Christmas Without Her.......

[Guest guest]

Yes it is Christmas. I look around and realize it has almost been a year.

Stockings are being hung, Lights are going up. But I realize something is so

different here this year. Kaltyn is not with us. Im so gratefull she is not

hurting anymore and has gone on to be with Jesus. I can't imagine what her first

Chritmas will be like in heaven. But I do no that my first Christmas here

without her is killing me Will I make it through it. I know I will but on my it

is hard. She was my strongest weekness. I still can't belive she left so

soon. How he slowly held her in the palm of his hand as he carried her home. IF

I

could have one thing this Christmas it would be to hear her voice one more

time. If I had only known it was my last nite with her January 26, The things

I can sit here and think of now that I would have done. I look and see the

lives she touched and how gratefull I am. The one and only reason Im still in

the field of Hyperbarics is because of her. I do belive that is her legacy and

that is why I fight so hard to get a clinic opened in Texas one day. I will

call it Katy's Place. I once thought I didn't want to do this. But I was

wrong. I will spend the rest of my life trying to accomplish this now. I just

wish I could close my eyes for a minute and see her in heaven Christmas day or

any day just to no everything is ok. Many tell me. You have to go on. I do no

that and Im doing ok. Many say you no where she is at and God is taking care

of her why are you so sad at times.

I can only tell them this. Yes I do no. Yes I do no she is not hurting she

is running on the hilltops. But IM human and the carnal being inside of me can

only say no matter what anyone tells you the loss of a child takes 20 years

off your life. You will never be able to explain the loss unless you have been

through it. Each loss is different. Kaltyn and my wife were and still are my

life. They complete me. I used to say without the two of them I would not be

able to breath one was my lungs the other my heart, The day Kaltyn passed

Janie stepped in and became the life support to keep me alive,

But I wonder am I putiing to much on her at times she is so strong. She is

my strength when im week my voice when I can no longer speak. If you have ever

heard the song because you loved me that is my wife to me.

It seems so hard to end this email. How do I. But I no you guy's are busy.

So I will end for now. Say a prayer for me. I will for you.

Darin

Kaltyn Daddy loves you. I will never forget you. IM still captured by your

memories.

Father of My angel in heaven Katlyn 11-13-92 to 01-26-04

[Guest guest]

Dear Darin,

I will not pretend to understand what you are going through. I know I love

my children more than life itself. Just the thought of losing one is over

whelming. I wish I knew some magic words to make everything better. I am

so sorry for your lost. If there is anything I can do please let me know.

Love to all,

Rose Manning

[ ] Christmas Without Her.......

>

> Yes it is Christmas. I look around and realize it has almost been a year.

> Stockings are being hung, Lights are going up. But I realize something is

so

> different here this year. Kaltyn is not with us. Im so gratefull she is

not

> hurting anymore and has gone on to be with Jesus. I can't imagine what her

first

> Chritmas will be like in heaven. But I do no that my first Christmas here

> without her is killing me Will I make it through it. I know I will but on

my it

> is hard. She was my strongest weekness. I still can't belive she left so

> soon. How he slowly held her in the palm of his hand as he carried her

home. IF I

> could have one thing this Christmas it would be to hear her voice one

more

> time. If I had only known it was my last nite with her January 26, The

things

> I can sit here and think of now that I would have done. I look and see

the

> lives she touched and how gratefull I am. The one and only reason Im

still in

> the field of Hyperbarics is because of her. I do belive that is her

legacy and

> that is why I fight so hard to get a clinic opened in Texas one day. I

will

> call it Katy's Place. I once thought I didn't want to do this. But I was

> wrong. I will spend the rest of my life trying to accomplish this now. I

just

> wish I could close my eyes for a minute and see her in heaven Christmas

day or

> any day just to no everything is ok. Many tell me. You have to go on. I

do no

> that and Im doing ok. Many say you no where she is at and God is taking

care

> of her why are you so sad at times.

>

> I can only tell them this. Yes I do no. Yes I do no she is not hurting she

> is running on the hilltops. But IM human and the carnal being inside of me

can

> only say no matter what anyone tells you the loss of a child takes 20

years

> off your life. You will never be able to explain the loss unless you have

been

> through it. Each loss is different. Kaltyn and my wife were and still are

my

> life. They complete me. I used to say without the two of them I would not

be

> able to breath one was my lungs the other my heart, The day Kaltyn passed

> Janie stepped in and became the life support to keep me alive,

>

> But I wonder am I putiing to much on her at times she is so strong. She is

> my strength when im week my voice when I can no longer speak. If you have

ever

> heard the song because you loved me that is my wife to me.

>

> It seems so hard to end this email. How do I. But I no you guy's are busy.

> So I will end for now. Say a prayer for me. I will for you.

>

>

> Darin

>

>

>

> Kaltyn Daddy loves you. I will never forget you. IM still captured by your

> memories.

> Father of My angel in heaven Katlyn 11-13-92 to 01-26-04

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Darin,

Sending you my love and hugs..I could not help but cry, but it helps

me to do that every once in a while. I remember almost losing Giovani

and saying goodbye to him and that was hard..I can't stand to think

of the day I may lose him. I am so glad that you can express how you

feel because that truly helps us too..

Hugs