P.S.

[Guest guest]

How do you deal with a sense of unworthiness? It is just a terrible

waste of time. I know my current therapist would ask me what stake I

have in holding onto this sense of my own lack of worth. My first

answer is that it is familiar to me and my second is that it is a

deeply rooted coping mechanism. I mean, if promises your parents make

are not kept, it must be because you are unworthy, right? To think

that they--your caretakers on whom you depend--are irresponsible is

unthinkale. Those are my provisional answers.

How do those of you who have a sense that you are not entitled to

anything except degradation (well, I think that's part of my syndrome

anyway) deal with that and give yourselves a sense of entitlement?

I'm just so sick of feeling this way.

[Guest guest]

Therese,

I felt unworthy because my nada told me I was, and as I child, I

believed her and carried that belief into my adult life. I had to

purposefully change my thinking on this, and it took several years of

conscious effort. I am dealing now with the last of the issues that

were caused by my feeling unworthy.

You have had many difficult situations to overcome. But you have

overcome them. I can also understand the frustration of not being

where you would like to be in your life. I also am not where I thought

I would be....but I also didn't know about BPD and how being raised by

a nada created obstacles of which I wasn't even aware.

I no longer berate myself for the mistakes I made in the past. I did

the best I could with what I had and what I knew. " Now that I know

better - I do better. "

You have go through so much in the last few years. Give yourself the

time you need to recover. I see that you have family and friends that

do not think you are worthless - they are interested in helping you and

interested in helping your progress with you career. I used to be so

overcome with the worthless feeling, that I did not see the good things

in my life.

It is a waste of time and energy to feed the worthless feeling by

reviewing the mistakes of the past. You need to devote your energy to

what will help you, not what will pull you down. If you have learned

from those mistakes, and are not repeating them, then you have made

progress.

Take care,

Sylvia

> How do you deal with a sense of unworthiness? It is just a terrible

> waste of time. I know my current therapist would ask me what stake I

> have in holding onto this sense of my own lack of worth. My first

> answer is that it is familiar to me and my second is that it is a

> deeply rooted coping mechanism. I mean, if promises your parents

make

> are not kept, it must be because you are unworthy, right? To think

> that they--your caretakers on whom you depend--are irresponsible is

> unthinkale. Those are my provisional answers.

>

> How do those of you who have a sense that you are not entitled to

> anything except degradation (well, I think that's part of my syndrome

> anyway) deal with that and give yourselves a sense of entitlement?

> I'm just so sick of feeling this way.