Re: feeling sorry for myself...

[Guest guest]

-

Don't be so upset! Like your husband said, who cares! People judge,

that's just the nature of them..and they stare too. While they do

stare at your little angel, you are assuming negative things, however,

they could very well be staring out of curiousity. Actually, that is

most likely the reason why they stare. That is what I have found with

my son. And there's no harm in that. Also, people probably still

think he is cute, but maybe they're just more hesitant to approach you

and say so for a number of reasons: 1. They might think something

serious is wrong with your son and they don't want to uncomfortably

approach and ask questions 2. They may assume that you get people

approaching you all day so they are trying to give you some peace and

quiet. 3. Maybe they know about the helmet already ( maybe one of

their own children had it or someone they know) and they are just

intrigued that they see another child with one. So just relax. Your

son will have the helmet off before you know it and he will have his

own " perfect little head " . If you haven't already, decorate his

helmet so it will give them something else to enjoy when they are

checking out Gabe, besides his adorable face!

, mom to Tyson

Chicago, IL

>

> We went to the mall today and everyone was staring at Gabe. It made

> me sad. My husband says Gabe doesn't care so who cares. Usually I

am

> not bothered (it's only been a week). But at the mall there were so

> many people and I saw all these babies with perfect little heads and

> it makes me sad. Everyone used to say " what a cute baby " and now the

> just stare. I know it is vanity, and I shouldn't let it bother me but

> it still makes me sad.

> I missed out on my pregnancy b/c I was on bedrest and in the hospital

> for three months and now I feel like part of his first year is being

> taken away.

> Just feeling sorry for myself today...

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi -

I felt the same way when Jakob started wearing his STARband. I was in

a mall and there were stares, but one lady came up to me and said her

grandson had to wear a helemt also and we started talking about it. I

find if people are curious they ask why he has to wear it, I tell them

, then they are fine with it. I hope you feel better...it does get

easier. Now when we are out in public everyone says how cute his

STARband looks.

Jakob - 7 months - brachy

STARband 7/25/06

>

> We went to the mall today and everyone was staring at Gabe. It made

> me sad. My husband says Gabe doesn't care so who cares. Usually I am

> not bothered (it's only been a week). But at the mall there were so

> many people and I saw all these babies with perfect little heads and

> it makes me sad. Everyone used to say " what a cute baby " and now the

> just stare. I know it is vanity, and I shouldn't let it bother me but

> it still makes me sad.

> I missed out on my pregnancy b/c I was on bedrest and in the hospital

> for three months and now I feel like part of his first year is being

> taken away.

> Just feeling sorry for myself today...

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

-

Hi ,

I know how you are feeling, people can't wait to run over to your cart

to see the little bundle of joy. When they see the helmet they look at

you real pathetic like. But you know what my dd Jenna and your ds Gabe

are absoutley BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!! along with all the other babies here

with helmets. Don't feel so down on yourself you are doing what needs

to be done with Gabe now and he will only be in the helmet for such a

short time and the rest of his life he will have a beautiful round head

to kiss.

Hold your head up high look at those people and smile and say " Isn't he

the most beautiful baby that you have ever seen. " It's hard and people

are ignornate because they don't know. Jenna is my 3rd child and I

didn't know anything about plagio or tort before her. There needs to

be more info about this out there so people are better informed.

I cried when I read your post because I feel the same way and I know

others are feeling the same way. But we have to remember that we are

doing this for our children and they wont even remember this all we

will have is pictures to look at and a beautiful round head.

I hope the words of encouragement helped and with the Christmas season

just around the corner we can not be locked away in our houses. We

need to get out there and hold our head up high because we know what we

are doing is in the best interest of our child and thats the important

part.

Best of luck, and remember God will take care of things, he always does.

Tina Mama to Jenna 7 mos Starband 9/8/06 - ?

-- In Plagiocephaly , " laurakt76 " <lktakagi@...> wrote:

>

> We went to the mall today and everyone was staring at Gabe. It made

> me sad. My husband says Gabe doesn't care so who cares. Usually I am

> not bothered (it's only been a week). But at the mall there were so

> many people and I saw all these babies with perfect little heads and

> it makes me sad. Everyone used to say " what a cute baby " and now the

> just stare. I know it is vanity, and I shouldn't let it bother me but

> it still makes me sad.

> I missed out on my pregnancy b/c I was on bedrest and in the hospital

> for three months and now I feel like part of his first year is being

> taken away.

> Just feeling sorry for myself today...

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

I think we all have days like that... Usually people just wave and

say 'hi ' (since we have his name on his helmet) and I'm able to

ignore the stares, but sometimes I just wish I had a really good

comeback for people who look at him like he's from another planet...

What gets me the most is the worry that he'll never have a 'normal'

head. If I knew for sure he'll end up 'normal' (and not

necessarily 'perfect') it would be an easier journey.

One thing that helps me out is knowing that the helmet is only

temporary. He doesn't appear to have any other learning disabilities

or things that will slow him down later in life. He's also got a small

heart defect and hypospadis which will need surgery to correct and they

doing testing to see if he has any genetic syndromes, so right now, the

helmet is fortunately one of the least of my worries. I belong to

another board of one of the syndromes they think he might have and when

I read everything all those other babies are going through (like having

to feed their babies through a tube) it makes the helmet seem like

nothing. I think that helps keep it in perspective for me.

Good luck! We're all here for you.

Sheila, mom to , 13 months, STARband 3/6-8/6, DOCband 9/6-?

P.S. If anyone has any great comebacks for the stares, I'd love to hear

them!

>

> We went to the mall today and everyone was staring at Gabe. It made

> me sad. My husband says Gabe doesn't care so who cares. Usually I am

> not bothered (it's only been a week). But at the mall there were so

> many people and I saw all these babies with perfect little heads and

> it makes me sad. Everyone used to say " what a cute baby " and now the

> just stare. I know it is vanity, and I shouldn't let it bother me but

> it still makes me sad.

> I missed out on my pregnancy b/c I was on bedrest and in the hospital

> for three months and now I feel like part of his first year is being

> taken away.

> Just feeling sorry for myself today...

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

,

I know that it can be extremely hard. It's kind of funny, I thought

that I would be completely self conscious about taking him out in

the

helmet and even worried about the way I would feel about seeing him

in it, but I

spend so much time on plagio websites and message boards looking at

pictures of the babies in their helmets that he actually

looked " normal " to me in it since I've seen so many.

The stickers seem to help a lot with strangers having something

positive to say and take away some of the awkwardness. It IS hard

to

deal with it when they don't ask and just look. The biggest thing

that I've had to deal with is all the questions from people who I do

know and they act like it is all for vanity. I've been really

focusing on the possible physcial difficulties that can go along

with

it if left untreated.

Just today I realized after talking to many, many people at church

this morning that most people think that he's injured or has had

surgery or something like that. I guess it explains the stares and

odd looks a little bit. I try to step back a little bit and think

about what I would feel seeing a baby in a helmet if I didn't know

anything at all about plagio (like a lot of people) and I guess I

would feel concerned and curious.

What did you mean that he seems uncomfortable? What kind of helmet

does he have?

Anyway, I just wanted you to know that you're not alone.

>

> We went to the mall today and everyone was staring at Gabe. It

made

> me sad. My husband says Gabe doesn't care so who cares. Usually

I

am

> not bothered (it's only been a week). But at the mall there were

so

> many people and I saw all these babies with perfect little heads

and

> it makes me sad. Everyone used to say " what a cute baby " and now

the

> just stare. I know it is vanity, and I shouldn't let it bother me

but

> it still makes me sad.

> I missed out on my pregnancy b/c I was on bedrest and in the

hospital

> for three months and now I feel like part of his first year is

being

> taken away.

> Just feeling sorry for myself today...

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

I forgot to mention... I found this web site a while back (I think

from another post) that carries some really cute plagio bibs and t-

shirts. I ordered my son one that says 'Don't mind me... Just

reshaping my head.' and he wore it the last time we flew. Instead of

a lot of curious stares I got a few more 'ah ha' looks.

http://www.cafepress.com/preciousbambino?s=preciousbambino & type=73

Sheila, mom to , 13 months, STARband 3/6-8/6, DOCband 9/6-?

> >

> > We went to the mall today and everyone was staring at Gabe. It

> made

> > me sad. My husband says Gabe doesn't care so who cares. Usually

> I

> am

> > not bothered (it's only been a week). But at the mall there were

> so

> > many people and I saw all these babies with perfect little heads

> and

> > it makes me sad. Everyone used to say " what a cute baby " and now

> the

> > just stare. I know it is vanity, and I shouldn't let it bother me

> but

> > it still makes me sad.

> > I missed out on my pregnancy b/c I was on bedrest and in the

> hospital

> > for three months and now I feel like part of his first year is

> being

> > taken away.

> > Just feeling sorry for myself today...

> >

> >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

He's in the Clarren helmet and they make them big so that they have to

grow into (they said it's a passive treatment) them and he seems to be

swimming in it.

> >

> > We went to the mall today and everyone was staring at Gabe. It

> made

> > me sad. My husband says Gabe doesn't care so who cares. Usually

> I

> am

> > not bothered (it's only been a week). But at the mall there were

> so

> > many people and I saw all these babies with perfect little heads

> and

> > it makes me sad. Everyone used to say " what a cute baby " and now

> the

> > just stare. I know it is vanity, and I shouldn't let it bother me

> but

> > it still makes me sad.

> > I missed out on my pregnancy b/c I was on bedrest and in the

> hospital

> > for three months and now I feel like part of his first year is

> being

> > taken away.

> > Just feeling sorry for myself today...

> >

> >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Sheila-

HOW CUTE! I want to order them all! Thanks for the link to the

website!!!

, mom to Tyson

Chicago,IL

> > >

> > > We went to the mall today and everyone was staring at Gabe.

It

> > made

> > > me sad. My husband says Gabe doesn't care so who cares.

Usually

> > I

> > am

> > > not bothered (it's only been a week). But at the mall there

were

> > so

> > > many people and I saw all these babies with perfect little

heads

> > and

> > > it makes me sad. Everyone used to say " what a cute baby " and

now

> > the

> > > just stare. I know it is vanity, and I shouldn't let it bother

me

> > but

> > > it still makes me sad.

> > > I missed out on my pregnancy b/c I was on bedrest and in the

> > hospital

> > > for three months and now I feel like part of his first year is

> > being

> > > taken away.

> > > Just feeling sorry for myself today...

> > >

> > >

> > >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Those are great- I am having to choose which ones to order since we

can't get them all

> > >

> > > We went to the mall today and everyone was staring at Gabe. It

> > made

> > > me sad. My husband says Gabe doesn't care so who cares. Usually

> > I

> > am

> > > not bothered (it's only been a week). But at the mall there were

> > so

> > > many people and I saw all these babies with perfect little heads

> > and

> > > it makes me sad. Everyone used to say " what a cute baby " and now

> > the

> > > just stare. I know it is vanity, and I shouldn't let it bother me

> > but

> > > it still makes me sad.

> > > I missed out on my pregnancy b/c I was on bedrest and in the

> > hospital

> > > for three months and now I feel like part of his first year is

> > being

> > > taken away.

> > > Just feeling sorry for myself today...

> > >

> > >

> > >

> >

>