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Hi ,

It's frustrating. Give the doctor a little time to see " what's

what. " But be looking around for who else to contact just in case

this isn't going to work out. Some therapists and doctors seem to

go in the wrong direction with OCD (due to not understanding it

perhaps?). Like concentrating on the divorce instead of the OCD. I

know 's psychologist (also a friend) seemed to think more of

the conflict between him and sometimes than working on his OC

behaviors, though he would give him " homework. " My thought was that

even if & had done a turnaround and become best

friends, the OCD would still be there. ( is 's twin)

>

> Hi everyone!

>

> Just got back from the shrink. First appointment and I'm so

disappointed. I guess I was unrealistically expecting a magic cure

TODAY for my daughter. I need to calm myself down.

>

> They are sending some questionnaires for her father and I to

fill out and send back, on ocd and life in general. Then in 2 weeks

her father and I go back by ourselves to talk. THEN they will know

more and know what to do.

>

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Hi ,

I have been to four therapists with my 11 year old son so far. In my

experience the two therapists that knew the least about ocd wanted to

focus on other things besides the ocd first. One therapist

especially made it pretty clear that he thought the ocd was in

response to our family life. In my opinion from all the reading I've

done here and in books, OCD is a brain/chemical thing. It is not

caused by outside issues. It can be aggravated by stress (good or

bad) but the ocd needs to be dealt with itself except in rare cases

with an extremely stressful homelife (I don't think divorce

automatically falls into that catagory).

The fourth therapist we went to see started to work on dealing with

the ocd right away. I left the first appt. feeling great. He didn't

get into family life at all. (Actually, the first therapist we saw

understood ocd and that it was chemical and didn't get into family

life issues, but she was not trained in cbt or erp. She confirmed

with me that our family life was not the cause or cure for 's ocd)

Trust your gut feelings and if the therapist doesn't want to face the

ocd right off the bat, they may not know what they're doing. I

wasted time going to people I wanted to help up but knew in my heart

they couldn't.

>

> Hi everyone!

>

> Just got back from the shrink. First appointment and I'm so

disappointed. I guess I was unrealistically expecting a magic cure

TODAY for my daughter. I need to calm myself down.

>

> They are sending some questionnaires for her father and I to fill

out and send back, on ocd and life in general. Then in 2 weeks her

father and I go back by ourselves to talk. THEN they will know more

and know what to do.

>

> It just seems to take so long. She made it sound like my daughter

was just suffering because of the divorce and I know in my heart it's

NOT just that.

>

> So the ball is finally rolling and I just need to roll with it

and calm myself down. One day at a time, as I usually say in another

group I am part of.

>

> Hugs to all,

>

>

>

>

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good luck - yes one day at a time - hard not to just want to jump in

and fix it -

eileen

Quoting L <bamama48@...>:

> Hi everyone!

>

> Just got back from the shrink. First appointment and I'm so

> disappointed. I guess I was unrealistically expecting a magic cure

> TODAY for my daughter. I need to calm myself down.

>

> They are sending some questionnaires for her father and I to fill

> out and send back, on ocd and life in general. Then in 2 weeks her

> father and I go back by ourselves to talk. THEN they will know more

> and know what to do.

>

> It just seems to take so long. She made it sound like my daughter

> was just suffering because of the divorce and I know in my heart

> it's NOT just that.

>

> So the ball is finally rolling and I just need to roll with it and

> calm myself down. One day at a time, as I usually say in another

> group I am part of.

>

> Hugs to all,

>

>

>

>

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Hi ,

Hang in there, it does take awhile during the assessment stages. We

started our journey in June and went through the summer with all the

assessments and regular counselling for my daughter. In September she

had slipped into a deep depression so our GP pulled a favour and got

her into the psychiatrist in 2 weeks. After that things just started

getting better as there was no doubt it was OCD and we started meds

right away. The regular counselling also then turned to OCD therapy

too. We are in Canada though, I think things move quicker in the US?

Her OCD is as strong as ever but she knows now what it is and

understands it is not her fault. A huge step. Good luck with

everything and hope things move quickly. As to the part where they

stated this could be just a reaction to the divorce? From all that I

was told by the psych is that OCD is biological, it can flare up under

times of stress but stress does not cause OCD. How old is your little

girl?

Take care,

Kim M

>

> Hi everyone!

>

> Just got back from the shrink. First appointment and I'm so

disappointed. I guess I was unrealistically expecting a magic cure

TODAY for my daughter. I need to calm myself down.

>

>

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Hi

my dd has OCD, eating disorder, huge anxiety probs so can hardly go to

school at mo etc but when profs dont know what to try to get her into school

they

have to suggest things like " be forceful with her " as if your not- what makes

them think Im not(its so frustrating forceful is the LEAST of it!- u want to

scream at her) & be consistant-they havent got a clue what its like trying to

get a child whose frightened of it to go into school, sometimes they need

" persuation " & sometimes an " order " but i feel it can imply blame rather than

admit that there isnt much that they can do

xxx

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Hi ,

Our first pdoc said that Mikayla was anxious because we had newborn

twins and she wasn't getting enough attention. I agree that the " good

stress " of having 2 little brothers probably caused her OCD onset, but

that's where we parted ways. She wanted to do lots of talk therapy

about her past, anger, jealousy, etc, and my daughter was very confused.

She loved her new brothers! She didn't want to be angry at them. She

didn't want to think that she had OCD because of them. We found a new

pdoc who still does a little of this, but is more on board with her

meds. and what to do NOW to help her OCD, not dig into the past to see

what caused it. Maybe the divorce triggered it, who knows? But, it

would have manifested at some point with some stressor.

Hugs,

Dina

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In a message dated 11/15/2006 7:50:59 A.M. Eastern Standard Time,

bamama48@... writes:

Just got back from the shrink. First appointment and I'm so disappointed. I

guess I was unrealistically expecting a magic cure TODAY for my daughter. I

need to calm myself

down..................................................................She made

it sound like my daughter was just suffering because of

the divorce and I know in my heart it's NOT just that.

I felt the same way when we first went to a psychologist for help. I

thought - this is great, this doctor will just tell us what to do, and that will

be

that. WRONG!!! Yes, it is a long journey, but hopefully it will be a

successful one for you daughter!

OCD is a chemical imbalance in the brain & from what I understand, a person

is born with it. Who knows, maybe there are folks out there with OCD who

never actually have symptoms come to the surface - I'm sure we'll never know.

Something happens to bring these symptoms out. In my daughter's case, it was

the death of 2 people very close to her. While it may have sounded like the

therapist was " blaming " the divorce for your daughter's OCD, maybe she was

just trying to find something to pinpoint the onset of the symptoms??

In any case, it really doesn't matter what happened that caused the symptoms

to surface - what matters is that you're getting your child the help she

needs to overcome this.

People say things that upset us - everyone does, even doctors. I don't

think they mean to upset us, it's just how what's said is taken. I remember

our

2nd psychologist who looked at us across the room & (in front of my daughter)

says, " If she doesn't want to come to these appts, there's no point in

bringing her - it's better for her not to come at all. " Well, I wanted to

spring

out of my chair & smack the woman right in the head. It took every ounce of

energy for us to get our daughter to those appts. She cried & begged & was

angry, etc. Of course she didn't " want " to go - she was only 14 and we sat

around talking about how she rubbed her breasts raw in the shower, or how she

wiped herself so aggressively, she was bleeding from her rectum after going to

the bathroom.... what teenager would WANT to go do that??? But, without

therapy, what would we do???

Well, anyway, this post got a little carried away. Sorry. Hang in there.

LT

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In a message dated 11/16/2006 6:13:28 P.M. Eastern Standard Time,

herronmat@... writes:

>>Anyway, per a previous post, we are now searching for another

>> " professional " to help us.

Ummm.... sounds like you're doing the right thing to me!!!!

LT

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We just had our first appt Tuesday and it was very disappointing!

I brought Dr. Chansky's books with me to help ask questions. The

therapist did not agree with much of what is in those books. However,

applying some of the techniques at home have helped.

The therapist had never heard of PANDAS (our son has most of the

redflags), he/she spent about 1/2 hour trying to convince me that the

problem is Tourretes (sp?) not OCD, then at the end of the FOUR HOUR

session, he said... Oh, after speaking with my son it is clearly OCD.

It was like the guy was playing games with me.

He told me several times that it was my fault - didn't say how or why

and I **think** he was joking but I'm not really sure.

He said to all three of us (wife, husband, son) that that evening

would be OCD bad and the next day would be really really bad. Not

sure if he was doing some kind of reverse psych. thing or what but we

had a good evening and a great next day.

Anyway, per a previous post, we are now searching for another

" professional " to help us.

Vent, vent, vent, vent...

>

>

> In a message dated 11/15/2006 7:50:59 A.M. Eastern Standard Time,

> bamama48@... writes:

>

> Just got back from the shrink. First appointment and I'm so

disappointed. I

> guess I was unrealistically expecting a magic cure TODAY for my

daughter. I

> need to calm myself

>

down..................................................................She

made it sound like my daughter was just suffering because of

> the divorce and I know in my heart it's NOT just that.

>

>

>

>

> I felt the same way when we first went to a psychologist for help. I

> thought - this is great, this doctor will just tell us what to do,

and that will be

> that. WRONG!!! Yes, it is a long journey, but hopefully it will be a

> successful one for you daughter!

>

> OCD is a chemical imbalance in the brain & from what I understand, a

person

> is born with it. Who knows, maybe there are folks out there with

OCD who

> never actually have symptoms come to the surface - I'm sure we'll

never know.

> Something happens to bring these symptoms out. In my daughter's

case, it was

> the death of 2 people very close to her. While it may have sounded

like the

> therapist was " blaming " the divorce for your daughter's OCD, maybe

she was

> just trying to find something to pinpoint the onset of the symptoms??

>

> In any case, it really doesn't matter what happened that caused the

symptoms

> to surface - what matters is that you're getting your child the help

she

> needs to overcome this.

>

> People say things that upset us - everyone does, even doctors. I

don't

> think they mean to upset us, it's just how what's said is taken. I

remember our

> 2nd psychologist who looked at us across the room & (in front of my

daughter)

> says, " If she doesn't want to come to these appts, there's no point in

> bringing her - it's better for her not to come at all. " Well, I

wanted to spring

> out of my chair & smack the woman right in the head. It took every

ounce of

> energy for us to get our daughter to those appts. She cried &

begged & was

> angry, etc. Of course she didn't " want " to go - she was only 14

and we sat

> around talking about how she rubbed her breasts raw in the shower,

or how she

> wiped herself so aggressively, she was bleeding from her rectum

after going to

> the bathroom.... what teenager would WANT to go do that??? But,

without

> therapy, what would we do???

>

> Well, anyway, this post got a little carried away. Sorry. Hang in

there.

> LT

>

>

>

>

>

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> All I have to say is, " RUN! " Why are there so many incompetent

> therapists out there? Ugh! Good luck finding someone better. I

> think I'd screen them by phone first rather than waste your time. We

> have a boarderline pdoc. Sometimes I think she gets it, and other

> times she's way off base. It's so frustrating. Our last appt. was

> one of those frustrating ones. She doesn't get ERP and doesn't

> recommend doing it with our 11 yr. old because she'd much rather

> control her with meds. At some point we'll have to try and find a

> therapist to do ERP on our own. Right now her symptoms are minor.

>

> Dina

>

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