Re: FIL Had Hallucination Over the Weekend...

May 22, 2006

April, this is the sort of thing I am careful about. In stead of telling

your FIL NO! How about, " I'll see what I can do, " and go off letting him think

the BIL is trying to do something about it. Your FIL will get over it. Your

BIL needs a packet of excuses to change the subject each time. Divert the FIL's

attention.

Get over Hallucinations? NO! Not from what I have been learning. In fact

they tend to get worse, especially if they are of a violent or agitated nature.

He needs to be watched carefully.

Imogene

In a message dated 5/22/2006 8:21:51 AM Central Daylight Time,

aswest1021@... writes:

My husband talked to my BIL last night. He informed my husband that

my FIL had a hallucination over the weekend. Apparently, when he was

in bed at night, he told my MIL that he needed a gun. When she asked

him why, he told her that there was a bag of a million dollars at the

foot of their bed and a banker told him he needed a gun to protect

it. That is so hard to see happen. It truly makes you feel as though

your LO is losing his/her mind. I'm not sure how my MIL got him past

that. As I've said here before, my FIL has always been somewhat of a

gun fanatic. Once he began hoarding guns all over the house, my MIL

and BIL took them and locked them in a gun safe. My BIL said last

night that my FIL is mad at him because he keeps asking for a gun and

my BIL tells him, " NO! " Just imagine what could happen if he did have

a gun available and he had another hallucination? Can we expect the

hallucinations to continue or will they eventually subside? He's on

Seroquel and has been for some time.

Thanks,

April

May 22, 2006

Donna, there is a problem with a toy gun. If the family has to call the

police because the man is so violent and aggressive due to the illness, ( and

he

cand get that way) then the police may shoot him, thinking it is a real gun.

That happened right here in our town.

Imogene

In a message dated 5/22/2006 8:40:08 AM Central Daylight Time,

twomido@... writes:

April,

I wonder how a toy gun might help to satisify him? We seem to keep

replacing other things and if guns are his thing, it might work. A squirt gun

might

make him feel safe and in all likely hood he will not know the difference.

We think they will but they don't, especially at night in the middle of what

he is going through. I am sure he will get through this phase, but they sure

do seem to know when people are taking things away from them. And until it

doesn't make any difference, and that point comes, it may just work without

hurting anyone.

Donna R

Do you want to read more about Lewy Body? You can also read the Thistle, the

LBD Newsletter. Just click on:

May 22, 2006

Thanks, Donna. Yes, my FIL does mostly want a gun for protection at

home and at night, but he's also made the comment about needing a

gun at various times to protect my MIL. Maybe I am assuming too

much here. You are probably right in saying that he won't know the

difference between a toy gun and a real one. I guess the only way

to know for sure is to give it a try. If it works, it definitely

would save my MIL a lot of aggravation, loss of sleep, and worry.

April

-- In LBDcaregivers , " Donna Mido "

wrote:

>

> April,

>

> When you have talked about him wanting one it has been at home or

at night if I remember right. What he is saying seems to be I need

protection in my own home. If I read your messages correctly.

>

> Paint it bright coral. I am really imagining he won't know the

difference. I'll even bet you can put big letters on it that says

TOY GUN and he won't know. I know what you are talking about but

you are assuming he is reasoning and he is not. At least it doesn't

seem like he is to me by your report. My Mom who could and had

obsession with money couldn't tell real coins from chocolate one!

And that was real early on. I am betting you could even get one of

those big ones that shoots soft balls and he won't know the

difference and no one will mistake that for a real gun. It sure

would be worth a try when your MIL in trying to sleep in the middle

of the night.

>

> But you need to be the best judge of that. I just remember I gave

Mom far to much credit for what she knew. And she did know stuff,

but she couldn't reason. And my daughter would try outrageous stuff

and it worked.

>

> Donna R

>

> Do you want to read more about Lewy Body? You can also read the

Thistle, the LBD Newsletter. Just click on:

>

> http://www.lewybodydementia.org

>

> Re: FIL Had Hallucination Over the

Weekend...

>

May 22, 2006

April,

What about getting the toy gun and leaving on kitchen table or

someplace that your FIL will see it and see how he reacts? If he knows

it's not a real gun then he can be told it's a gift for a child in the

family.

in Dallas

> >

> > April,

> >

> > When you have talked about him wanting one it has been at home or

> at night if I remember right. What he is saying seems to be I need

> protection in my own home. If I read your messages correctly.

> >

> > Paint it bright coral. I am really imagining he won't know the

> difference. I'll even bet you can put big letters on it that says

> TOY GUN and he won't know. I know what you are talking about but

> you are assuming he is reasoning and he is not. At least it doesn't

> seem like he is to me by your report. My Mom who could and had

> obsession with money couldn't tell real coins from chocolate one!

> And that was real early on. I am betting you could even get one of

> those big ones that shoots soft balls and he won't know the

> difference and no one will mistake that for a real gun. It sure

> would be worth a try when your MIL in trying to sleep in the middle

> of the night.

> >

> > But you need to be the best judge of that. I just remember I gave

> Mom far to much credit for what she knew. And she did know stuff,

> but she couldn't reason. And my daughter would try outrageous stuff

> and it worked.

> >

> > Donna R

> >

> > Do you want to read more about Lewy Body? You can also read the

> Thistle, the LBD Newsletter. Just click on:

> >

> > http://www.lewybodydementia.org

> >

> > Re: FIL Had Hallucination Over the

> Weekend...

> >

May 22, 2006

What a sneaky, good idea. See what LBD makes us be. Ha!

Myrna (68) in Missouri

Caregiver for Husband Jerry (70)

Diagnosed AD 1997, LBD 2004

Re: FIL Had Hallucination Over the

> Weekend...

> >

May 22, 2006

,

Great idea! I'll pass it on to my MIL and have her give it a try.

April

> > >

> > > April,

> > >

> > > When you have talked about him wanting one it has been at home

or

> > at night if I remember right. What he is saying seems to be I

need

> > protection in my own home. If I read your messages correctly.

> > >

> > > Paint it bright coral. I am really imagining he won't know

the

> > difference. I'll even bet you can put big letters on it that

says

> > TOY GUN and he won't know. I know what you are talking about

but

> > you are assuming he is reasoning and he is not. At least it

doesn't

> > seem like he is to me by your report. My Mom who could and had

> > obsession with money couldn't tell real coins from chocolate

one!

> > And that was real early on. I am betting you could even get one

of

> > those big ones that shoots soft balls and he won't know the

> > difference and no one will mistake that for a real gun. It sure

> > would be worth a try when your MIL in trying to sleep in the

middle

> > of the night.

> > >

> > > But you need to be the best judge of that. I just remember I

gave

> > Mom far to much credit for what she knew. And she did know

stuff,

> > but she couldn't reason. And my daughter would try outrageous

stuff

> > and it worked.

> > >

> > > Donna R

> > >

> > > Do you want to read more about Lewy Body? You can also read

the

> > Thistle, the LBD Newsletter. Just click on:

> > >

> > > http://www.lewybodydementia.org

> > >

> > > Re: FIL Had Hallucination Over the

> > Weekend...

> > >

May 22, 2006

I agree with Imogene completely.

Mom hallucinates often and her hallucinations are detailed and very real

to her. We just went through a long spell of dealing with her belief

that she works at the nursing home where she lives, and the staff at

night sleeps there. She was sure they were leaving her in charge of the

patients starting at 10 at night, and she obsessed about how she would

be able to provide their care. Mom is a retired RN who started out as a

nurses' aide, and a lot of her career was spent in hospitals and nursing

homes....so the environment puts her into that " work " mode.

I put in a phone for her, but prior to that the nurses would call and

ask if I could come over. I would reassure Mom that she did not work

there, but that she lived there. I told her the staff does not sleep

there. I tried being logical and rational FOR her...which had very

temporary effect and actually on occasion agitated her more because then

she worried about how her meals were being paid for, if she wasn't working.

As pointed out, we become creative problem solvers in dealing with

these. I told Mom, in one phone call, that she was retiring. She did

not have to work any longer, and I am paying her room and board there,

and she is a resident. I pointed out that she has spent years taking

care of other people and now people are going to take care of her.

She gave a long sigh...and said, quietly, " That would be so nice. " I

grabbed that and told her that room and board included laundry

services, housekeeping, and the gym for her to do exercises with

physical therapists to keep herself well. We discussed all the details

of what her room and board entitles her to have, and I told her that I

had arranged this with the Director of Nurses. I did talk to the DNS

about it, as Mom has talked to her about her " job. " Mom was worried

that the aides would be " mad " at her for leaving them in the lurch and

what would she tell them? I told her the DNS was taking care of that

(which she was) and Mom didn't have to bring it up. She subsequently

told me that it turned out everything was fine...though we had an extra

week of worry about her favorite aide and other problems Mom conjured up.

Mom hates having nothing to do. It is out of character for her - she

was always busy. It has been my policy to find projects for Mom ever

since she retired and started relying heavily on me for decision making

on her behalf. She is at her best when she has something to do, so we

are now creating a diagram of her room, on graph paper. Mom may not be

able to do this very well, but we will measure the furniture and her

space, I will cut out the furniture from the graph paper and we will

draw out the dimensions of her side of the room, and she can move her

furniture around to her heart's content on paper...and then we can turn

that into reality if she decides to do so. After that, we will start

working on a project for gifts for the grandkids (I think she can manage

decoupage as long as I do the cutting) and she is anxiously looking

forward to catalogs of craft supplies.

What I learned from my dad and his delusions/hallucinations is that it

is pointless to deny them or argue about them with our LO. Rather, I

validate how it makes Mom feel (upset, sad, frustrated, scared) and tell

her that I am going to see what I can do about that. She is comforted

that I am dealing with the issue for her, and is able to let go of it -

though it may require several times of reassurance that I am taking care

of it. I find it tremendously important to Mom's mental state to not

discount her concerns, fears, and hallucinations/delusions. It is also

important for me to remember that Mom cannot think things through in the

logical, rational way she once could. If I try to talk her through

logical problem solving, it is frustrating and upsetting to her.

Rather, I let her express herself completely and then offer her

reassurance as appropriate and sometimes even find a way to solve the

problem.

As far as the money bag and the banker are concerned, rather than

providing a gun of any kind, how about someone volunteering to take the

money to a safe deposit box or other place much safer than home as a

place to keep it? And perhaps talking to him about why he thinks he

needs a gun would be useful - and some other way to solve whatever the

problem is which requires a gun could be reached. If he's worried about

safety/security, maybe an alarm system would make him feel better, and

baby monitors could be used or the kind of alarms that hang on a

doorknob to alert to people coming in?

Good luck!

jacqui

***

Iward27663@... wrote:

> April, this is the sort of thing I am careful about. In stead of telling

> your FIL NO! How about, " I'll see what I can do, " and go off letting

> him think

> the BIL is trying to do something about it. Your FIL will get over

> it. Your

> BIL needs a packet of excuses to change the subject each time. Divert

> the FIL's

> attention.

>

> Get over Hallucinations? NO! Not from what I have been learning. In fact

> they tend to get worse, especially if they are of a violent or

> agitated nature.

> He needs to be watched carefully.

May 22, 2006

April,

You are a clever girl! Great idea!

Re: FIL Had Hallucination Over the

> Weekend...

> >

May 22, 2006

Imogene,

I didn't even consider that possibility! Thank you for opening my

eyes. Perhaps I should think again about telling my MIL about the

toy gun idea. Why can't things just be cut and dry?

April

- In LBDcaregivers , Iward27663@... wrote:

>

> Donna, there is a problem with a toy gun. If the family has to

call the

> police because the man is so violent and aggressive due to the

illness, ( and he

> cand get that way) then the police may shoot him, thinking it is

a real gun.

> That happened right here in our town.

>

> Imogene

>

> In a message dated 5/22/2006 8:40:08 AM Central Daylight Time,

> twomido@... writes:

>

> April,

>

> I wonder how a toy gun might help to satisify him? We seem to

keep

> replacing other things and if guns are his thing, it might work.

A squirt gun might

> make him feel safe and in all likely hood he will not know the

difference.

> We think they will but they don't, especially at night in the

middle of what

> he is going through. I am sure he will get through this phase,

but they sure

> do seem to know when people are taking things away from them.

And until it

> doesn't make any difference, and that point comes, it may just

work without

> hurting anyone.

>

> Donna R

>

> Do you want to read more about Lewy Body? You can also read the

Thistle, the

> LBD Newsletter. Just click on:

>

May 23, 2006

You said: " ...but they sure do seem to know when people are taking

things away from them. "

Ain't that the truth! My mother has terrible short term memory - but

she sure remembers the traumas.

* She remembers that her two evil daughters took away her beloved

yorkie from her. At least she doesn't talk about it much anymore, but

for the longest time that was one of the few things she was

continuously upset about.

* To this day, she still talks about her brother who passed away last

5/30 (and triggered her fast decline). To this day she'll mention her

poor brother and cry. It doesn't help that her female table-mate

is " Tommie " - her brother's name. I've learned I can't have the

following conversation: " I wonder where Tommie is? " or " Where's

Tommie? " Mom replies, " Our Tommy? " And I have to say " Not Uncle Tom,

Tommie, your table-mate. "

* Just a few weeks ago, I brought in her pocket book (which we always

called her 'feed bag' b/c the strap was too short to go over her

shoulder/head, so she wore it just over her head). I thought she

could use it in the NH to hold a couple of small activities and

tissues, since she always wants a tissue. Ended up taking it

back b/c the bag triggered the memory that it held her cigarettes.

Shortly after I gave it to her, she asked for a cigarette. Feed bag =

cigarettes/lighter in bag = smoking... That was the wrong move...

>

> April,

>

> I wonder how a toy gun might help to satisify him? We seem to keep

replacing other things and if guns are his thing, it might work. A

squirt gun might make him feel safe and in all likely hood he will

not know the difference. We think they will but they don't,

especially at night in the middle of what he is going through. I am

sure he will get through this phase, but they sure do seem to know

when people are taking things away from them. And until it doesn't

make any difference, and that point comes, it may just work without

hurting anyone.

>

> Donna R

>

> Do you want to read more about Lewy Body? You can also read the

Thistle, the LBD Newsletter. Just click on:

>

> http://www.lewybodydementia.org

>

> FIL Had Hallucination Over the Weekend...

>

May 26, 2006

how about a squirt gun, very safe, and the worst taht could happen is

somebody/thing gets wet. much better than a toy gun look alike which may be

misconstured and be dangerous after all, hugs, sharon m

--

Daugher of Leonard, diag May 2004, had lbd since 1993, had hip surgery from fall

7/05, aspiration pneumonia 7/05 with pulmonary embolyis, had aspiration

pneumonia and uti 8/05, died of blood pressure drop on 9/25/05,

may he rest in peace with his mom and dad,

a smile a day keeps the meanies away

---- aswest1021 wrote: