Re: do you guys think of yourself as disabled?

[Guest guest]

Hi ! Oh I miss " Retail Therapy " too!!!! When I try, it's not

unusual for me to just sit right down in the middle of the aisle

because the pain gets too bad. Although I do consider myself

disabled...I think Physically Challanged sounds a lot nicer.

I understand your fear, because I have soo many " can't do's " and my

husband has to do just about everything around here. Which upsets me

too because he DESERVES a break! Each time I try to do something

that is out of my comfort zone I wind up hurting myself and then I

can't do the little bit I normally can...which isn't much as you

know. It's frustrating, it's scary, and I hate it! But, it is what

it is and just have to keep plugging along and try to focus on what

we can do and how much worse we could have it. Concentrate on the

positives, maybe write them down on an idex card to keep with you so

when you're having a bad day you can look at it and see that there

are bright spots too. When I'm feeling at my worst, I get down and

can't seem to remember that it isn't ALWAYS this bad, sometimes my

hubby has to remind me that I do have better days.

Love and Hugs!

Debbie

>

> I do and i dont. At times i can do things, other times i cant. But

I

> know I would NOT be able to hold down a REAL job. Because I never

know

> how I'll be from day to day. Technically tho I am classified as

> disabled. What bothers me the most is, i CANT do what I would like

to

> do. Pretty much go from day to day, but need help.Cant do any

yardwork,

> but then again, i would need a man to do what needs to be done

anyway.It

> upsets me and SCARES me at times. Cant travel at all, because i

couldnt

> leave the chiro for more than 4 days, or i'd be crawling on the

floor.

> I cant get around a store very well mostly cause of vertigo, that

the

> neck causes.MISS the SHOPPING!! cindy

>

[Guest guest]

Hi ! Oh I miss " Retail Therapy " too!!!! When I try, it's not

unusual for me to just sit right down in the middle of the aisle

because the pain gets too bad. Although I do consider myself

disabled...I think Physically Challanged sounds a lot nicer.

I understand your fear, because I have soo many " can't do's " and my

husband has to do just about everything around here. Which upsets me

too because he DESERVES a break! Each time I try to do something

that is out of my comfort zone I wind up hurting myself and then I

can't do the little bit I normally can...which isn't much as you

know. It's frustrating, it's scary, and I hate it! But, it is what

it is and just have to keep plugging along and try to focus on what

we can do and how much worse we could have it. Concentrate on the

positives, maybe write them down on an idex card to keep with you so

when you're having a bad day you can look at it and see that there

are bright spots too. When I'm feeling at my worst, I get down and

can't seem to remember that it isn't ALWAYS this bad, sometimes my

hubby has to remind me that I do have better days.

Love and Hugs!

Debbie

>

> I do and i dont. At times i can do things, other times i cant. But

I

> know I would NOT be able to hold down a REAL job. Because I never

know

> how I'll be from day to day. Technically tho I am classified as

> disabled. What bothers me the most is, i CANT do what I would like

to

> do. Pretty much go from day to day, but need help.Cant do any

yardwork,

> but then again, i would need a man to do what needs to be done

anyway.It

> upsets me and SCARES me at times. Cant travel at all, because i

couldnt

> leave the chiro for more than 4 days, or i'd be crawling on the

floor.

> I cant get around a store very well mostly cause of vertigo, that

the

> neck causes.MISS the SHOPPING!! cindy

>

[Guest guest]

Hello,

I don't post very often but do come in and read the messages nearly

everyday. I call myself broken (very broken). I go back to the

surgeon this week, after the last time when I went and apparently by

then I was supposed to be fixed and back to normal - HUH.

I am in the same amount of pain as before the surgery admitidly its

different but am now on neurontin for the pins and needles around my

side and down my leg plus if I don't take them I " m gimpy and hobble

around. If I don't take the muscle relaxers by 10am am pooped for

the day and have to take pain pills as well. I now take more pills in

a day than I probably did in 6 months. I now have throbbing in my

lower spine to go with the normal pain so I don'T suppose thats good.

They now want to do another MRI to see if its scar tissue, another

fragment, or plan C that they did not leave me with enough disk. To

me its daft to have another surgery for something caused by the 1st

surgery and if they go in to remove scar tissue will just land up

with more. Was trying to work 3 days a week but now do 1 and then

half and then 1 as I sit a lot of the time and by the end of the day

when it hurts more can feel myself getting more bad tempered as the

day goes on. Its so nice to have pain all the time.

Sorry this is long winded but have to vent. I miss not being able to

do things like weed eating and I hate asking for help. My kids now do

the garden stuff for me and help me out a lot but I should be able to

do things myself. My son does a half effert at the weed eating and it

drives me crazy, I would love to pick the thing up and sling it

around like I used to and do the job properly.

I have to try and work as we had no insurance (dumb) so am now paying

everyone for that. I breed persians and was supposed to go to Waco

with my friend but she had to back out as she had famliy coming. I

could not go as would not have been able to drive for 6 hours as it

was, was dreading sitting in a car for 6 hours that annoys me as

can't do things I enjoyed anymore. Also the cats seem like a chore

now which is sad as I really enjoy them. Suppose some of this is

depression which is why some days is hard to get off the couch and

make myself do stuff.

Anyway thanks for letting me ramble as don't really have anyone that

would understand, I never understood what people with back problems

went thru. My husband is very good but am sure he gets sick of

hearing it.

Dave I read your posts and know how you feel

[Guest guest]

At 06:12 PM 8/1/2008, you wrote:

>Hello,

>

>I don't post very often but do come in and read the messages nearly

>everyday. I call myself broken (very broken). I go back to the

>surgeon this week, after the last time when I went and apparently by

>then I was supposed to be fixed and back to normal - HUH.

That's fine that you read, and great that you decided to post. If

all you do is vent, then we served our purpose, and we can assure you

that you are not alone in the way you feel.

> I now take more pills in

>a day than I probably did in 6 months.

I never even used to take aspirin for headaches. I was very

anti-pill. The most I took was Pepto-Bismo. Now I take about 14

pills a day, 24 x 7. Every day I count them out. I have a whole

dresser drawer dedicated to them. Then I got to keep on top of

re-ordering them God forbid I would ever run out. If you are tight

with money, please check into PHARMA who can offer free or reduced

pills. Has anyone on this list been accepted into their program?

> I now have throbbing in my

>lower spine to go with the normal pain so I don'T suppose thats good.

There are times my Spine feels like it is going to push out through

my skin. I hate that feeling. Again for me when that happens Ice

and cushions help.

>They now want to do another MRI to see if its scar tissue, another

>fragment, or plan C that they did not leave me with enough disk. To

>me its daft to have another surgery for something caused by the 1st

>surgery and if they go in to remove scar tissue will just land up

>with more.

Get a second opinion. Only you know what to do, but if it is scar

tissue, maybe minimally invasive surgery can relieve some pain.

>Was trying to work 3 days a week but now do 1 and then

>half and then 1 as I sit a lot of the time and by the end of the day

>when it hurts more can feel myself getting more bad tempered as the

>day goes on. Its so nice to have pain all the time.

Sitting is often hard. I tried to work until the bitter end. Thank

God my employer knew my condition and allowed me to work as much or

as little as I could. Luckily He needed me more than I needed

him. I know that is a rare case.

>Sorry this is long winded but have to vent.

Again, don't be sorry. Vent like a volcano if you must. We all need

to talk to someone other than our little circle who is tired of

hearing us, no matter how much they love us.

> I miss not being able to

>do things like weed eating and I hate asking for help. My kids now do

>the garden stuff for me and help me out a lot but I should be able to

>do things myself. My son does a half effert at the weed eating and it

>drives me crazy, I would love to pick the thing up and sling it

>around like I used to and do the job properly.

We don't choose to be disabled. I'd be a much happier camper working

or being self employed again. Just the other day I was sooooo

depressed because I need to find a purpose to get up and live. I

always found lawn mowing relaxing. It's mindless and in the end you

see that you made real progress.

>I have to try and work as we had no insurance (dumb) so am now paying

>everyone for that.

You should consider applying for SSDI. If you have worked on the

books most of your life and you have the medical reason, which it

seems you do, you qualify.

>I breed persians and was supposed to go to Waco

>with my friend but she had to back out as she had famliy coming. I

>could not go as would not have been able to drive for 6 hours as it

>was, was dreading sitting in a car for 6 hours that annoys me as

>can't do things I enjoyed anymore.

6 hours in a car would kill me. I think I would need to have the

seat all the way back or lay down in a van or station wagon. 3 is

the absolute max and then I'm shot for the next 24 hours.

>Also the cats seem like a chore

>now which is sad as I really enjoy them.

My Mother-in-law has a tabby who has adopted me. He really keeps my

spirits up. We also have a Rabbit. I feel guilty because I don't

give him the attention he needs because it involves bending and

sometimes chasing after him. We used to have 17 house bunnies, so I

know how you feel. We also have a pond with large goldfish. I can

no longer keep it up because it requires heavy lifting and going down

in the pond up to waist deep. The summer is 2/3 over and I haven't

really tended to it. I know it upsets my Mother-in-law because she

loves it, and when we put it in I promised to tend to it. I used to

love to do it, but I just can't anymore.

> Suppose some of this is

>depression which is why some days is hard to get off the couch and

>make myself do stuff.

Of course the depression has a lot to do with it, are you on anything

for it. Have you been able to see a therapist. We used to see one

through church for only $5 a visit. She normally charged $65-75 but

the church paid the rest for us. She was a God Send.

>Anyway thanks for letting me ramble as don't really have anyone that

>would understand, I never understood what people with back problems

>went thru. My husband is very good but am sure he gets sick of

>hearing it.

>

>Dave I read your posts and know how you feel

Thank you, now I know how you feel, and so do the other good folks

here. Thanks for posting May I ask the un-askable question how old

are you? It hurts at any age, but it really strikes home when your in

the prime of your life. I'm now 47, but this all started this round

at 39, but my first back surgery was at 22-23. BTW my first wife's

name was Sue. Blessings to you, and all on this forum. Dave

[Guest guest]

,

I do and don't from day to day also, but when I really look at it, I

am. I like you can't work, and for the most part can't even do

things I WANT to do, so I guess we fit the definition. Though

compared to someone in a wheelchair or other much worse conditions, I

don't feel disabled. Unless I'm having a real bad day, I don't use

the handicap parking places even though I have a placard. I save

those for someone more in need of it. It do use them if I need to go

grocery shopping. I also have problems with vertigo when I'm out too

long. I carry dramamine and Excedrine Migraine capsules which most of

the time help with that. I read where vertigo can be caused by what

is called a dry migraine. It's a migraine without the headache but

with vertigo and nausea. One other thing about shopping, the hard

often concrete of tile floors of stores are hell on my back. 15

minutes and I'm done. I really felt disabled when my disability was

approved. It was like one chapter of my life was closed and working

life was no more. I went into a deep depression right after that,

instead of the joyful dance I expected to have. I think for me there

is a gray area. I can't do what I want most of the time, but there

are many much worse of than me, so I need to make the best of what

I've been dealt. Good thread. Dave

[Guest guest]

Hi Dave,

I am 41. I suppose one of the hardest things is to accept that I can't

do the things I want to do or used to do. Pain does not do nice things

to you, I hear myself sometimes and go ouch as I know I am short with

my kids and its not their fault. I also do think of the people that are

much worse off than I am and am grateful I'm not worse than I am. I

never ever thought anything like this would happen to me but I suppose

that everyone thinks that.

ps my hubby has always called me Sue

[Guest guest]

yes Im disabled Im in a wheelchair and a walker as of July 9th and am going for

SSDI and it is in the works as we speak. If I wasnt disabled Id be working a

full time job. The unemployment rate is 5.7% thats the highest that it has ever

been. Wanda

From: caesareacattery <caesareacattery@...>

Subject: Re: do you guys think of yourself as disabled?

neck pain

Date: Saturday, August 2, 2008, 8:04 AM

Hi Dave,

I am 41. I suppose one of the hardest things is to accept that I can't

do the things I want to do or used to do. Pain does not do nice things

to you, I hear myself sometimes and go ouch as I know I am short with

my kids and its not their fault. I also do think of the people that are

much worse off than I am and am grateful I'm not worse than I am. I

never ever thought anything like this would happen to me but I suppose

that everyone thinks that.

ps my hubby has always called me Sue

[Guest guest]

Great, thought provoking question. I am definitely not disabled but

the term physically challenged definitely applies. When it comes to

doing anything physical, I really have to stop and think about it and

whether or not I can set aside time to recover should something go

wrong and/or access my therapist. Because of this, I don't get enough

exercise and that's making me worse. Car trips are truly

uncomfortable. I'm also experiencing menopausal symptoms so the car

trip we took with the kids this summer is now my new definition of

hell. Poor things, they probably thought I'd been possessed by a demon.

[Guest guest]

Hello,

Can't you feel your horns growing sometimes. Last fall I planted my

mums in the garden (pre broken days !!) and they have grown like crazy

so I had 3 I wanted to dead head as they have hundreds of little

flowers, so sad I had to think twice about doing that. How can it

possibly hurt to do something so simple, by the second one the back was

in spasms and was using one arm to prop myself up to the house and the

other to get the dead flowers. Got it done but now am not so sure it

was worth it. I want the days back that I just did stuff and did not

have to think about it.

[Guest guest]

Hello,

Can't you feel your horns growing sometimes. Last fall I planted my

mums in the garden (pre broken days !!) and they have grown like crazy

so I had 3 I wanted to dead head as they have hundreds of little

flowers, so sad I had to think twice about doing that. How can it

possibly hurt to do something so simple, by the second one the back was

in spasms and was using one arm to prop myself up to the house and the

other to get the dead flowers. Got it done but now am not so sure it

was worth it. I want the days back that I just did stuff and did not

have to think about it.

[Guest guest]

Hello,

Can't you feel your horns growing sometimes. Last fall I planted my

mums in the garden (pre broken days !!) and they have grown like crazy

so I had 3 I wanted to dead head as they have hundreds of little

flowers, so sad I had to think twice about doing that. How can it

possibly hurt to do something so simple, by the second one the back was

in spasms and was using one arm to prop myself up to the house and the

other to get the dead flowers. Got it done but now am not so sure it

was worth it. I want the days back that I just did stuff and did not

have to think about it.

[Guest guest]

Hello,

Can't you feel your horns growing sometimes. Last fall I planted my

mums in the garden (pre broken days !!) and they have grown like crazy

so I had 3 I wanted to dead head as they have hundreds of little

flowers, so sad I had to think twice about doing that. How can it

possibly hurt to do something so simple, by the second one the back was

in spasms and was using one arm to prop myself up to the house and the

other to get the dead flowers. Got it done but now am not so sure it

was worth it. I want the days back that I just did stuff and did not

have to think about it.