Re: Tired of discouraging people

[Guest guest]

I would only tell people that I knew would be behind me on this. I didn't want

to hear it from somebody like you said who has no idea what we go threw

everyday. I'm sorry you did not get the support you needed.......

Mike in CA

Tired of discouraging people

We went to a funeral on Thursday.My moms cousin was there whom she

hasn't seen in years.She is a nurse.My mom sat down & started

talking about her health problems.Somehow I got dragged into the

conversation about my going to be approved for the surgery.

The lady told me not to have the surgery because everyone who has it

has problems.She said just start walking & you will see,the weight

will come off.

I tried to explain to her how my knee joints are grinding together &

causing me extreme pain and also my lower back locks up.

She said just bite your lip & force yourself to do it.You can do

it.You are just making excuses.The surgery is a bad thing to have.

I was sooo mad I just stormed away like a 5 year old.I am tired of

people who are NOT in my body,not knowing how I feel,telling me what

they think is right.They are not in my situation to make the

decision!

Did anyone else go though this?

Thanks for listening to my rant )

Kim

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Robyn@...

[Guest guest]

Kim - I've heard it for years. My family thinks I should just " pull myself up

by my bootstraps " when I'm in depression and " force " myself to be happy / be

active / clean my apartment / go for walks / etc / etc... I feel like part

(though certainly not all) of my depression is tied to my weight and that if I

were healthier I'd be happier. My therapist and shrink seem to agree with me.

The only person really against my having this surgery is my PCP - whom I'm

meeting to argue with on Monday. I'm flat out telling him that if he can't

support my decision then I'm getting a new doctor. My family is behind my

decision to have surgery, but my best friend claims to have seen something on

" 60 Minutes " or some other news magzine show that said people who have gastric

bypass have a life-expectancy of 15 years! I've been able to find NO PROOF of

this so-called story anywhere on the net. I know my best friend loves me and

that she surely saw SOMETHING about WLS - but I " m sure she

misunderstood it. I'm also sure there's a little part of her that dreads the

idea of me being thinner than she is - she's always been the smaller of us two.

They say that is one of the things we have to deal with after WLS is our

changing relatioships with those who are closest to us. I don't think I'll lose

any friends over this, but even if I expected to I wouldn't change my mind.

Mindy

wrote:

We went to a funeral on Thursday.My moms cousin was there whom she

hasn't seen in years.She is a nurse.My mom sat down & started

talking about her health problems.Somehow I got dragged into the

conversation about my going to be approved for the surgery.

The lady told me not to have the surgery because everyone who has it

has problems.She said just start walking & you will see,the weight

will come off.

I tried to explain to her how my knee joints are grinding together &

causing me extreme pain and also my lower back locks up.

She said just bite your lip & force yourself to do it.You can do

it.You are just making excuses.The surgery is a bad thing to have.

I was sooo mad I just stormed away like a 5 year old.I am tired of

people who are NOT in my body,not knowing how I feel,telling me what

they think is right.They are not in my situation to make the

decision!

Did anyone else go though this?

Thanks for listening to my rant )

Kim

---------------------------------

Yahoo! Messenger with Voice. PC-to-Phone calls for ridiculously low rates.

[Guest guest]

That show might have said that people that qualify for the surgery have a life

expectancy of 15 years if they don't have the surgery. MY GOD TELL ME IM RIGHT

AND YOUR FRIEND IS WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My heart almost stopped when I read your post.......

Mike in CA

Re: Tired of discouraging people

Kim - I've heard it for years. My family thinks I should just " pull myself up

by my bootstraps " when I'm in depression and " force " myself to be happy / be

active / clean my apartment / go for walks / etc / etc... I feel like part

(though certainly not all) of my depression is tied to my weight and that if I

were healthier I'd be happier. My therapist and shrink seem to agree with me.

The only person really against my having this surgery is my PCP - whom I'm

meeting to argue with on Monday. I'm flat out telling him that if he can't

support my decision then I'm getting a new doctor. My family is behind my

decision to have surgery, but my best friend claims to have seen something on

" 60 Minutes " or some other news magzine show that said people who have gastric

bypass have a life-expectancy of 15 years! I've been able to find NO PROOF of

this so-called story anywhere on the net. I know my best friend loves me and

that she surely saw SOMETHING about WLS - but I " m sure she

misunderstood it. I'm also sure there's a little part of her that dreads the

idea of me being thinner than she is - she's always been the smaller of us two.

They say that is one of the things we have to deal with after WLS is our

changing relatioships with those who are closest to us. I don't think I'll lose

any friends over this, but even if I expected to I wouldn't change my mind.

Mindy

wrote:

We went to a funeral on Thursday.My moms cousin was there whom she

hasn't seen in years.She is a nurse.My mom sat down & started

talking about her health problems.Somehow I got dragged into the

conversation about my going to be approved for the surgery.

The lady told me not to have the surgery because everyone who has it

has problems.She said just start walking & you will see,the weight

will come off.

I tried to explain to her how my knee joints are grinding together &

causing me extreme pain and also my lower back locks up.

She said just bite your lip & force yourself to do it.You can do

it.You are just making excuses.The surgery is a bad thing to have.

I was sooo mad I just stormed away like a 5 year old.I am tired of

people who are NOT in my body,not knowing how I feel,telling me what

they think is right.They are not in my situation to make the

decision!

Did anyone else go though this?

Thanks for listening to my rant )

Kim

---------------------------------

Yahoo! Messenger with Voice. PC-to-Phone calls for ridiculously low rates.

[Guest guest]

Mike - I agree I only tell a very few people what is going on - My

mom on the other hand can't keep her mouth closed.I think she is

scared for me & thats why - Thanks for the support &

understanding )

Kim

>

> I would only tell people that I knew would be behind me on this. I

didn't want to hear it from somebody like you said who has no idea

what we go threw everyday. I'm sorry you did not get the support you

needed.......

>

> Mike in CA

>

>

> Tired of discouraging people

>

>

> We went to a funeral on Thursday.My moms cousin was there whom

she

> hasn't seen in years.She is a nurse.My mom sat down & started

> talking about her health problems.Somehow I got dragged into the

> conversation about my going to be approved for the surgery.

>

> The lady told me not to have the surgery because everyone who

has it

> has problems.She said just start walking & you will see,the

weight

> will come off.

>

> I tried to explain to her how my knee joints are grinding

together &

> causing me extreme pain and also my lower back locks up.

>

> She said just bite your lip & force yourself to do it.You can do

> it.You are just making excuses.The surgery is a bad thing to

have.

>

> I was sooo mad I just stormed away like a 5 year old.I am tired

of

> people who are NOT in my body,not knowing how I feel,telling me

what

> they think is right.They are not in my situation to make the

> decision!

>

> Did anyone else go though this?

>

> Thanks for listening to my rant )

>

> Kim

>

>

>

>

>

>

> We are a very active support group.

> If the email becomes overwhelming,

> please change your setting to NO EMAIL!

> Please contact Group Creator

> Robyn@...

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Mindy I believe I too will be happier when I am thin.Although I

don't go to therapy currently,if I get denied once again on Thurday

I probably will start going.

My mom & sister saw something on 60 mnutes about the whole suregry

procedure,not sure exactly what,but that was when they started to

try to convince me to not do surgery

Good luck to you! Thanks for sharing - Kim

> We went to a funeral on Thursday.My moms cousin was there whom

she

> hasn't seen in years.She is a nurse.My mom sat down & started

> talking about her health problems.Somehow I got dragged into the

> conversation about my going to be approved for the surgery.

>

> The lady told me not to have the surgery because everyone who has

it

> has problems.She said just start walking & you will see,the weight

> will come off.

>

> I tried to explain to her how my knee joints are grinding together

&

> causing me extreme pain and also my lower back locks up.

>

> She said just bite your lip & force yourself to do it.You can do

> it.You are just making excuses.The surgery is a bad thing to have.

>

> I was sooo mad I just stormed away like a 5 year old.I am tired of

> people who are NOT in my body,not knowing how I feel,telling me

what

> they think is right.They are not in my situation to make the

> decision!

>

> Did anyone else go though this?

>

> Thanks for listening to my rant )

>

> Kim

>

>

>

> ---------------------------------

> Yahoo! Messenger with Voice. PC-to-Phone calls for ridiculously

low rates.

>

>

[Guest guest]

Kim,

I went through this too. I didn't tell alot of people about my

surgery because of this. My Dad was totally freaked out!! My parents

and siblings are all thin and fit. I was the only one who was

overweight. LOL even at the weight I am now I'm still bigger than my

Mom and Sister. They weight about 105lbs - 110lbs and they are 5'1

and 5'3. My Dad did not want me to have this surgery. He found a

physiatrist (sp??) that deals with food addictions. He insisted that

I go see this person before surgery. I told him I love him BUT I am

going to do this!! Well it is now been almost 2 years since I've had

surgery. I'm bouncing in between 145 lbs – 149lbs.. I'm healthy and

VERY active. He is thrilled!!! He is happy that I did what I did. It

has given me my life back. I would just be careful who you tell.

Maybe wait until after surgery and after you start losing weight

before you tell anybody else. I realize your Mom spilled the beans on

this one but maybe ask her not to talk to others about it.

Good luck Hun!!! I know it is hard!!!

HUGS!!!!!!!!!

>

> We went to a funeral on Thursday.My moms cousin was there whom she

> hasn't seen in years.She is a nurse.My mom sat down & started

> talking about her health problems.Somehow I got dragged into the

> conversation about my going to be approved for the surgery.

>

> The lady told me not to have the surgery because everyone who has

it

> has problems.She said just start walking & you will see,the weight

> will come off.

>

> I tried to explain to her how my knee joints are grinding together

&

> causing me extreme pain and also my lower back locks up.

>

> She said just bite your lip & force yourself to do it.You can do

> it.You are just making excuses.The surgery is a bad thing to have.

>

> I was sooo mad I just stormed away like a 5 year old.I am tired of

> people who are NOT in my body,not knowing how I feel,telling me

what

> they think is right.They are not in my situation to make the

> decision!

>

> Did anyone else go though this?

>

> Thanks for listening to my rant )

>

> Kim

>

[Guest guest]

Hi !

I too am larger than my mom and always was larger than my sister.

My dad paid $250 for me to go to a hypnotist because he really

doesn't believe in this surgery . It worked for like 2 months & then

I won a trip to Utah from Pepsi & there it all went down hill.

Nothing healthy available to eat & I lost it from there.

I told my mom not to tell people but she does have a blabbing

problem,LOL

>

I am sticking to this unless (like I said before) my comlaint

against the ins. co is denied again Thursday.

Then I am back to square 1 -

Thanks for your advice,Kim

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

wrote:

We went to a funeral on Thursday.My moms cousin was there whom she

hasn't seen in years.She is a nurse.My mom sat down & started

talking about her health problems.Somehow I got dragged into the

conversation about my going to be approved for the surgery.

The lady told me not to have the surgery because everyone who has it

has problems.She said just start walking & you will see,the weight

will come off.

I tried to explain to her how my knee joints are grinding together &

causing me extreme pain and also my lower back locks up.

She said just bite your lip & force yourself to do it.You can do

it.You are just making excuses.The surgery is a bad thing to have.

I was sooo mad I just stormed away like a 5 year old.I am tired of

people who are NOT in my body,not knowing how I feel,telling me what

they think is right.They are not in my situation to make the

decision!

Did anyone else go though this?

Thanks for listening to my rant )

Kim

~~~~~~~~~~

Hi Kim,

Oh gosh, I can't even remember how many times I've received the " you can do it

if you just try " speech about losing weight. Family, friends, doctors,

ex-boyfriends - people who have probably never been beyond 20lbs overweight in

their life think that all we have to do is decide to lose weight. If that were

the case I highly doubt any of us would have ever become obese.

So far, I'm only receiving opposition concerning my considering weight loss

surgery from one family member, but I think it's mostly because she doesn't

truly understand what it's like to be this big and has limited knowledge about

the benefits of having the surgery done.

Miana

---------------------------------

Blab-away for as little as 1¢/min. Make PC-to-Phone Calls using Yahoo!

Messenger with Voice.

[Guest guest]

Miana I'm wishing you positive energy to get this surgery done,since

the support has been low.All my pasts have been as you wrote so Good

luck to both of us to beat this!

Kim

> We went to a funeral on Thursday.My moms cousin was there whom

she

> hasn't seen in years.She is a nurse.My mom sat down & started

> talking about her health problems.Somehow I got dragged into the

> conversation about my going to be approved for the surgery.

>

> The lady told me not to have the surgery because everyone who has

it

> has problems.She said just start walking & you will see,the weight

> will come off.

>

> I tried to explain to her how my knee joints are grinding together

&

> causing me extreme pain and also my lower back locks up.

>

> She said just bite your lip & force yourself to do it.You can do

> it.You are just making excuses.The surgery is a bad thing to have.

>

> I was sooo mad I just stormed away like a 5 year old.I am tired of

> people who are NOT in my body,not knowing how I feel,telling me

what

> they think is right.They are not in my situation to make the

> decision!

>

> Did anyone else go though this?

>

> Thanks for listening to my rant )

>

> Kim

> ~~~~~~~~~~

>

> Hi Kim,

>

> Oh gosh, I can't even remember how many times I've received

the " you can do it if you just try " speech about losing weight.

Family, friends, doctors, ex-boyfriends - people who have probably

never been beyond 20lbs overweight in their life think that all we

have to do is decide to lose weight. If that were the case I highly

doubt any of us would have ever become obese.

> So far, I'm only receiving opposition concerning my considering

weight loss surgery from one family member, but I think it's mostly

because she doesn't truly understand what it's like to be this big

and has limited knowledge about the benefits of having the surgery

done.

>

> Miana

>

>

> ---------------------------------

> Blab-away for as little as 1¢/min. Make PC-to-Phone Calls using

Yahoo! Messenger with Voice.

>

>