RE: OT/Opinion Question

[Guest guest]

I am invisible because I use ....and I am so the wrong person

to ask about Caitlyn. If your the #1 protective mommy on the list

you might as well just sign me up as #2! lol :-)

Its always been my preference for my kids to have their friends at

our house so that I know everyone is safe, except for those few

really close friends that you trust.

So, I would probably say no. She is only 13. I guess I just would

have a hard time with the fact that they are so far away and would

be staying possibly with neighbors that you don't know. Again, I am

paranoid though and I am sure others would say you have to let go

some time.

You know whats funny....I just pictured ours girls on the kids list

chatting about over-protective parents! lol

Aundrea and her friend were at the park on Sunday evening. A few

blocks from our house. My husband was home and I was off getting

groceries. Anyway, a strange man pulled over in his car and yelled

at the girls that he had candy and cash and for them to come over.

Aundrea yelled " get away from us you freak " and they proceeded to

run away...Now, do you think my sweet little blonde girl even

mentioned this to me....NOPE, I get a call from the other girls mom

who tells me about the incident...Why did Aundrea not tell me...Well

she told her friend that if she mentioned this to me, she would

never get to leave her yard again...How right she is! :-)

It's so tough to be a mom isn't it?

good luck with your decision!

sonia (aundrea 10 systemic jra)---

In , ThreeMayEmeralds@a... wrote:

>

> Hi Everyone:

>

> Funny, as I am responding to emails I can tell that Stacia,

and Liz

> are online doing the same, but you guys aren't on AOL so I don't

see you, my

> invisible friends.

>

> I have a question and looking for your opinion(s). Caitlin (13)

has been

> asked to join a new friend (I have never met her or her family.)

and her family

> up country to go snowmobiling for the weekend. Fun right, but I

just don't

> know. Here's some of the information I learned from the

conversation with

> her Mom:

>

> It's a 4 hour drive to get there.

> It's usually 20 BELOW zero there.

> They go out for approximately 6 hours a day.

> They will go out Saturday, Sunday and Monday.

> They sometimes go to a neighbor's house and leave the kids behind

playing

> Nintendo.

> They are in a mobile home on 1/2 acre with roudy people in front

of them and

> behind them.

> They went hunting the weekend before for Elk and target shooting.

> Caitlin won't be able to go on the back of the snowmobile of her

friend, as

> she isn't 16 so she will be on the back of the Mom's.

> " It's like a great big party there " . They get together with a lot

of

> friends/people.

> They are forcasting some rain, snow and freezing rain.

>

> Caitlin has never been snowmobiling and grew up in VA, so she's

not exactly

> used to the below freezing temperatures. I have a lot of

reservations, but

> Caitlin, of course, wants to go. Would you let your child go or

not? What

> would your concerns be? Am I just being a paranoid and

overprotective Mom if I

> say no. I tend to be overprotective, but am concerned for many

reasons

> about this trip.

>

> Thanks all. Take care.

> Patty

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Patty,

If it were up to me, I would not be sending Holly out there, I am very

particular about even close sleepovers....I have to see the house and meet the

parents first. But to have her 4 hours away, and them expecting to be out 6

hors at a time, there is no way Holly could even sit that length of time for 1

day, never mind 3 in a row. Nope to many " issues " involved for me to even

think about it...Hope it helps, it is always hard being the person saying the

" no " but you have to do what you think is right....

Luv and hugs,

Aj and Holly (12 yrs old, systemic jra since 9/94)

_www.caringbridge.org/visit/holly_ (http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/holly)

[Guest guest]

Patty,

Is there any way that you can ease Caitlin into this friendship? Like

sleepovers and such before a trip away. I would be iffy on letting her go.

Is there any way you can get together with the parents before the trip face

to face and kinda get a feel for the situation? I do not think you are

being overprotective at all.. Your ARE the momma and you know best even

though Caitlin might not agree..

take care,

Emilie

OT/Opinion Question

> Hi Everyone:

>

> Funny, as I am responding to emails I can tell that Stacia, and Liz

> are online doing the same, but you guys aren't on AOL so I don't see you,

> my

> invisible friends.

>

> I have a question and looking for your opinion(s). Caitlin (13) has been

> asked to join a new friend (I have never met her or her family.) and her

> family

> up country to go snowmobiling for the weekend. Fun right, but I just

> don't

> know. Here's some of the information I learned from the conversation

> with

> her Mom:

>

> It's a 4 hour drive to get there.

> It's usually 20 BELOW zero there.

> They go out for approximately 6 hours a day.

> They will go out Saturday, Sunday and Monday.

> They sometimes go to a neighbor's house and leave the kids behind playing

> Nintendo.

> They are in a mobile home on 1/2 acre with roudy people in front of them

> and

> behind them.

> They went hunting the weekend before for Elk and target shooting.

> Caitlin won't be able to go on the back of the snowmobile of her friend,

> as

> she isn't 16 so she will be on the back of the Mom's.

> " It's like a great big party there " . They get together with a lot of

> friends/people.

> They are forcasting some rain, snow and freezing rain.

>

> Caitlin has never been snowmobiling and grew up in VA, so she's not

> exactly

> used to the below freezing temperatures. I have a lot of reservations,

> but

> Caitlin, of course, wants to go. Would you let your child go or not?

> What

> would your concerns be? Am I just being a paranoid and overprotective

> Mom if I

> say no. I tend to be overprotective, but am concerned for many reasons

> about this trip.

>

> Thanks all. Take care.

> Patty

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Patty,

Honestly, I wouldn't allow her to go. As you said, you don't know the

family. That makes a regular sleepover hard, but this invite goes way beyond

that. It's sweet of them to invite Caitlin, but they are strangers to you

and they're going quite a ways from home. This, in my opinion, needs to be

one of those times that your kid things you're the meanest mother. Caitlin

may not understand now but someday she will.

Liz (Who is on teenager #5!!)

_____

From: [mailto: ] On Behalf

Of ThreeMayEmeralds@...

Sent: Wednesday, January 11, 2006 1:59 PM

Subject: OT/Opinion Question

Hi Everyone:

Funny, as I am responding to emails I can tell that Stacia, and Liz

are online doing the same, but you guys aren't on AOL so I don't see you, my

invisible friends.

I have a question and looking for your opinion(s). Caitlin (13) has been

asked to join a new friend (I have never met her or her family.) and her

family

up country to go snowmobiling for the weekend. Fun right, but I just don't

know. Here's some of the information I learned from the conversation with

her Mom:

It's a 4 hour drive to get there.

It's usually 20 BELOW zero there.

They go out for approximately 6 hours a day.

They will go out Saturday, Sunday and Monday.

They sometimes go to a neighbor's house and leave the kids behind playing

Nintendo.

They are in a mobile home on 1/2 acre with roudy people in front of them

and

behind them.

They went hunting the weekend before for Elk and target shooting.

Caitlin won't be able to go on the back of the snowmobile of her friend, as

she isn't 16 so she will be on the back of the Mom's.

" It's like a great big party there " . They get together with a lot of

friends/people.

They are forcasting some rain, snow and freezing rain.

Caitlin has never been snowmobiling and grew up in VA, so she's not exactly

used to the below freezing temperatures. I have a lot of reservations, but

Caitlin, of course, wants to go. Would you let your child go or not? What

would your concerns be? Am I just being a paranoid and overprotective Mom

if I

say no. I tend to be overprotective, but am concerned for many reasons

about this trip.

Thanks all. Take care.

Patty

[Guest guest]

Hello Patty,

I don't have kids, So I can't really hip you with the matter of

giving you advice about letting your daughter go with a friend that

you don't know very well and you don't know there parents. but being

that I live in a very cold winter area. and 20 below zero isn't that

uncommon here. 20 below zero is exteremly cold specially if you guys

are not use to that kind of cold and can be dangerous to be out in

for long periods of time. I am not sure where you live at, but here

our back country has recieved a great deal of snow this last week

and with that it could have it's own risks. At 20 below zero I never

go outside for long periods of time even when I am well dressed for

that kind of temp. The longest I spend outside at one time is maybe

an hour. I didn't write this email to scare or frighten you, but

more to inform you about the type of conditions that you mentioned.

It sounds like you might even live somewhere near me, maybe not in

MT but somewhere in the west. If I have frighten you I am sorry for

that.

>

> Hi Everyone:

>

> Funny, as I am responding to emails I can tell that Stacia,

and Liz

> are online doing the same, but you guys aren't on AOL so I don't

see you, my

> invisible friends.

>

> I have a question and looking for your opinion(s). Caitlin (13)

has been

> asked to join a new friend (I have never met her or her family.)

and her family

> up country to go snowmobiling for the weekend. Fun right, but I

just don't

> know. Here's some of the information I learned from the

conversation with

> her Mom:

>

> It's a 4 hour drive to get there.

> It's usually 20 BELOW zero there.

> They go out for approximately 6 hours a day.

> They will go out Saturday, Sunday and Monday.

> They sometimes go to a neighbor's house and leave the kids behind

playing

> Nintendo.

> They are in a mobile home on 1/2 acre with roudy people in front

of them and

> behind them.

> They went hunting the weekend before for Elk and target shooting.

> Caitlin won't be able to go on the back of the snowmobile of her

friend, as

> she isn't 16 so she will be on the back of the Mom's.

> " It's like a great big party there " . They get together with a lot

of

> friends/people.

> They are forcasting some rain, snow and freezing rain.

>

> Caitlin has never been snowmobiling and grew up in VA, so she's

not exactly

> used to the below freezing temperatures. I have a lot of

reservations, but

> Caitlin, of course, wants to go. Would you let your child go or

not? What

> would your concerns be? Am I just being a paranoid and

overprotective Mom if I

> say no. I tend to be overprotective, but am concerned for many

reasons

> about this trip.

>

> Thanks all. Take care.

> Patty

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Patty,

First I see your concern's of not knowing the family in question,

that would be the primary issue. As for the issue of the weather and

snowmobiling activity, it appears from your imfor that these people are

regular winter outdoors people. So I tend to think they take care in

their prep for the outings.

Always activities in extreme cold is an issue no matter the situation or

the individual who engageous in them. I lived most of my life, (47 years)

in a wintery climite and enjoyed many of those winter activities. I am

one who actualy feels better, jra wise in sub 0 temps! If it were not

for the absence of my right hip joint, I would be out skiing or

snowmobiling up in Michigan.

My only advise on this issue is, if your concern's are mostly base on her

JRA and the level of physical activity she may incur, then don't let that

be your deceiding factor. However the issue of not knowing the parent's,

then you need to let your daughter know that you need to meet and get

aquainted with them and their daughter first, before you can begin to

enterain the idea of Catlin going on any retreat's with them.

Just my opinion!

hplta

Rusty

[Guest guest]

Have to say I am agree with Rusty. If you are not sure of the family,

you'll be a basket case the whole time she is gone. If you can meet with

them, and feel comfortable, then ok. I am not sure I would let one of

mine go either. Just my thoughts, Michele

Re: OT/Opinion Question

Patty,

First I see your concern's of not knowing the family in

question,

that would be the primary issue. As for the issue of the weather and

snowmobiling activity, it appears from your imfor that these people are

regular winter outdoors people. So I tend to think they take care in

their prep for the outings.

Always activities in extreme cold is an issue no matter the situation or

the individual who engageous in them. I lived most of my life, (47

years)

in a wintery climite and enjoyed many of those winter activities. I am

one who actualy feels better, jra wise in sub 0 temps! If it were not

for the absence of my right hip joint, I would be out skiing or

snowmobiling up in Michigan.

My only advise on this issue is, if your concern's are mostly base on

her

JRA and the level of physical activity she may incur, then don't let

that

be your deceiding factor. However the issue of not knowing the parent's,

then you need to let your daughter know that you need to meet and get

aquainted with them and their daughter first, before you can begin to

enterain the idea of Catlin going on any retreat's with them.

Just my opinion!

hplta

Rusty

[Guest guest]

Oh Dear Patty,

That's a good one, but I say no way in he** for the primary reason

that you and your husband don't know this family. Is there any way

you can invite them over for dinner, or an appetizer or something

like that to get a feel if their social behaviors jive with yours?

You need to get a feel for what kind of risk takers they are...some

snowmobiliers are model outdoorsmen and others can be utterly

unruly, wild and not to mention disrespectful of other people trying

to enjoy the outdoors and wildlife. They sound like partiers, which

there's nothing wrong with that (I'm one myself), but you need 100%

comfort to have them and possibly their neighbors taking care of

Caitlin.

I would also have lots of questions about their guns they use for

elk hunting. Are they kept at the cabin? Are they locked in a gun

locker? I could go on.

I wouldn't worry about the cold as long as you prepare with the

right amount of long underwear, thick socks, boots, hand warmers

(those little ones you unwrap and keep in your mittens that last 8

hours), hats, etc.

Good luck with your decision and take all the opinions with a greain

of salt.

Stacia

[Guest guest]

Patty, in terms of letting your daughter go with this family I am not sure

what to say except go with what feels right. My dad always says, " if in doubt,

toss it out " so if you have doubts dont do it.

Donna