~Wolf's Abuse Story~

[Guest guest]

Hello Family,

I said I would share my story so I will tell as much as I can for now here.

I hope it can help someone else with what they have endured.

As I was growing up I was the oldest of 3 children, in a middle class home.

Our home was full of love & affection. However it was a VERY strict home. My

step-father was a man who had made a lot of mistakes and been in a lot of

trouble as a young man so he wanted to make sure his kids did not do the same.

My step-father was a hard man. He worked long hard hours to provide well for

his family therefore we were expected to be very quiet when he was at home so he

could watch TV, do his book work and relax. (You know the saying children should

be seen and not heard), we had to ask permission to speak, we NEVER said we

didn't like something that was on our dinner plate or we was knocked away from

the table and our plate taken. Mother tried very hard to make sure she didn't

put anything on our plates that we didn't like so that we'd be allowed to eat.

We got a spanking EVERY Friday night so we would behave the next week. If we

didn't behave we got a worse one at that time as punishment, but we would also

get our regular Fri. night one as well. Mother tried to make up for it as much

as she could, she took us and a camper full of kids skating each Thursday night

trying to make up for the spanking she knew we would receive the following

night.

On one occasion I was sent to the store to buy an item that cost 75 cents. I

was sent with 1 dollar. I decided while I was there that I wanted some candy so

I spent that quarter on a candy bar & soda. When I returned and Daddy asked for

his change I said I had lost it. He asked me how I got the candy bar & soda. I

lied to him and said I had found a quarter. Young, Dumb kid of 10. If I had just

said I spent the quarter I would have been OK because we got whatever we really

wanted that money could buy. BUT, I LIED! Daddy had a NEW 2 inch solid leather

belt and it was still very stiff. He jerked that belt off and started spanking

me and it got harder and harder. He totally lost control because I had told him

a lie & stolen the quarter. He broke that belt in half beating me. Mother had to

run get a neighbor man to pull him off of me because he was beating me so bad.

When all was said and done I had huge bruises from my lower buttocks to my feet

with cuts open and blood running down my legs. That was the worst beating I have

ever had. He didn't do it to be mean, he did it out of LOVE because he had spent

so much time in jail for theft and I had stolen the quarter and lied about it

instead of just asking if I could have it. He did not want me to grow up a

thief.

As life would have it he died when I was 12. Mother had lived such a strict

life with him as did we kids that after his death she became a party woman. She

was gone a lot and we had a burglar one night that had broken the window beside

the front door so he could reach in and unlock the door. My and my girlfriend

was babysitting my little brother and sister and we knew he was out there and we

were afraid. So I had a butcher knife and was hiding behind the front door out

of view of the window. When this man stuck his hand through that window to

unlock the door I hit his arm with the knife and cut it to the bone. While I was

doing this my friend called the police and they arrived just after my striking

him and caught him. As the cops were taking him away he turned and told me that

he would be back one day and he would get me.

My mother married another man a short time after this. The man that had

tried to break in had made friends with my new step-father and my mother. We did

not know at the time that it was the same man who had tried to break in. I had a

car " 63 Impala " even though I was not yet old enough to drive. Remember us kids

had what we wanted that money could buy? Well this man asked to use my car one

night to go to his Father's house. Since it was my car my Step-father had me go

with this man as he used my car. The man took me out on a deserted road and

raped me and stabbed me 3 times while I was fighting him. He convinced me that

if I told he would kill me! I fully believed he would so I kept quiet about it

and just dressed my wounds as I could and somehow hid it from my parents.

Needless to say I have a very nasty scar that only healed over on the surface

because I didn't receive medical help.

As if that were not bad enough this man finally moved in with us as a place

to stay and the rapes continued for almost a year! I was terrified that he would

cut me or kill me if I ever told. Well one night I was ironing what I was going

to wear the following day to school and Bobby started in on me again. I was

mouthing at him and he threw my western belt at me and the buckle cut my ankle

when it hit me. He came over and grabbed me to shut me up and when he did I

planted that hot iron right in the middle of his bare back (he didn't have a

shirt on). I just snapped I didn't care if he did kill me at this point. Of

course he went to screaming because the hot iron had caused a 3rd degree burn on

his back. My parents came flying in the room at his screams. When I explained

what had happened I told my parents ALL! They of course kicked him out of the

house at once, but they decided NOT to call the police and report it because

they didn't want to put me through having to appear in court and everyone

knowing what had happened to me. They felt I had been through enough and of

course I never wanted to have to face that man again. I since have wished it had

been reported because his abuse didn't stop there.

I had met and even married a man in the next year, (I was 14). But Bobby's

abuse had continued. He had drug me out of the school house by the hair of my

head once, tried to run over me when I'd be walking home from school, he even

tried to kill my husband on 2 occasions. He always said if he couldn't have me

NO MAN WOULD! Things would finally come to a head when he raped & bit the nipple

off his own 3 year old daughter. He was sent to prison. I happened to be walking

at the time the police car was transporting him to prison, it was summer " early

1970's " and was very hot, so the back window on the police car was rolled down.

He yelled at me out the window and told me he'd be out one day and the world

wasn't big enough for me to hide in that he would get me someday! I lived in

fear of him being released for many years. When I found out he was being

released years later I moved to another town. Luckily I have never again

encountered that man.

That is far from the end of the story though. In the 90's I was living in

Ga. and met a man who decided he was in Love with me. I didn't care for this man

in this way but that didn't stop him, he broke into my home and raped me. When

he was being released a few days later I had a Ryder truck rented and I ran like

hell. I moved back to Tx.. It wasn't 2 months after I moved that he found me in

Tx.. He knew what town in Tx. I was from and he happened to find someone that

knew me and knowing no better they told him where I lived. But I involved the

law and they ran him out of town and told him to never come back. That didn't

stop him either. No matter where I moved he always found me, he also sent cards

with wedding bands taped to them and threatened me that I would marry him or

he'd kill me. I kept running and this man stalked me for 7 years. I moved to Wi.

trying to get away and he had even found my location but not my home and we were

even in the same place at the same time and somehow God made me invisible for he

never seen me. A few days later a man beat him bad and then shot him in the head

and killed him. So that is where that story ended.

Even at age 50 however, being back in Tx. and only a few miles from the town

I grew up in I still fear walking face to face with Bobby the one from my teen

years. I am much stronger today and don't fear him ever raping me again, what

scares me is I have blocked out what he looked like and also with much age on

him I am scared I wouldn't even know him if I did walk face to face with him. I

figure he would know me as my looks haven't changed that much, just older. So I

fear coming face to face with him one day and not even knowing it's him.

OK this is long enough and that is part of my tragic life that you now know.

I don't let the fear consume me, I trust the Lord to keep him away and go about

living me life. That is where these 3 tragic things from my life stand. This is

NOTHING near my entire story but I hope it gives you some insight to my life and

how abuse has affected me in terms of Fibro!

God Bless!

Rev. /Wolf

Owner & Founder