Update on Nick

[Guest guest]

Do you have them filling out an ABC chart on Nick? I would insist on it.

Have them fill it out and send it home and you can chart it.

You need to have all of the details of what was happening BEFORE the

behavior and what happened AFTER the behavior.

WHY is he acting out? WHAT was he reacting to or what was his payoff.

Don't worry about the behavior.. Well, worry about it,,, but until you know

why he is doing it and can rectify that, you aren't going to get anywhere.

The behavior isn't the problem.

Does he have a reward system? A positive program? No negatives.

Ok, now this is something that would throw Mav off.. The change in schedule.

The party..the whole day was probably different than his normal routine.

Maverick would not do well with that when he was younger. Even now, we talk

about what is going to be different to warn him, and get his mind thinking

differently. When he was younger, a substitute aide or teacher was cause

for anxiety for him. For that reason they needed to let me know if the

teacher wasn't going to be there so I could talk to him about it before hand

Just some suggestions.

" Attitudes are Contageous. Is YOURS worth catching? "

[Guest guest]

I am with as to knowing what has happened BEFORE and AFTER - you need

to know what he is actually trying to say with this behaviour, and how best

to avoid it happening again. Trent over the years has done some things,

that when I have analysed the big picture the behaviour hasn't really been

the problem the problem having been something entirely different.

An example that has come to mind, he once disappeared from school (one of

many times) this time heading to the nearby shopping centre. My analogy of

this was - he had $2.00 which had been in his chat book to pay for an

excursion, which the teacher had not taken out (and a system we had been

using all year) - he had shown a few people who just ignored the fact it

was there. After a few days, it got the better of him and he decided to go

to the shop. To me fair enough - although not what we want him to do, but

if the teacher had done his job in the first place the situation would never

have arisen.

Our kids get pulled into line and punished for a lot of things that if those

responsible where doing their job properly would never occur.

Keep smiling

Jan, mother of Trent 21yo with DS from the LandDownUnder

32 more sleeps until we are off to the Northern Hemisphere and a bit of cold

weather for a change.

Re: Update on Nick

Do you have them filling out an ABC chart on Nick? I would insist on it.

Have them fill it out and send it home and you can chart it.

You need to have all of the details of what was happening BEFORE the

behavior and what happened AFTER the behavior.

WHY is he acting out? WHAT was he reacting to or what was his payoff.

Don't worry about the behavior.. Well, worry about it,,, but until you know

why he is doing it and can rectify that, you aren't going to get anywhere.

The behavior isn't the problem.

Does he have a reward system? A positive program? No negatives.

Ok, now this is something that would throw Mav off.. The change in schedule.

The party..the whole day was probably different than his normal routine.

Maverick would not do well with that when he was younger. Even now, we talk

about what is going to be different to warn him, and get his mind thinking

differently. When he was younger, a substitute aide or teacher was cause

for anxiety for him. For that reason they needed to let me know if the

teacher wasn't going to be there so I could talk to him about it before hand

Just some suggestions.

" Attitudes are Contageous. Is YOURS worth catching? "

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 2/14/2006 8:12:09 P.M. Eastern Standard Time,

janmarie21@... writes:

After a few days, it got the better of him and he decided to go

to the shop. To me fair enough - although not what we want him to do, but

if the teacher had done his job in the first place the situation would never

have arisen.

Okay, here's a question, how do I deal with the attitude of " Nick knows

better " or " Nick can't always have his way and has to learn to follow the

rules. "

(DH is a bad one for stating these, but I see that attitude in others even

when they don't say it.) Now, I can step back and at times say, " maybe the

problem is really Nick is trying to do " x. " Yes, I know he can't always do

what he wants or that he knows better, but perhaps he figures that it's

alright. Similar to your example with Trent. Yes, Trent probably 'knew' the

money

was for " x " but since no one took it for that, even with reminders.

Therefore, he decided that the money must really be his to do whatever he

wanted with

even though he 'knew' why you originally gave him the money.

DH sees this as me making excuses or justifications based on my reasoning

versus giving Nick an opportunity to tell us why in his own words. (Oh, BTW,

if you ask Nick why he did something you usually get 'I don't know.')

Cari

[Guest guest]

Nick is doing well, the increase on remicade sure has helped. This

last week before infusion ( treatment last friday) he was pretty

tired, lots of activity and baseball season started, which he was

determined to try again this year ( it's been 3 years) We got copies

of his labs and a lot of them are off including his RBC, Hgb and

hematocrit which are all low. His WBC was also lower than I have seen

it, but still within normal. My question, is Nick gettgin amemic

because of the increase in remicade dosing or has all the activity

last week worn him out??

Nick was such a hoot at the hospital, we had a male nurse who Nick

kept refering to as doctor. The nurse kept correcting him, but Nick

just laughed and said, you cant be a nurse, you're not a girl!!!!

They settled on calling him a medic!!!.

Well the medic found a great vien, stuck the IV in and said it was a

great one and what a great kid Nick was, but when he tried to draw

blood, it didnt work. He dug that thing around and around, Nick just

sat there and smiled. The medic told Nick how sorry he was and how

the vien must have rolled, to which Nick replied, no it didnt, you

poked too deep and it went right though and out the other side!!! Too

funny!!! Nick then told him, i thought you were a great medic but now

you are only an ok one!!! So we had to switch arms and try again,

which worked, thank goodness.

Funny, Nick can take as many IV starts that they throw at him,they

don't phase him at all but hes getting more and more upset about his

MTX shot each week. I don't get it. he actually tells me he feels

sick to his stomach just thinking about it?? Any ideas??

have a great week everyone!!

hugs Helen and (9,systemic)