Guest guest Posted February 1, 2006 Report Share Posted February 1, 2006 R Pill = god too I am much less depressed since I started to take pills. All way are equal without a stressful story! -- work on the work MAry .. you asked us to do the work on the work. And write back by last friday. I wont post all of it.. but i figured out i want the work to heal me of my depression , and self hate and rejection. And to want to be healed is rejecting the now. AS long as i want to be healed I have self hate. Tamis email was helpful when she wrote grief is God. And happiness is not higher .. Still when i read others work it seems they do end up happier and than i am doing the work for a motive and expectation other than to just know the truth. All my life i have thought i should be better. And its stressful cant change a white flower to red SO this is an old story. thanks for the suggestion. love, roslyn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 4, 2006 Report Share Posted April 4, 2006 i figured out i want the work to heal me of my depression , and self hate and rejection. And to want to be healed is rejecting the now. AS long as i want to be healed I have self hate. *****Using this reasoning one gets: I have cancer. To want to be healed is rejecting the now. As long as I want to be healed I have self hate. Ahhhh.....now that makes sense. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 4, 2006 Report Share Posted April 4, 2006 Andy.. ok in that context it was a poor choice of words. I guess i was thinking of what LAurie had written when i wrote I wanted God to fix me and she said she thought i didnt need to be fixed. I wish god would fix me from believing lies.. but then i guess im still not ready to give up my stories...or i would love,roslyn - In Loving-what-is , " Andy " wrote: > > > > i figured out i want the work to heal me of my depression , and self > hate and rejection. And to want to be healed is rejecting the now. > AS long as i want to be healed I have self hate. > > > *****Using this reasoning one gets: > > I have cancer. > To want to be healed is rejecting the now. > As long as I want to be healed I have self hate. > > > Ahhhh.....now that makes sense. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 4, 2006 Report Share Posted April 4, 2006 Wouldnt you prefer to be less depressed and not on pills. ? I guess that is a story but that is what i prefer. A pill is depending on an external thing I dont want that. ISnt a pill stopping the genuine feeling? Thanks anyway, r > > R > > Pill = god too > > I am much less depressed since I started to take pills. > > All way are equal without a stressful story! > > -- work on the work > > MAry .. you asked us to do the work on the work. > And write back by last friday. > I wont post all of it.. but i figured out i want the work to heal me of > my depression , and self hate and rejection. > And to want to be healed is rejecting the now. > AS long as i want to be healed I have self hate. > Tamis email was helpful when she wrote grief is God. And happiness is > not higher .. > Still when i read others work it seems they do end up happier and than > i am doing the work for a motive and expectation other than to just know > the truth. > All my life i have thought i should be better. And its stressful > cant change a white flower to red > SO this is an old story. thanks for the suggestion. > love, roslyn > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 4, 2006 Report Share Posted April 4, 2006 Hey R > Wouldn't you prefer to be less depressed and not on pills. ? My honest answer would be NO > > I guess that is a story but that is what I prefer. I think you are not living your integrity and that is where it hurts. I hear you all the time saying: I don't want to be depressed. If you really don't ant to be depressed why do you ask me what I prefer: pills or being depressed free. I am like you, I DONT WANT TO BE DEPRESSED ! > > A pill is depending on an external thing I don't want that. External shmexternal Sex is external too. I want sex Food is external too. I want food is external too. I want (couldn't help it, sorry) Do you see where I am going with it? > > ISnt a pill stopping the genuine feeling? I don't know what genuine feeling is. I still have feeling, and they seem to be to be genuine And I am not saying: take pills, non of my business I do what is best for me, I don't know what is best for you Apparently, at the moment, your higher path is not to take pills!!!! T > > Thanks anyway, r > > > > > > > > > > > R > > > > Pill = god too > > > > I am much less depressed since I started to take pills. > > > > All way are equal without a stressful story! > > > > -- work on the work > > > > MAry .. You asked us to do the work on the work. > > And write back by last Friday. > > I wont post all of it.. But I figured out I want the work to heal > me of > > my depression , and self hate and rejection. > > And to want to be healed is rejecting the now. > > AS long as I want to be healed I have self hate. > > Tamis email was helpful when she wrote grief is God. And happiness is > > not higher .. > > Still when I read others work it seems they do end up happier and than > > I am doing the work for a motive and expectation other than to just > know > > the truth. > > All my life I have thought I should be better. And its stressful > > cant change a white flower to red > > SO this is an old story. Thanks for the suggestion. > > love, roslyn > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 4, 2006 Report Share Posted April 4, 2006 TRue.. however is that not contradicting the last post about looking forward to and not resisting depression??? I know is not against pills. ANd maybe i was an addict in a former life and so that path is not one i want to take anymore I dont remember but it is a possibility because i hate alcohol.. i have never liked the taste of any of it.. wine beer etc.. and I really do think i was an alcoholic in a former life And i have always hated swallowing pills.. which is weird too. but mainly from reading PScyhiatry Ultimate Betrayal. I dont want to go that direction. How do you know if your feeling good genuinely or its from a pill? I guess it doesnt matter really, R -- In Loving-what-is , " Tami " wrote: > > Hey R > > > Wouldn't you prefer to be less depressed and not on pills. ? > My honest answer would be NO > > > > I guess that is a story but that is what I prefer. > I think you are not living your integrity and that is where it hurts. > I hear you all the time saying: I don't want to be depressed. > If you really don't ant to be depressed why do you ask me what I > prefer: pills or being depressed free. > I am like you, I DONT WANT TO BE DEPRESSED ! > > > > A pill is depending on an external thing I don't want that. > External shmexternal > Sex is external too. I want sex > Food is external too. I want food > is external too. I want (couldn't help it, sorry) > Do you see where I am going with it? > > > > ISnt a pill stopping the genuine feeling? > I don't know what genuine feeling is. > I still have feeling, and they seem to be to be genuine > And I am not saying: take pills, non of my business > I do what is best for me, I don't know what is best for you > Apparently, at the moment, your higher path is not to take pills!!!! > > T > > > > Thanks anyway, r > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > R > > > > > > Pill = god too > > > > > > I am much less depressed since I started to take pills. > > > > > > All way are equal without a stressful story! > > > > > > -- work on the work > > > > > > MAry .. You asked us to do the work on the work. > > > And write back by last Friday. > > > I wont post all of it.. But I figured out I want the work to > heal > > me of > > > my depression , and self hate and rejection. > > > And to want to be healed is rejecting the now. > > > AS long as I want to be healed I have self hate. > > > Tamis email was helpful when she wrote grief is God. And > happiness is > > > not higher .. > > > Still when I read others work it seems they do end up happier > and than > > > I am doing the work for a motive and expectation other than to > just > > know > > > the truth. > > > All my life I have thought I should be better. And its stressful > > > cant change a white flower to red > > > SO this is an old story. Thanks for the suggestion. > > > love, roslyn > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 4, 2006 Report Share Posted April 4, 2006 dear r, You asked Tami: " Wouldnt you prefer to be less depressed and not on pills. ? " That would be just fine if it were possible, but it is not possible for everyone. Also, you said: " ISnt a pill stopping the genuine feeling? " r: In my experience there are no genuine feelings. Every feeling is caused by a thought and their purpose is to distract us from reality. Love, Steve D. > > > > R > > > > Pill = god too > > > > I am much less depressed since I started to take pills. > > > > All way are equal without a stressful story! > > > > -- work on the work > > > > MAry .. you asked us to do the work on the work. > > And write back by last friday. > > I wont post all of it.. but i figured out i want the work to heal > me of > > my depression , and self hate and rejection. > > And to want to be healed is rejecting the now. > > AS long as i want to be healed I have self hate. > > Tamis email was helpful when she wrote grief is God. And happiness is > > not higher .. > > Still when i read others work it seems they do end up happier and than > > i am doing the work for a motive and expectation other than to just > know > > the truth. > > All my life i have thought i should be better. And its stressful > > cant change a white flower to red > > SO this is an old story. thanks for the suggestion. > > love, roslyn > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 4, 2006 Report Share Posted April 4, 2006 Hi R TRue.. However is that not contradicting the last post about looking Forward to and not resisting depression??? [T] Are you looking for order in my posts? Come on R, I say one thing and than I can say the opposite But each post is independently beautiful I know is not against pills. [T] I think she is on drugs herself ANd maybe i was an addict in a former life and so that path is not one i want to take anymore I dont remember but it is a possibility because i hate alcohol.. [T] Before we go to past life, lets look at this life shell we? You are not suppose to take pills. Perfect! I think that in past life I have been a pill myself (the blue one) I have never liked the taste of any of it.. wine beer Etc.. and I really do think i was an alcoholic in a former life [T] Cheers ! And I have always hated swallowing pills.. Which is weird too. [T] I hate swallowing too, if you know what I mean??? But mainly from reading PScyhiatry Ultimate Betrayal. I don't want to Go that direction. [T] SO don't, but can you see a possibility that that direction could be good for others? I am not asking you that cause " THE OTHERS " needs your aproval I ask you to help you love what is ;-) How do you know if your feeling good genuinely or its from a pill? I guess it doesn't matter really, R [T] T -- In Loving-what-is , " Tami " wrote: > > Hey R > > > Wouldn't you prefer to be less depressed and not on pills. ? > My honest answer would be NO > > > > I guess that is a story but that is what I prefer. > I think you are not living your integrity and that is where it hurts. > I hear you all the time saying: I don't want to be depressed. > If you really don't ant to be depressed why do you ask me what I > prefer: pills or being depressed free. > I am like you, I DONT WANT TO BE DEPRESSED ! > > > > A pill is depending on an external thing I don't want that. > External shmexternal > Sex is external too. I want sex > Food is external too. I want food > is external too. I want (couldn't help it, sorry) > Do you see where I am going with it? > > > > ISnt a pill stopping the genuine feeling? > I don't know what genuine feeling is. > I still have feeling, and they seem to be to be genuine > And I am not saying: take pills, non of my business > I do what is best for me, I don't know what is best for you > Apparently, at the moment, your higher path is not to take pills!!!! > > T > > > > Thanks anyway, r > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > R > > > > > > Pill = god too > > > > > > I am much less depressed since I started to take pills. > > > > > > All way are equal without a stressful story! > > > > > > -- work on the work > > > > > > MAry .. You asked us to do the work on the work. > > > And write back by last Friday. > > > I wont post all of it.. But I figured out I want the work to > heal > > me of > > > my depression , and self hate and rejection. > > > And to want to be healed is rejecting the now. > > > AS long as I want to be healed I have self hate. > > > Tamis email was helpful when she wrote grief is God. And > happiness is > > > not higher .. > > > Still when I read others work it seems they do end up happier > and than > > > I am doing the work for a motive and expectation other than to > just > > know > > > the truth. > > > All my life I have thought I should be better. And its stressful > > > cant change a white flower to red > > > SO this is an old story. Thanks for the suggestion. > > > love, roslyn > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 5, 2006 Report Share Posted April 5, 2006 Thank you-MAry.. i learn so much from you. TOday i went by a homeless guy and asked him if he wanted some of my pizza and he said no.. Now i am wondering if i should go back and just leave a few pieces near him or what.? I just think he could be starving but i cant know that either. HE was sleeping on some blankets near an abandoned building. I hope he is ok. It was funny because i sensed he was there before i saw him. I might go back. love, roslyn -- In Loving-what-is , " " wrote: > > i want the work to heal me of > > my depression , and self hate and rejection. > > And to want to be healed is rejecting the now. > > AS long as i want to be healed I have self hate. > > > Roslyn, > > Thank you. Your words are helping me cuz I was feeling lost in the > darkness, and they are pointing me towards the light. > > I want so to not be bothered by how others are. I want to be other than > I am. And as long as I want to be different than I am, there is self > hate. Wow, I didn't realize this before. > > We're like , bless her heart. We too were stuck in bed, and now > we're hearing the voice that's saying 'get up, get moving,' and our > movement is creating a wave of some sort. > > I am glad we're on this journey together my friend. > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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