A letter I wrote to NAMI Minnesota group...

[Guest guest]

[under the heading: " thank you " . With a couple changes]

I was diagnosed with OCD back in 91, when I was just starting High

School. Immediately after, I was put on clonipramine [spelling]. What

a miracle drug! I mean before taking medication I was a shy, high

achiever that use to excel in sports and was very popular amongst my

class mates. The prototypical " all American " , as Americans would say

(I'm Canadian). After getting on Clonipramine, I had no qualms

about talking with my fist or with weapons, could give a r*ts a*s

about my marks in school and lost all contact with my network of

friends. Not to suggest that I didn't have friends while on meds. I

had lots. It's just that none of them were actually what you would

describe as " good role models " -- you know, people that aren't in and

out of jail half their lives, who could care about school and had

goals, that didn't take street drugs, that didn't hang around gangs,

etc. You know those little things in life that we take for granted!

I developed a neurological disorder in my neck from taking meds as

well. That is, a verifiable disorder, unlike the unverifiable

disorders purported in the DSM. It's called Tortocollis. It's makes

you lose control of your neck muscles to the point that it becomes

difficult to do anything menial: walk, write messages on paper or on

the computer, lift groceries, clean the dishes. It's not curable

either; it's chronic. In other words, I will have it for the rest of

my live.

Also, thanks to the wonderful medications, I became so incapacitated

both mentally (was too stoned to think) and physically (my neck made

it difficult to walk) that doing school work became a non-starter. As

a result, I was forced to drop out of HS in my third year.

I've also tried killing myself at least 5 times while on meds.

So, the Clonipramine (prozac, all of the anti anxiety drugs, as I

tried them all – all with the same effect) was definitely a miracle

drug for me -- a miracle in the sense that I probably broke a

guiness world record in transforming my life from great into a living

h*ll!

But, here's the good news -- or perhaps, from the pharmaceutical

indrustries' point of view and their supporters, the bad news -- I

was able to get myself off meds, including the anti parkinsonian

medications (e.g., Artane) I was taking for my torcollis that was

turning me into a zombie. As a result, I was able to go back to

school. And I am now pursuing a university degree (which I hope will

lead to graduate work). Not without some difficulty, mind you,

because of the huge " deficit " in education that resulted from not

having completed most of my HS. But, I'm getting by.

And, of course my recent achievements would have been made possible A

LOT MORE SOONER if weren't for my being forced to take these mind-

altering

chemicals, that likely caused irreparable damage to my brain (aside

from the damage it caused to my neck), and

that definitely changed my life for the worse.

Although I am not bitter as you can tell.

Cube

[Guest guest]

[under the heading: " thank you " . With a couple changes]

I was diagnosed with OCD back in 91, when I was just starting High

School. Immediately after, I was put on clonipramine [spelling]. What

a miracle drug! I mean before taking medication I was a shy, high

achiever that use to excel in sports and was very popular amongst my

class mates. The prototypical " all American " , as Americans would say

(I'm Canadian). After getting on Clonipramine, I had no qualms

about talking with my fist or with weapons, could give a r*ts a*s

about my marks in school and lost all contact with my network of

friends. Not to suggest that I didn't have friends while on meds. I

had lots. It's just that none of them were actually what you would

describe as " good role models " -- you know, people that aren't in and

out of jail half their lives, who could care about school and had

goals, that didn't take street drugs, that didn't hang around gangs,

etc. You know those little things in life that we take for granted!

I developed a neurological disorder in my neck from taking meds as

well. That is, a verifiable disorder, unlike the unverifiable

disorders purported in the DSM. It's called Tortocollis. It's makes

you lose control of your neck muscles to the point that it becomes

difficult to do anything menial: walk, write messages on paper or on

the computer, lift groceries, clean the dishes. It's not curable

either; it's chronic. In other words, I will have it for the rest of

my live.

Also, thanks to the wonderful medications, I became so incapacitated

both mentally (was too stoned to think) and physically (my neck made

it difficult to walk) that doing school work became a non-starter. As

a result, I was forced to drop out of HS in my third year.

I've also tried killing myself at least 5 times while on meds.

So, the Clonipramine (prozac, all of the anti anxiety drugs, as I

tried them all – all with the same effect) was definitely a miracle

drug for me -- a miracle in the sense that I probably broke a

guiness world record in transforming my life from great into a living

h*ll!

But, here's the good news -- or perhaps, from the pharmaceutical

indrustries' point of view and their supporters, the bad news -- I

was able to get myself off meds, including the anti parkinsonian

medications (e.g., Artane) I was taking for my torcollis that was

turning me into a zombie. As a result, I was able to go back to

school. And I am now pursuing a university degree (which I hope will

lead to graduate work). Not without some difficulty, mind you,

because of the huge " deficit " in education that resulted from not

having completed most of my HS. But, I'm getting by.

And, of course my recent achievements would have been made possible A

LOT MORE SOONER if weren't for my being forced to take these mind-

altering

chemicals, that likely caused irreparable damage to my brain (aside

from the damage it caused to my neck), and

that definitely changed my life for the worse.

Although I am not bitter as you can tell.

Cube