Re: Missed appointments

[Guest guest]

sounds like you need to find a dr that stays in the country more often. i

would keep calling until they are forced to fit you in today!! or ask for

another dr

[Guest guest]

Hi :

It is the way of the medical world to see associates of your doctor these

days. It happens to me and everybody else all the time. It is a pain but

they do have your chart and all medical info they need for a follow up visit.

It sounds like perhaps it is scar tissue on the side of your incision. I

have it from previous surgeries. Not to worry.

Regarding Mr. e-mailer; I too think you should scrap the jerk. He is getting

everything on his own terms and you are just going along with it. What are

you getting out of it? Crumbs? You need the whole cake and you deserve it;

frosting and all. This guy is probably playing games with more than just you

or he has a problem with intimacy if all he can do is talk via e-mail. He is

not worth the keys strokes you use to send him a response. I don't know

anything else about this guy and I don't like him already. Bowing out at a

crucial point in your life doesn't hold any plus points either. In sickness

and in health is how the marriage vow goes and he didn't even make it to the

alter. What's to happen if he did and things got worse regarding your

health? He cannot endure and you definitely need somebody who can endure.

Tell him to instant message me and I will tell him how real life really goes

on between two partners. He doesn't have a clue.

I hope you can have a very Merry X-mas and don't even give the jerk a

thought. He is just hurting you over and over and over again. I could keep

going on but for your sake I will stop. I picture a much brighter future for

you and believe me it will happen as long as you cut this guy off totally.

Lovingly, Jeannette

[Guest guest]

sorry karen, i guess i didn't read your whole post this morning. my phone was

ringing off the hook. i too have a man who doesn't want me but i guess afraid

to let me go. he keeps me hanging by e-mail too. even if we were to never

meet again we can always talk. was his latest thing. so thats how i keep my

head. we send mail several times a week. i know in my heart i think to myself

that if i hang in there maybe it'll work. but really i know my head knows

better. we have known each other almost 2 years. only the 2nd man i let in

my life in the past 8 years since my husband died. but i really like to talk

to him and miss him when i don't. i get frustrated sometimes. he said we will

hopefully get together soon. last year it was new years day. so i am hoping

for that. hang in there and whatever you choose to do. do it for you. i like

you ideas of pampering yourself. wish i could afford some luxuries!!! my boss

told me today my next check would be for one day, and i wouldn't be paid for

x-mas or new years holidays since i am on leave (which i still haven't been

approved for yet!!) to add to my list my son and his friend ran off the road

and hit a tree last night. fortunatly no one was hurt. then the lady at work

that tells me i need to have a positive attitude!!! i got a call today that i

am a major prze winner!!! the least i can win is $500 a 3 day trip to i don't

know where. or 50,000. they also said i could use the resort all day for me

and 3 guests so i agreed to go for the 90 driven tour thursday at 10:30 so

keep your fingers crossed and positive attitudes so they can pick the right

#'s!!! i could use some $$$$

[Guest guest]

:

has a much nicer way of saying things than I do. Your guy just reminded

me of XXX men I used to know. Then I met my husband and it is like night and

day. I am hoping that for you too if that is what you want.

Hope your day got better.

Jeannette

[Guest guest]

{{KAREN}}

Sorry you had such a bad day. Hope tomorrow is better. Happy Holidays.

Tery - FL

[Guest guest]

Of course we don't mind listening, . I'm sorry that you had such a

frustrating, maybe infuriating, experience with the doctor's office. That

hasn't happened to me yet, but I always worry that it will. I hang onto

those appointment cards they write and if they don't call me the day before,

I call them. You called this morning, so what more could you have done?

Nothing. Again, I'm so sorry.

I know the feeling, too, of not wanting to see one more doctor and go

through your whole story one more time. It's wearing. At least they could

get you in next week, even if it is with a different physician. It would be

much worse if you had to wait until January 18 or later.

If you want a man in your life, he has to be much stronger than Dave. I know

that he cares for you or is interested in you in some ways, but there are

things that are holding him back. I wish he would explain what his concerns

are to you. The fact that you still aren't sure what he is thinking is not a

good sign. Finally, he let you down when you needed him very much, so I know

you are better off without him.

I've got some holiday blues going, too. Nothing super horrible, but today

was the day my divorce was to be final, and there has been a delay until

February. So, bring on the glugg or the glogg! Sounds good to me.

Hope you enjoy being pampered a bit tomorrow morning, and that you have a

good trip and Christmas.

----- Original Message -----

From: <k.j.choate@...>

" RA-Support " < egroups>

Sent: Friday, December 22, 2000 12:07 PM

Subject: [ ] Missed appointments

> Hi, everyone-

>

> Even though the holidays are here, would you mind

> listening to complaining? I called my doctor's office -

> ob-gyn- to make sure I had my appointment time correct

> for this afternoon. This was to be my post-op

> hysterectomy check up - a week early- to get the go

> ahead to go back to work. I had some concerns about the

> incision - as I found a lump perpendicular to it. When I

> called they told me I had missed my appointment- that it

> had been scheduled at 8:45 this morning. I had it in my

> calendar for 2:50 p.m.. I KNOW that they had given me an

> afternoon appointment because I had wanted to leave for

> my sisters in St. Clair today but knew if it was 4 or

> after when I got out, my mom would not want to drive

> part of the way in the dark. I also had an invitation to

> the Bishop's Glugg party ( despite the name a nice

> event) and it was scheduled from 2 til 4 and I didn't

> RSVP because it would be cutting it so short. I wanted a

> morning appointment but they said none were available. I

> know I can make mistakes but as most of you know - with

> the way we move in the morning -an appointment as early

> as 8:45 would have registered. They must have rearranged

> his schedule and forgot to tell me.She told me they

> weren't taking afternoon appointments today. No big deal

> - why get upset huh? Just reschedule right? Wrong. Today

> is his last day in the office until January 18- he is

> going to Africa over the holidays for medical missionary

> work- hard to quarrel with - and I don't blame him

> but... then why doesn't his office call his patients

> with a reminder so this doesn't happen or call me at

> 8:45? I could have been there in 10 minutes- and I am

> sure they were that far behind. I've accommodated them.

> The hysterectomy itself was worked around two other

> trips he made to Viet Nam and Romania.

>

> Never fear I do have an appointment with another Dr. in

> the office next Friday at 9:20. Assuming we are not

> snowed in, I will make that . I am just discouraged that

> I will have to see a doctor who is a complete stranger -

> when I finally got used to this one. This has been a

> rough year medically and personally and I just don't

> feel like explaining it to one more doctor.

>

> I suppose it was compounded by the fact that I got

> online late last night and Dave instant messaged. Dave

> is the guy I broke up with right around the time I went

> to Mayo. He was wrapping presents late and checking e-

> mail. He was in a chatty but distant mood- I don't know

> why he bothers. We had a great first Christmas last

> year- he had wanted to get married - and guess what -

> have children. At 45 I am not sure that was realistic- I

> am not Connie Chung or Cheryl Tiegs. He seemed a little

> wary of the RA but was getting comfortable with it. When

> the big medical problems came up and he found out that I

> would have to have a hysterectomy or endometrial

> ablation- he pretty much split. He has two sons and an

> older from a former marriage. He once told me he would

> rather have me without babies than with them- he

> apparently changed his mind. I have not seen him since

> May but he e-mails regularly - says he's not sure if he

> wants to see me but enjoys talking to me. We have no

> plans to see one another over the holidays. My sister

> has told me to just cut him off- that he is a loser if

> he acted so poorly. Maybe that should be a New Years

> resolution.

>

> Oh well maybe I shouldn't have been in an office full of

> babies and pregnant women today anyway. The arthritis is

> flaring in my ankles and, as you can tell, I am feeling

> sorry for myself. I am usually a pretty positive person

> ...perhaps these holiday blues can be cured by getting

> out of town for a few days.. I scheduled a hair

> appointment tomorrow a.m.- that usually makes me feel

> better- then I will split to Sharon's with mom and the

> " boys " . Maybe I will " crash " the Bishop's party- just

> stay away from the Glugg table. ( " MeMom " - it would

> either be the cure or absolute bane of your stomach

> problems.) Sorry. I know this isn't the end of the

> world...noone is dying or anything. Thanks for

> listening. I needed to get it down on paper to put it in

> perspective.

>

> Hugs,

[Guest guest]

hey karen, don't worry thats what we are all here for. to help each other

through this whole thing. feel better and have a good holiday. personally i'm

gonna do my narcotics and try to sleep. i had to go to the store. i went thru

2 big boxes of kleenex. it is so cold i can hardly breathe out there, my son

thinks i may have pnuemonia. my nose is so raw!!! night everyone!!!

[Guest guest]

Thanks, .

Why did I know I could count on you to understand ?! The

problem was I didn't have one of those little

appointment cards... my discharge instructions told me

to call for a 5 week post op appointment...which I did

and I wrote it down. I was also told to make an

appointment to have staples removed the week I got out

of the hospital...with my Dr.. The appointment desk that

time scheduled me with a nurse practitioner instead. I

ended up seeing my doctor anyway after the nurse

removed the staples. She was alarmed by the amount of

bruising I had. It meant essentially doing situps twice

on two different narrow examining tables - imagine this

with a pretty fresh abdominal incision. Hines was upset

that they had not scheduled the appointment with him -

he explained that the bruising was due to the heparin I

was on and was supportive. I feel comfortable with him

and respect him. I know nothing about the guy I am

seeing next week. He will be the third ob-gyn I've seen

this year from that office- not including the two

residents Dr. Hines was teaching and who were around for

the surgery and pre- surgical consults (with the RA and

last January's pulmonary embolisms I guess I make

fascinating reading) and 2 family practice physicians I

saw for the same problems this year. They wanted to

schedule me with another nurse practitioner and I said

NO WAY. Sorry I know I'm whining, I respect nurse

practitioners but I know they will call in a doctor

anyway ...and I want to see a surgeon who knows what my

incision and healing should look like considering all

the factors involved. I feel like my privacy is really

being invaded.

As for Dave, I know what you and Jeannette and Kathy and

my sister and my mom and my other friends say is true. I

am having a hard time turning off my feelings. I really

care about him and got attached to his kids. I know he

does some stupid things that are against his self

interest ...like backing away from me... but I also know

I need someone stronger and less self absorbed. I can

say with as much certainty as any human can that if the

shoe were on the other foot I would have been there for

him. I guess I expected him to be so relieved and

grateful that I didn't die in January that he would

stick by me when it called for some big decisions like

the hysterectomy. When he wasn't I was crushed. I almost

married someone 8 years ago... and while I've dated

other people in the meanwhile, Dave is the first person

I've let get this close. I just hope I don't meet the

right person and find I can't let myself trust him... oh

well that is a pretty universal issue- not just

medically related. Yes, ... sometimes the

priesthood, forget the convent, sounds pretty good. And

I don't mean marrying a priest...God I have enough

problems!

Oh well enough. The rest of the day went well. When my

mom and I went out to dinner, I had a former student of

my sisters stop me. She had been at the Advent penance

service I did the reflection for about a week and a half

ago. She actually remembered what I had said and told me

how moved she was by the reflection. It made my day. I

am now looking forward to going to Sharon's and am

packing. I know Clancy will be good on the trip... he

rides very well. I hope Riley, the terrorist tabby, gets

along with Sharon's Himalayan " Gus " (aka Augustine's

Soul). It could be interesting.

Hope your holiday blues go away too. I am sure your

children will do their best to keep you laughing. The

Court's are really great in family cases.. delay after

delay. I've practiced in that area too long. People

don't understand the " Miracle at the Courthouse " - the

Supreme's stopping a recount and deciding an election in

less than a week. They should see what the delays are

like in the real world. If they are anything like the

sensitive people who set this stuff up in Michigan

....February means as close to Valentine's Day as

possible. I am glad you have a good sense of humor and

sense of irony. If you find either wearing thin please

feel free to rant and rave and whine to me...publicly or

privately.

Everyone here is great. There is such a great blend of

objective and subjective.I apologize for " bleeding " at

the mouth... and promise to do twice as much listening

from now on.

Hugs for the Holidays!

[Guest guest]

Gee, Kathy- your romantic life does sound like mine. I

don't know about you - but e-mail alone from someone is

not what I want in a relationship. I want the real thing

and that means going out and picking up a telephone -

someone to touch and hold and listen to a voice. I am

wary of the internet stuff - personally- when it doesn't

include a " real relationship " as well because I think it

can foster a false intimacy. Just my opinion. That's why

even with a group like this planning our " reunions " and

real meetings is healthy. As I said to - it is

really hard to let your guard down and let yourself

potentially be open to hurt... but I guess that is how

it plays out sometime.

I wish you could afford some luxuries too. Understand

that I don't do this everyday either and I don't have

the responsibility or gift of kids to raise or a huge

shopping list for the holidays. I have had to budget due

to this sick leave and unexpected vet bills. I wish I

could give you some direct advice about your disability

issues but I don't practice in your state and I haven't

seen all your documentation or know what you actually

have available to you at work. Your boss sounds like an

idiot and I would check with wage and hour to see if he

can play with your hours and compensation like

that...particularly since you aren't actually on leave.

The timing of the disability process does vary state to

state but the basic structure is the same - because at

least the Social Security part is a federal benefit. For

those of you frightened of courtrooms ... don't be. This

is an administrative law process in front of an

administrative law judge. While ALJ 's can be

intimidating the hearing is more informal - trained

paralegals are allowed to represent folks at these

hearings in MI. Your decision sounds like a sound one-

you are listening to your body which is avery good

thing. This does not mean you will never work again.

Social Security allows trial work windows to test your

ability to work if you improve. I have an attorney in my

office who had been on disability after a major

stroke... and that is what he is completing now. Good

luck to you and do check with your local legal aid

office too for help.

Finally, I really do NOT like the sound of this contest

you've won. I don't mean to burst your bubble but

PLEASE, Please, Please read everything carefully. There

are some really criminal unscrupulous people who just

look for people who need help and who are relying on

luck to help them. Please be careful. I have represented

a lot of people,Sr. Citizens in particular, who have

been vulnerable to consumer scams. Again check with a

local consumer group... Better Business Bureau, Chamber

of Commerce, before you do anything that sounds too good

to be true and lest I say it too many times a legal aid

office or local bar association. This sounds too slick.

Thank you for your concern for me, Kathy. Your plate is

pretty full to worry about me. I hope you have a

relaxing holiday with people you love...things will work

out if you take it slowly and surely. Big Hugs, .

[Guest guest]

Jeanette-

You are such a love! I really can imagine you instant

messaging Dave and telling him what life is about. It is

a most tempting offer. I have found over the years that

I am a much more effective advocate for others than

myself... but I am working on it. I think this is one

battle I will have to handle myself but don't think I

don't appreciate your offer. The only way I am going to

regain the self esteem I lost and a sense of trust is,

at the very least, to lay down some ground rules or more

likely to cut him off completely. For a variety of

reasons, I think his problem is intimacy. He is great

with his kids but I think thats because his emotional

maturity level is about the same as theirs... and that

may be doing an injustice to his kids.

On another note, I am really pleased that your dad's

liver enzymes have dropped and that he will be home for

the holidays. I agree with your brother about Mayo. I

worry that these guys don't know which end is up. How

bizarre about his teeth...haven't found them yet? I

thought you were going to say he swallowed them. I am

glad you raised hell. I hope you and Ed get a chance to

spend some quality time together with one another this

holiday. Yes, he most definitely sounds like a keeper!

You have a special place in my prayers, as does this

whole great group, right now. What do they say in the

Master Card Ad? You all are priceless.

Holiday Hugs,

[Guest guest]

Tery-

You too are such a sweetheart to be concerned. Everyone

has there aches and pains - personal and physical.Thanks

for listening and the encouragement.

[Guest guest]

karen i do want more from a relationship. i just don't feel right about

myself now. i think how can i bring someone into my life knowing what my body

is going through? it has been really changing lately. as far as the contest.

it's really just something to do. i know i can't buy anything. i am about -50

in the hole right now and unsure where my next dollar is coming i was told

yesterday that i must have a positive attitude to get thru this and 5 minutes

later i got that call. anything to put hope in my future at this point, i

guess! the way i feel right now, i won't make it to my family x-mas dinner

tomorrow. my dr called me in some antibiotics and cough meds w/codene. my

nose is so raw!!! also feeling guilty. my family was supposed to go to my

mom's in fl this year for x-mas. but i had no time from work, so my parents

drove up in this mess and i don't even think i will still see them. also a

very depressing time of year for me anyway. my husband died right after the

holidays. even before that, i would get the holiday blues. so if i sound all

mixed up i do have alot going on. not to mention this stupid fever. i know

i'm gonna get beyond this and feel better some day. i just needed to let some

of this out. just remember i might be delirious!!

[Guest guest]

Hi, my name is Colletti. I just read your last email and I thought I

would write to you. I am so sorry you are sick. That is really a bummer.

If you could get some vit C tabs 250 or 500mg take a couple every day and

that might help you get better faster. It usually helps me.

I am so sorry that you might miss your family gathering for Christmas. I

hope you feel better by then. I know how you feel about Christmas blues. I

get them too. Sorry about your husband. I never married. I wish I had. It

is something I have regretted that I didn't take advantage of when I had the

chance. I guess a lot of people get the Christmas blues. I never understood

about that till I lost my Mom and my Brother to cancer. Holidays are very

difficult now. We used to have a great time being together at the holidays.

My Mom and my Brother both loved the Christmas season. My brother loved to

suprise us all. He was a career man in the Navy, married, with one son.

They lived in Florida. They would suprise us many times and come to see us.

My brother liked to do that. He wouldn't tell us he was coming We would all

be so happy to see them when they came . I live in N.J. It was hard for me

to travel, but I had been to Florida several times. If I could only turn

back the time and we could have another family gathering, but that is not to

be anymore. So I have learned to deal with things the way they are now. I

thank God my Dad is still with me and pray he will be for a long time.

Together we make the best of things. However, I know things will never be

the same. I thank God for all the happy times we had. Before I got RA and

all the other bone problems etc. I had kidney failure and was on dialysis for

18 years. I now have a kidney transplant for 15 years. I am 53, so I have

been sick a long time. I have RA, OA, Osteoporosis, Sciatica, Spinal

Stenosis, Fibro, Asthma, Anemia, Stomach Problems, and High Blood Pressure.

I have the RA and the other things about 5 years.

I have a terrible problem with my back and can only walk about 3 mins and

then I have to sit down because my back goes into a spasm. I am in pain all

the time and on narcotics. I am hoping that a nerve block will give me some

relief and plan to have one in January. Well, I guess I am starting to

ramble. I wrote to you because I felt bad because it is Christmas time and

you are sick. I wanted to help you feel better. I hope I haven't depressed

you. I pray for you to get better soon and I hope you can make your family

gathering if you want to go. Anyway, have a Merry Christmas and a blessed

New Year.

Sincerely, Colletti

Anjillah#Aol.com

[Guest guest]

thanks angela, and i do take vitamin c and cod liver oil multi vitamin

glucosamine msm garlic who knows i take so much but it doesn't seem to help.

i know they said one of the side effects of enbrel is uri so i don't know if

that is why or what. alot of people i hear are sick with colds, flu,

bronchitis so who knows. sorry i was feeling sorry for myself and rambling

this morning. again i feel very lucky that i am as healthy and mobile as i

am. i know it is alot worse for alot of you.

[Guest guest]

Hi :

I hope you have a wonderful holiday too. So far, dad is NOT coming home

today. They are going one day at a time. He may or may not be home for

X-mas. If not, we will bring X-mas to his room. And no, they did not find

his teeth. The really funny part about it though is that dad said he needed

new dentures anyway because they were old and loose. I guess it was God

sent. The jokes on them!!!!

You just wait and see , a wonderful fella will come along when you least

expect it. That is how it happened to me at age 47. They catch you by

surprise. Then everything will be history. God bless and Merry Christmas.

Love, Jeannette

[Guest guest]

Kringlemom:

I can never remember what names go with e-mail addresses sorry. It would

help if you signed your messages.

Just wanted to send you some Holiday Cheer. Sounds like life looks pretty

grim for you right now. I guess we think we are suppose to be so up and

happy during the holidays which puts added pressure on people. It is ok to

feel the way you feel. I can understand how this time of the year can get to

you. It must remind you of your loss. I am sorry. I also feel bad that you

are so sick right now. I hope you can feel a bit better so you can at least

enjoy being with your family for a little while. Take care and blessings to

you.

Jeannette

[Guest guest]

:

Sorry you have the blues this X-mas too. You have alot of happy memories

though and maybe they can sustain you through the holidays.

I also hope you get some relief from your pain soon. It must be very

difficult to feel upbeat while experiencing so much pain and disability. My

very best to you and your dad. You are in my prayers .

God Bless,

Jeannette

[Guest guest]

thanks, i am trying to get better to spend it with my family. but i don't

think i will go. i don't wish this on anyone. i'll try to remember to sign

off. kathy

[Guest guest]

What you wrote to Kathy is so very touching, .

Despite the fact that you have so many complicated health problems, much

pain, and deep sadness at Christmas because you miss your mother and

brother, you found a way to reach out to her and try to help. And I'm sure

you did.

I enjoyed reading about your brother and how he loved to surprise you and

the family with a visit. Sounds almost like part of a warm movie. Do you

ever see his wife or son?

Although you lost your mother and brother to cancer, you do have wonderful

memories, and, in many important ways, they are still with you. I can tell

from the little you wrote about them how special they were and what a close

family you had. I'm glad you still have your father with you. I hope that

Christmas turns out to be a happy day for both of you.

I'm wish a healthier 2001 for you. I'm optimistic that the nerve block will

help. Please let us know what date you are going.

Peace,

----- Original Message -----

From: <ANJILLAH@...>

< egroups>

Sent: Saturday, December 23, 2000 7:47 AM

Subject: Re: [ ] Missed appointments

> Hi, my name is Colletti. I just read your last email and I thought

I

> would write to you. I am so sorry you are sick. That is really a bummer.

> If you could get some vit C tabs 250 or 500mg take a couple every day and

> that might help you get better faster. It usually helps me.

> I am so sorry that you might miss your family gathering for Christmas. I

> hope you feel better by then. I know how you feel about Christmas blues.

I

> get them too. Sorry about your husband. I never married. I wish I had.

It

> is something I have regretted that I didn't take advantage of when I had

the

> chance. I guess a lot of people get the Christmas blues. I never

understood

> about that till I lost my Mom and my Brother to cancer. Holidays are very

> difficult now. We used to have a great time being together at the

holidays.

> My Mom and my Brother both loved the Christmas season. My brother loved

to

> suprise us all. He was a career man in the Navy, married, with one son.

> They lived in Florida. They would suprise us many times and come to see

us.

> My brother liked to do that. He wouldn't tell us he was coming We would

all

> be so happy to see them when they came . I live in N.J. It was hard for

me

> to travel, but I had been to Florida several times. If I could only turn

> back the time and we could have another family gathering, but that is not

to

> be anymore. So I have learned to deal with things the way they are now.

I

> thank God my Dad is still with me and pray he will be for a long time.

> Together we make the best of things. However, I know things will never be

> the same. I thank God for all the happy times we had. Before I got RA and

> all the other bone problems etc. I had kidney failure and was on dialysis

for

> 18 years. I now have a kidney transplant for 15 years. I am 53, so I

have

> been sick a long time. I have RA, OA, Osteoporosis, Sciatica, Spinal

> Stenosis, Fibro, Asthma, Anemia, Stomach Problems, and High Blood

Pressure.

> I have the RA and the other things about 5 years.

> I have a terrible problem with my back and can only walk about 3 mins and

> then I have to sit down because my back goes into a spasm. I am in pain

all

> the time and on narcotics. I am hoping that a nerve block will give me

some

> relief and plan to have one in January. Well, I guess I am starting to

> ramble. I wrote to you because I felt bad because it is Christmas time

and

> you are sick. I wanted to help you feel better. I hope I haven't

depressed

> you. I pray for you to get better soon and I hope you can make your

family

> gathering if you want to go. Anyway, have a Merry Christmas and a blessed

> New Year.

> Sincerely, Colletti

> Anjillah#Aol.com

[Guest guest]

Dear Jeannette:

Thank you for your kind words. I hope your holidays bring you joy. I will

pray for your Dad and his recovery.

Sincerely,

[Guest guest]

Dear :

Thank you for your kind words. I really appreciate it. Yes I do see my

sis-in-law about once a year. We talk about every week and email or IM each

other practically daily. Since the loss of my Mom and my Brother, June and I

have grown very close. We regard each other like we are really sisters. It

has turned out to be a wonderful relationship and I am sure my Brother would

be happy about that. I speak to my nephew and his wife and the kids pretty

frequently. I haven't seen them in a few years. He is in the Navy and has a

lot to do. We live pretty far away from each other and money is difficult

for him to travel. We are planning on having a visit with them in the future

soon. I miss those kids so much. I get a lot of pictures and videos and

talk to them on the phone a lot.

I felt bad for Kathy. The thought of missing a family gathering really got

me. I hope she doesn't regret it in the future. Sometimes things happen and

later we wish we could change it or get that time back, but it is too late.

I haven't set a date for the nerve block yet. I must admit I am a little

nervous about doing it. Yet I know I don't have much of a choice. The way I

am now I can hardly walk very far without this terrible pain. I want to be

able to get more out of living and it holds me back so much. Sometimes I

feel like an old woman cause when I do my shopping I have to lean over on the

carriage for support or I can't walk. My back just gives out because of the

spasm and it effects my legs.

Even though I will make this the best Christmas possible.

I wish you much happiness at this special time and a Blessed New Year.

Sincerely,

Anjillah@...