Re: hard decision

[Guest guest]

Oh, I don't know what to say, . Except that you should do what's safest

for you and the baby.

It would not be fun to go through another birth like Trevor's. And remember,

the after pain gets worse with each child. Nobody told me that until my

third, Boone, was born. When the doc said the excruciating cramps were

normal and it gets worse after each birth, I asked, " Why doesn't anybody

tell you these things? " I thought it got easier with each birth.

" Only labor is easier -- and that's a myth, " he said.

ooO Now they tell me. Ooo

Sissi (who had her tubes tied without a second thought cuz' I ain't birthing

no more babies with this body)

[Guest guest]

Pictures!! you sound like my husband, it drove the doctors nuts that he wanted

pictures when he was all open like you were. We could trade and really gross

everyone out.

I had my son (all 10 lbs 2 oz) of him by Csection and had no problems

afterwards. I even caught the flu that my husband had when I delivered. I

think they sent you home too early!

cindy in Idaho

Re: hard decision

, I think we talked about this one night on messenger. I was 18

when I had Alyx. She got caught up in my pelvis too, and she was

born with shoulder dystocia...they dislocated her shoulder. She had

a year of therapy for her arm, and I suspect, that the lack of oxygen

during the whole thing may be why she has the problems that she

does. Of course, her real father is just whacko, so that might be it

too. She weighed only 7.3 so she wasn't a big baby at all. Ten

years later when I was pregnant with Zach, I decided right away to

have a c-section and the doctor agreed. Zach was only 6lbs. He was

completely healthy at birth. The complications I experienced post c-

section were horrendous. First, even though I was with fever and

chills the third day post op, I called the doctor (he had sent me

home 24 hrs after my C). He assured me it was just my milk coming

in. Only problem was, there was no milk at all. 4th day post op,

severe abdominal pains, like my stitches had ripped out..searing hot

pain where my incision was. Called Doc again...said 'see you

tomorrow'. Fifth day post op, went into the doctor's office. He

said " looks like you have a slight external infection in your

stitches " Sixth day post op...still fever of 102, husband is fed up

and takes me to the ER. Another doctor does blood work on me, my

white cells were through the roof. They admit me, and I'm seen by a

specialist (I called him my thinking doctor...he just advised the

surgeons on what to do next). One full week post op, I'm taken back

to surgery. I was told they would take out a little bit of tissue

and sew me up. When I woke up after surgery, my whole incision was

wide open; 8 inches long, 4 inches wide and 4 inches deep. I was

told the infection was way worse than they had anticipated, that I

was in sepsis, and they had to remove all that tissue and let me heal

from the inside out. I spent another two weeks in the hospital on

IV's and twice a day abdominal packings. I have pictures I can send

you of how horrible it really was, the description is nothing like

the pics. (If you can stomache that type of thing) I felt

mutilated. Would I do it over again? Yes I believe I would. With

Alyx damn near dying in birth, and then to have my son born healthy,

I think the hell I went through afterwards was worth it. It took me

3 months to completely heal. I did ask how often a revision of a c-

section is necessary, and my NEW Ob/Gyn said it happens quite often,

just probably not to the extent of mine. I think you and your doctor

should take into consideration the size of your pelvis, the weight of

the child, and then go from there. Most VBAC's are quite sucessful,

considering it's your third, hopefully your labor won't be long.

Just remember that all C-Sections do carry risk should you decide to

go that route.

> well, i have 12 more weeks to make my final choice, but at this

point, i'm really confused as what to do. kailey was a natural birth

and actually quite easy. i didn't even need any drugs. trevor, otoh,

got his big fat head stuck on my pelvis with his face up and i had to

have an emergency cesarean. during the surgery, my cervix ripped and

i lost two pints of blood and needed a transfusion. so...what do i do

this time? there's no medical reason, at this point anyway, that i

can't try for a VBAC, but do i risk it? i know there are arguments to

either side. i know my dr said it was safer for the baby to go with a

scheduled C, but then that's another major surgery for me. so, does

anybody have any good sound facts about the risks involved either

way? how about some personal stories about doing VBAC either

successfully or unsuccessfully? would anyone like to have this baby

for me? help!!!

>

>

> -------------------------

> gina, 31, ny

> single mom to -

> kailey, 8, autism, hyperlexia, depression, anxiety, OCD, DSI

> trevor, 3, multiple developmental delays, no " official " dx yet

> baby to be, due 7-25-03

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

And remember,

> the after pain gets worse with each child. Nobody told me that

until my

> third, Boone, was born. When the doc said the excruciating cramps

were

> normal and it gets worse after each birth, I asked, " Why doesn't

anybody

> tell you these things? " I thought it got easier with each birth.

>

> " Only labor is easier -- and that's a myth, " he said.

Labor for me is a pretty short piece of work. Afterpains are hell

revisted. JMHO.

[Guest guest]

I don't have a good story to tell I was about 3 months pregnant with no

insurance before I realized I was pregnant (denial I guess). So the date was

in question. was probably a week late but with the dates I was using I

thought she was three weeks early. I went to the hospital at 2am 7 cm

dilated and had her at 7:45 that morning with no problems. I did however

miss the birthing class which was scheduled for 8 am. They did all come to

visit me however.

Can't they measure the baby and tell you if that would be an issue? That was

what they told me at 4 months might be a problem but it wasn't.

[Guest guest]

Oh, , I just do not know. I am a natural childbirth person by

conviction, but I have always had problem-free births which makes that

conviction easy.

Trevor was posterior? Enrique was posterior and even though he was my

smallest baby, it was REALLY hard getting him out. But, in the end, no such

dire methods as emergency c-sections were needed so I did not have your

experience.

My next four were not posterior and not being posterior is the usual thing

for babies.

But, if posterior is a minority, it is a common minority. And usually the

baby can be born naturally anyway, so even if your next baby is posterior,

you do not know if you will need an emergency c-section.

So logically it would seem reasonable to try for a VBAC.

However, Trevor's birth sounds scary enough that I have not a clue what I

would do if I were in your shoes (helpful, huh?) I have a friend (well, I

had a friend before autism but I never see her now) who lost her first baby

because, basically, the midwife waited too long to send her to the hospital

to do a c-section. She planned a VBAC for her second, but then she realized

that she was terrified of natural births and felt safer with a c-section.

Her third she never even considered for a VBAC. I always understood her

feelings on this. So perhaps you would just feel safer with a scheduled

c-section. If your experience with Trevor's birth was so much an experience

that you do not want to repeat, you may simply be happier with the c-section

and the guarantee that no horrible hideous emergency c-section will be

required.

I do not like the thought of you recovering from major surgery in your

menagerie; I do hope you can line up some good supports????

Salli who has just answered " Yes, " and " No, " or to poor 's question

[Guest guest]

> I think the hell I went through afterwards was worth it. It took me

> 3 months to completely heal.

YIKES! This is one of the most horrific birth stories I have ever heard and

I have heard some scary ones. Although in yours everyone is alive so in

fact it is better than the other kind....

I did ask how often a revision of a c-

> section is necessary, and my NEW Ob/Gyn said it happens quite often,

> just probably not to the extent of mine. I think you and your doctor

> should take into consideration the size of your pelvis, the weight of

> the child, and then go from there. Most VBAC's are quite sucessful,

> considering it's your third, hopefully your labor won't be long.

> Just remember that all C-Sections do carry risk should you decide to

> go that route.

>

>

Yes. It is something to keep in mind. Although would be fine with the

VBAC, I think, if someone could guarantee her that she won't need a

c-section, which, of course, no one can do.

Salli

[Guest guest]

When the doc said the excruciating cramps

> were

> > normal and it gets worse after each birth, I asked, " Why doesn't

> anybody

> > tell you these things? " I thought it got easier with each birth.

> >

Well, that is NOT my experience. My hardest labor was my smallest baby,

Enrique, 6 lbs. 5 oz. was so fast that I never finished the paper

work in the hospital (he was 7 lbs. 14 oz.) Sophie was my easiest birth of

all and she weighed 9 lbs. I was laughing and joking with the midwives

almost up to the last push (oh, and I bit Lou on the arm which was fun).

Putter was a bit harder as he had broad shoulders, but when I asked my

midwife if I hadn't pushed an awfully long time, she shrugged and looked at

her notes, " Seven minutes? " she told me. Um, I guess not. It seemed long.

Robbie was a great and easy birth, the first that I ran entirely my own way

by totally refusing to push just because I don't like pushing. That worked

fine, but he finally just came out, pushing or no pushing. But I lost a bit

of blood at his birth and fainted afterwards. I normally felt ready to work

in the fields, but not that time. Just old? Maybe.

So I think that doctor may have been wrong. Labor varies from baby to baby.

Sometimes it's worse and sometimes it is better. It just depends on so many

variables that you cannot predict.

Salli

[Guest guest]

> Sissi (who had her tubes tied without a second thought cuz' I ain't birthing

no more babies with this body) <

ha, yeah, i'm planning on that too

[Guest guest]

> Can't they measure the baby and tell you if that would be an issue? That was

what they told me at 4 months might be a problem but it wasn't.

<

trevor was actually smaller than kailey. i think he was 7-13 and 21in, while she

was 8-15 and 22in

[Guest guest]

> YIKES! This is one of the most horrific birth stories I have ever heard and I

have heard some scary ones. Although in yours everyone is alive so in fact it

is better than the other kind.... <

yeah well, what she didn't tell you was that they left this big gaping hole open

forever. they never stitched it back up! you gota see the pic, it's wild

[Guest guest]

, I scheduled 's birth after I couldn't deliver .

Sue

[Guest guest]

I definitely think they sent you hope too early! My Doc kept me in for 4

days after both c-sections! Then of course the Doc that didn't send you to

the hospital immediately after you called the first time was not the most

competent sounding!

Sue

[Guest guest]

> yeah well, what she didn't tell you was that they left this big gaping

hole open forever. they never stitched it back up! you gota see the pic,

it's wild

>

Oh, tell me you are kidding? You are, right????

Salli

[Guest guest]

> Oh, tell me you are kidding? You are, right????

Salli <

not this time

[Guest guest]

> My Doc kept me in for 4 days after both c-sections! <

i think we were meant to stay for 3 days after, but got an extra day due to a

blizzard!

[Guest guest]

,

First, I apologize for last night. I was not done with that mess I was

working on until 1230. The kids were being such a pain when we got home

that I screwed up twice and deleted it once, and it goes down hill from

there.

Anyway, 7 kids. First one was a c-section. Rest of them were VBAC. No

problems.

Georga Hackworth

Men. Can't live with 'em...can't trade 'em in for their weight in

chocolate.

Enter to win $50 worth of free books http://www.ubah.com/F1549

hard decision

> well, i have 12 more weeks to make my final choice, but at this point, i'm

really confused as what to do. kailey was a natural birth and actually quite

easy. i didn't even need any drugs. trevor, otoh, got his big fat head stuck

on my pelvis with his face up and i had to have an emergency cesarean.

during the surgery, my cervix ripped and i lost two pints of blood and

needed a transfusion. so...what do i do this time? there's no medical

reason, at this point anyway, that i can't try for a VBAC, but do i risk it?

i know there are arguments to either side. i know my dr said it was safer

for the baby to go with a scheduled C, but then that's another major surgery

for me. so, does anybody have any good sound facts about the risks involved

either way? how about some personal stories about doing VBAC either

successfully or unsuccessfully? would anyone like to have this baby for me?

help!!!

>

>

> -------------------------

> gina, 31, ny

> single mom to -

> kailey, 8, autism, hyperlexia, depression, anxiety, OCD, DSI

> trevor, 3, multiple developmental delays, no " official " dx yet

> baby to be, due 7-25-03

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

>

> Sissi (who had her tubes tied without a second thought cuz' I ain't

birthing

> no more babies with this body)

LMAO that's EXACTLY how I felt too! During my c, I remember telling

the doctor, " ok you;re cutting them far apart right, did you get both

sides, why don't you cauterize them just to make sure! " Then asked

the nurse to go check and make double sure he got them both. lol

Hey , that's one positive to having a c, they do the tube tying

right then and there, if you're considering it.

[Guest guest]

There was a reason he sent me home early. When I was 6 months

pregnant, I tested positive for MRSA in my lungs, the resistant nasty

staph bacteria. I was treated, but never re-cultured. (Bad on my

doc's part). When I was admitted to the hospital, as hospitals do,

they freaked and slapped me under precautions (everyone entering my

room had to wear gloves masks gowns..etc). They wouldn't even let me

touch my own baby without gowning and wearing a mask and gloves. The

hospital absoulutely does not want MRSA on their maternity ward, and

I completely understood that. It's a safety issue for other people.

Since I had lots of support at home, they all felt (as well as I)

that going home would be best. They cultured me the first time in

the hospital, and three subsequent times after I came back. The day

I was released from the hospital for the second surgery, they felt

safe enough to take me off precautions lol.

My Ob/Gyn was the same for both of my children. I credited with

saving my daughter's life the first time around. He was a fairly new

doctor at that time, and he was just so caring and wonderful, that is

why I insisted on having him for my son. When I went in for my

initial with Zach, i told him he was the one who had delivered my

daughter with shoulder dystocia, and he said " OHHHHHH I REMEMBER

YOU...yeah, C-section definately, that was one of my scariest

deliveries. "

Boy what a difference ten years can make, huh?

By the way, my mom is in the process of looking to sue him, not for

what happened to me, but because she went to him a year and half ago

about a lump in her breast that he said was benign, and was removed

this past December as cancer.

I totally believe in having your children in a hospital with a fetal

heart tone monitor in place. I resisted this, but was probably the

only thing that indicated my daughter was in distress. I should

clarify, that she was stuck in my birth canal, with her shoulder

stuck behind my pelvic bone, but the cord was wrapped around her neck

and suffocating her. She was far enough out that they couldn't push

her back in and do a c.

wrote:

> I definitely think they sent you hope too early! My Doc kept me in

for 4

> days after both c-sections! Then of course the Doc that didn't

send you to

> the hospital immediately after you called the first time was not

the most

> competent sounding!

> Sue

[Guest guest]

Nope, not kidding.

> > yeah well, what she didn't tell you was that they left this big

gaping

> hole open forever. they never stitched it back up! you gota see the

pic,

> it's wild

> >

>

> Oh, tell me you are kidding? You are, right????

>

> Salli

[Guest guest]

Hallelujah!

<wink><wink>

Penny :-D

Re: hard decision

> Sissi (who had her tubes tied without a second thought cuz' I ain't

birthing no more babies with this body) <

ha, yeah, i'm planning on that too

[Guest guest]

> Hallelujah!

<wink><wink>

Penny :-D <

shut up :-P

[Guest guest]

> Trevor was posterior? <

yes maam, he was. his face was caught on my pelvis. he was SO bruised from it.

he also had a huge head, was in the 95th percentile. they did a sono right away,

but it was fine. when he was 18mo, his head measured off the charts, probably

around 120%. i asked them to do another sono, just in case. they did and he was

fine

> you may simply be happier with the c-section and the guarantee that no

horrible hideous emergency c-section will be required. <

yes, that's what i'm thinking. i read something that said 60-80% of VBAC's were

successful. that's not really a high enough percentage for my taste :-/

> I do not like the thought of you recovering from major surgery in your

menagerie; I do hope you can line up some good supports???? <

MY menagerie?

actually, we plan to stay with my mom for the recovery time, regardless of which

way it goes. plus kailey, trevor, and james will all be in summer session, so it

shouldn't be too bad

[Guest guest]

>

> > I do not like the thought of you recovering from major surgery in your

menagerie; I do hope you can line up some good supports???? <

>

> MY menagerie?

Well, keep in mind, I have recovered from births among a menagerie your

family size or larger three times now. And not after major surgery so I have

a very good idea of what life would be like for you.

Staying with your mom sounds pretty good. What you really need is an

expensive hotel with childcare and room service but I guess that ain't gonna

happen.

Salli

[Guest guest]

> What you really need is an expensive hotel with childcare and room service but

I guess that ain't gonna happen. <

sure it'll happen. what do you think the hospital's for?

[Guest guest]

> sure it'll happen. what do you think the hospital's for?

>

>

>

>

I hear ya ! When I had a year ago, I was in heaven.

Got waited on, and someone else did the 2 am feeding. They were

surprised when I asked for the baby to go to the nursery, but I told

them he was my third child, the novelity has worn off!