

911.

You get this message even if you answer “no” to the question about

whether you think about death a lot. Here’s a screen grab of the result

for someone who clicks on none of the answers indicating depression:

If you click on more than five “yes” answers you get a similar message,

except that you’re diagnosed as “Higher Risk.”

And it’s not difficult for a non-depressed person to click at least

four answers that trigger the high-risk diagnosis. Here are four

questions that any ordinary person might answer yes to (with my

rationalization in parentheses):

I have trouble concentrating.

(In this mobile-web-digital culture, does anyone not have trouble

concentrating?)

My appetite has changed. I’m not eating enough, or I’m eating too

much.

(We’re in the midst of an obesity crisis and my culture’s role

models are all impossibly thin. Of course my appetite has changed.)

I feel tired almost every day.

(Right before bedtime, usually.)

I feel worthless or hopeless.

(I live in a country with historic levels of cultural narcissism

and unemployment. Forgive me if I occasionally despair!)

Grassley has asked WebMD to respond by March 4. Perhaps it can explain

why even a super happy person taking the test receives the “you may be

at risk” answer.